Chapter 1857 What I want is to be your friend for life.
Chapter 1857 What I want is to be your friend for life.
On this point, the answer is clearly no.
Letting go and turning to broader possibilities is a more responsible choice for yourself and others.
Ogiso Setsuna could have done just as the group admin suggested, focusing her energy on self-improvement and exploring the unknown, to witness the world that the chat group connects to—a world far larger than a school romance.
When she has power, knowledge, and a longer life, her current troubles may really seem insignificant.
"I should do that."
"I must try to change."
She said to herself, her tone carrying a resolute seriousness.
However, she also clearly knows that there is a huge gap between "knowing" and "doing".
Emotions are not like a tap that can be turned off at will.
The delicate emotional depictions in the memory copy, the feelings of excitement, anticipation, bitterness, and reluctance, are not unfamiliar stories unrelated to her.
They are like seeds, quietly sown in her heart.
The budding affection she felt for Kitahara Haruki, and the preciousness she held for the delicate balance among the three of them, were not traces that could be easily erased.
"But it is precisely because it is difficult that we need to try harder, right?"
Ogiso Setsuna took a deep breath, her gaze gradually hardening.
She wouldn't naively believe that she could immediately and completely sever all emotions and become a cold person; that wouldn't be her, Ogiso Setsuna.
But she can consciously adjust her mindset and actions.
She would try her best to restrain her impulse to get close to Kitahara Haruki, and no longer actively maintain that fragile balance as she did in the memory copy.
She will shift more of her attention to the infinite possibilities offered by the chat group, to learn about points, features, the worlds of different group members, and to think about the path she truly wants to pursue in the future.
She will try to treat Kitahara Haruki and Touma Kazusa the same way she treats other classmates, in order to avoid falling into that complicated vortex again.
This process is destined to be difficult; there may be setbacks, struggles, and even feelings of loneliness and loss, but she is willing to try.
Because she understands that this is for a more promising future, one that she will create herself.
Ogiso Setsuna: "Thank you, group admin, and Umaru."
Ogiso Setsuna: "I think I understand what to do; I will work towards that goal in the future."
Ogiso Setsuna expressed her gratitude to Su Yunqing and Umaru, and almost at the same time she sent the message, Touma Kazusa's previously dimmed profile picture suddenly lit up.
Although she had logged off earlier, due to the turmoil in her heart, she once again immersed herself in the chat group and saw Ogiso Setsuna's words.
An indescribable emotion, a mixture of anger, disappointment, and a sense of betrayal, instantly shattered Touma Kazusa's barely maintained composure.
Touma Kazusa: "Heh, that's easy for you to say, Ogiso."
Touma Kazusa: "'Do you understand what to do?' 'Strive in this direction'?"
Touma Kazusa: "So, for you, is it so easy to 'let go' and 'change direction' about everything that happened and might happen in those 'future' memory copies?"
Touma Kazusa: "That indecisive idiot, and all the tangled mess between the three of us."
Touma Kazusa: "To you, is it just a 'mistake' that can be easily avoided? A 'detour' that needs to be 'tried' to correct?"
Previously, Ogiso Setsuna was the one who hesitated about this future, while Touma Kazusa expressed resistance to the future in the memory copy. However, at this moment, Ogiso Setsuna has decided to give up that future, while Touma Kazusa shows a completely different reaction from Ogiso Setsuna.
Ultimately, it comes down to the different experiences the two people have had.
As for Ogiso Setsuna, although she cherishes feelings and doesn't want others to get hurt, compared to the three people who will each get hurt in the future, it is obviously the right thing to do now to avoid getting involved in this relationship.
But for Touma Kazusa, that "future," though filled with pain and struggle, also contained a "warmth" and "connection" from outside her mother in her memories that she desperately longed for, and which she may have felt for the first time in her life.
Haruki Kitahara's clumsy yet persistent approach, and the friendship between her and Setsuna Ogiso, which she herself might not even be willing to admit.
She received too little warmth in her life.
Even the smallest glimmer of light and warmth in the "future," which was filled with immense pain and heartbreak, was incredibly precious to her, so precious that she couldn't bear to discard it easily.
Her previous anger and resistance weren't necessarily a genuine desire to completely deny the relationship; rather, they were more like the awkward defensiveness of a child with extreme insecurity, fearing that a precious toy about to be acquired might cause harm.
She was using aggressive language to mask her inner fears and vulnerable needs.
Now, Ogiso Setsuna's "easy" decision to give up that future is, in Touma Kazusa's eyes, nothing short of a "betrayal" and "contempt".
It was as if those emotions that were incredibly heavy and difficult for her to let go of were burdens that could be rationally weighed and put down in the eyes of the other person.
Touma Kazusa: "You're quite open-minded."
Touma Kazusa: "But I can't be as 'wise' as you."
Touma Kazusa: "Even if those things were painful, they were still real possibilities that existed!"
She typed that last sentence almost through gritted teeth, conveying a stubbornness and sorrow born of desperation.
When faced with Touma Kazusa's barbed, almost accusatory questioning, Ogiso Setsuna did not get angry or refute it.
Instead, after a moment of silence, she spoke in the chat group in an unusually gentle tone.
Ogiso Setsuna: "Kazusa-san, I understand."
Ogiso Setsuna: "I understand your pain, and I understand your reluctance to let go."
Ogiso Setsuna: "Perhaps in your eyes, it would seem hypocritical for someone like me, who hasn't really experienced those things, to say anything about 'understanding'."
Ogiso Setsuna: "But through that copy of memory, I did see and feel a lot."
Setsuna Ogiso: "I saw your longing for that warmth, I saw how carefully you guarded your heart, and I saw the fear and anxiety you felt because you were afraid of losing it."
Ogiso Setsuna: "I understand that for you, those futures, even those filled with pain, represent something very precious and hard to let go of."
Ogiso Setsuna: "Because it contains people and emotions that you care about very much."
There was no accusation or defense in her tone, only a sincere attempt to understand the other person's heart.
Ogiso Setsuna: "My decision to no longer participate in that love that could cause everyone pain does not mean that I have underestimated the possibility of that 'future,' nor does it mean that I have given up the friendship that may exist between you and Kazusa."
Ogiso Setsuna: "On the contrary, it is precisely because I saw the estrangement and hurt between the three of us caused by that feeling in the memory copy that I hope we can avoid repeating the same mistakes."
Ogiso Setsuna: "If possible, I hope to get to know you, understand you, and become friends with you in another way, a way that is not tainted by complicated romantic entanglements."
Ogiso Setsuna: "Wouldn't such a future be more anticipated than the tearful ending in my memory?"
For Ogiso Setsuna, what she wanted to give up was the painful "love" she had with Kitazono Haruki and Touma Kazusa, not her friendship with Touma Kazusa.
Having seen the memory copy, she clearly knows what kind of person Touma Kazusa is, and understands even more how much she cherishes this friendship.
Therefore, she will cherish this friendship as well, but she will develop it in a different way.
Touma Kazusa: "What did you say?"
Touma Kazusa was stunned by Ogiso Setsuna's response.
The rebuttals, explanations, and even arguments she had anticipated did not materialize; instead, there were only Ogiso Setsuna's kind words.
Ogiso Setsuna did not deny her idea, nor did she stand on the moral high ground to criticize her persistence. Instead, she separated "Touma Kazusa" from that complicated emotional relationship and expressed her desire to establish a friendship with her alone.
This response was like a gentle straight ball, shattering the protective shell that Touma Kazusa relied on, leaving her momentarily at a loss for how to respond.
The feeling of being "betrayed" had quietly dissipated, replaced by a complex sense of bewilderment tinged with helplessness.
"Friends?"
This word was both unfamiliar and irresistibly attractive to Touma Kazusa, who was used to being alone.
She opened her mouth, wanting to say something, but found that her words had lost their power at this moment; in the end, she just stared at the gentle words on the screen and fell into a long silence.
The heart that had been tightly clenched by the prospect of a painful future seemed to have a tiny crack pried open, letting in a glimmer of light she had never imagined.
Ogiso Setsuna: "Yes, Kazusa-san."
Setsuna Ogiso: "I want to be your friend."
Ogiso Setsuna: "It's not the kind of complicated and awkward relationship where people are forced together because they both like the same person."
Ogiso Setsuna: "It's simply because you are 'Touma Kazusa' and I am 'Ogiso Setsuna.' We are true friends who appreciate each other, understand each other, and can support each other."
Setsuna Ogiso: "What I want is to be your friend for life."
"Friends for life?"
These words, as if imbued with magic, struck Touma Kazusa's heart heavily.
For her, who was used to being alone and building high walls with indifference and the piano, the word "friend" was a luxury in itself, let alone a heavy and long promise like "a lifetime".
She instinctively wanted to refute, to arm herself with her usual sarcasm, saying things like "Who wants to be your friend?" or "Stop talking to yourself."
But when the words came to his lips, he couldn't say them out.
Because in Ogiso Setsuna's words, there was not a trace of hypocrisy or pity, only a crystal-clear sincerity and warm expectation.
She could feel her heart, as if it were being soaked in warm water, softening little by little, uncontrollably.
The gap that had been pried open let in more light, giving her a strange warmth that made her feel somewhat panicked.
"woo"
A very soft sob escaped from her throat, almost imperceptible to herself.
She suddenly raised her hand to cover her mouth, only then realizing that her cheeks had started to burn and her ears had turned a distinct blush.
This physiological reaction was completely beyond her control, as if telling her that her inner defenses were crumbling.
Why are you saying all this to me?
"We didn't even know each other before joining the chat group, and 'we' had that kind of future."
She cried out silently in her heart, tinged with confusion; yet, another faint voice within her said, "But... 'friends for life'... doesn't sound so bad."
She longed to be understood, to be accepted, and to have a lasting and stable bond—this was her deepest, most genuine, and most unspoken desire.
And now, at her most confused and wary moment, someone bypassed all the complicated emotional entanglements, reached out to her directly, and made a promise of "a lifetime".
These words completely threw her into disarray.
Touma Kazusa looked at the messages in the chat group, opened her mouth slightly as if she wanted to say something, but didn't know what to say.
To accept? To refuse? Or to continue using indifference as a pretense?
Any response seems so difficult at this moment.
In the end, she simply lowered her head deeply, letting her bangs completely cover her burning cheeks and flickering eyes, and chose to remain silent.
But this silence was completely different from the anger and resistance before.
It was a silence that touched the softest part of the heart, a silence of bewilderment, shyness, and a hint of secret expectation.
Ogiso Setsuna watched Touma Kazusa remain silent for a long time, but showed no signs of urging or disappointment.
She seemed to be able to sense the emotions of Touma Kazusa on the other side of the screen.
She simply waited quietly, a gentle and tolerant smile on her face.
For someone like Touma Kazusa, time and patience are needed, and that's exactly what she has in abundance.
In the chat group, the other members also kept quiet, as if they did not want to disturb this delicate and important moment.
Is it just a feeling that unconsciously surfaced in their minds, or is it their delusion?
Why is there a strangely pink atmosphere between Setsuna Ogiso and Kazusa Touma?
"What I want is to be your friend for life."
This is a perfectly normal promise that friends would make, right?
(End of this chapter)












