Episode 25

Fernando's Pov

"Sir Fernando, Sir Fernando" I heard a voice yelling for me from my sleep. I groaned and cover my ears with pillows. "Sir Fernando it's 11am, are you...." I flutter my eyes open and sat up immediately without waiting to hear the remaining words. My gaze greeted Mr Pedro who was standing at my bed side and he gave a slight bow.

"Good morning, son".

"Good morning, father. Is it really 11am as you say?"

"Yes it is Sir- son, I mean son" he corrected himself when he saw me glaring at him.

"What happened this time around? Why am I waking up by this time? I didn't even hear my alarm". My head suddenly pounded when I raised my voice a little. "Arr" I grimaces and held it, "My head aches" I groaned.

"If I hadn't collected the bottle of whiskey you were having last night you would have been feeling worst than that".

"Did I get drunk last night?" I furrowed my brows in surprise.

"Obviously you did. I had to stop you from emptying the bottle at around 4am".

"4am? Please tell me I didn't blab anything stupid?" I requested and he sighs and shrugs.

"Well, I didn't think what you said was stupid because you said you meant it but I didn't really believe you. I had to wait till this morning to ask if you meant what you said".

"Really? Tell me what I said last night". I was really getting worried right now, what the hell did I say when I was drunk? Did I spilled out my pathetic past to him at my drunken state being?

"You talked about a girl you kissed. You said the kiss was a sweet one that ignited fireworks inside of you. According to you it was real, that the kiss was real and you felt it so deep-" he paused and glance at me, I was suddenly looking pale and feeling all sweaty, I had to get up from my bed and walked to the window. "But of course I didn't believe you, it was too strange to believe. Since I've been working for you you've never for once talked about a lady nor even invite any of the female gender to your house except for your mom. So how come you kissed a lady? Have you finally decided to have a woman in your life?".

"No! No! Not Fernando Perez!" I exclaimed avoiding gaze with him. "I love no woman, father. All what I said last night was out of intoxication".

"I thought so too, I mean not that you can't love a woman or share a kiss with her but it's too sudden, at least I want to see you two go for a date like most couples do and...."

"Please stop! It's never going to happen with someone like me. Love isn't in my agenda, so don't dream of a fairy tale life for me. Thanks for your concern but it's better you don't think about it. What I said last night is bygones, sometimes we say weird things when we're drunk" I cut him off.

"Very well then. I'll leave you to prepare for today's activity, I'll wait downstairs to drive you to the company whenever you're ready" he gave a slight bow and turns around to leave.

"I don't think think I'll be going to the office this morning. I need to go for a jog, perhaps when I'm back I'll prepare for work and I guess that will be by noon that I'll be ready for work".

"Okay boss, I'll be right here waiting" he replied and exited my room.

I need some air, is hot in here. I grabbed my grey joggers pants and my black hoodie paired with my black sneakers and put them on. I took my earpods, turned on my Bluetooth and I found myself jogging out on the street down to the road side. I really don't know how long I've been jogging but I kept jogging until I got to a park and flopped my body to the grass panting heavily for breath and flashback of last night came to mind.

I actually did say something about that kiss with Micaela to Pedro afterall, but I had to deny it in front of him because I was still unsure of what I'd felt during that kiss and besides is not worth talking about. I was just tensed when she kissed me, yes I was tensed that's why I felt that way. It's the first time of sharing a kiss with a woman, so is expected to have that awkward feeling.

"Hello handsome!" A woman's voice chirped beside me and I squint at her and sat up immediately. My gaze travels up her face and it made me wondered where she had appeared from all of a sudden. "Quit looking like you've seen a ghost, you should be glad a beauty queen like me is talking to you" she smiled and I raised a brow at her.

Beauty queen? Who told her she's beautiful? I focused on her face down to her body and I....well, she's not bad looking after all but that shouldn't make her hype herself you know. Staring at this lady sitting beside reminds me of someone, Micaela Alvarado. Weird imaginations of her sitting right next to me clouded my thoughts, and the thought of her soft lips lingering on mine sent different signals to my whole body.

No, no, no, this is just stupid! I can't be thinking of her right now, there's no way I'll let just one kiss to turn me into something else. Perhaps she's not the only lady that can send such signals to me, it could be something that happens when you kiss every lady. What if I try it with this lady? She could be the sign I need to forget about that one kiss I had with Micaela.

I locked gaze with the lady sitting beside me and she shrugs. I'm sure she's wondering why I'm staring at her like that without saying a word to her. I cupped her cheek and kissed her lips. Call it crazy but I did it, I wish I didn't do it but I did it even though it was forbidden for me to do that to myself.

I couldn't care less if it lasted a minute or just 30seconds, but all I knew was that I pulled away gritting my teeth bitterly. She was dumbfounded as she stared at me blankly in a gape. I shook my head at her and stood up hastily and vanished from her sight while I heard some cussed words behind me.

***

"Hey buddy, what's up? Why are you looking so perturbed?" Antonio asks as we sat in my living room. I'd call him over to my house after I'd left the park 30minutes ago. I was deeply confused and restless after I kissed that lady in the park. I don't need someone to tell me what I did to that stranger lady was really bad. I was meant to apologize for what I did but I only walked away.

"Perturbed is an understatement, if there's another suitable word that describes how I feel right now then you should use it instead" came my reply and Antonio snorted. To say the truth I'm more than perturbed, I'm lost and I need someone to find me and put me back to track.

"What happened buddy? Why are you sounding so serious? What went wrong when you went out for a jog this morning?"

"I kissed a lady" I answered irritatingly.

"Woah! Seriously?! Is that the new you now, you going around kissing ladies? First is with Micaela and now it's with some random lady? Who is next? And When did you become a Casanova?".

"Just stop it already Antonio, is not funny. I'm not a Casanova. You of all people should know I have no dealings with women".

"But yet you kissed two ladies within 48hours" he scoffed and glance around.

"I have my reasons!" I retorted and he raised a brow at me. "When you asked me yesterday about the kiss with Micaela I didn't give you an answer because I was still thinking it through".

"Yes that's right, I know sooner or later you'd tell me" he flashed me a smile and I scowled at him. "Sorry" he raised his hands in defeat.

"Yes, I did feel something like fireworks in my stomach and my heart throbbed faster when we kissed..."

"Yes! It is called butterflies, buddy! Or well you can call it whatever you like!" he exclaimed excitedly cutting me off and I shot him a cold glare that wiped off his excitement and I continued.

"I thought I was just tensed since it was my first time of engaging into a kiss with a lady but I was wrong. I decided to try it with a random lady that was wooing me at the park and when I did kissed her, I felt no butterflies or fireworks in my stomach. My heartbeat was normal and I wasn't even nervous. I got so confused and ran from the park to my house, and I had to call you down here to understand what is really happening to me. Why didn't I feel the same chills and fireworks in my stomach with this random lady like I did with Micaela?"

"That's love!" He answered grinning from ear to ear.

"What is love?" I furrowed at him confusedly.

"Love is when you met with Micaela Alvarado and you saved her life more than twice like some prince charming in a fairy tale and then you both shared a kiss that ignited fireworks inside the both of you and 'boom! there's a connection that causes you not to take your mind off her" he explains or more or less blabs. Yes, Antonio is blabbing, what he just explained is arrant nonsense.

"Antonio?"

"Yes brother".

"Can you always do me a favor and not answer some questions you're not sure of the answers? I'd prefer you say you don't know instead of giving me a wrong answer".

"Wh-at?? What do you even mean by that?" he asks with a frown.

"It means what you just explained to me about love is trash. Sorry if that came offensive" I said and he snorted.

"Buddy! Don't tell me you're trying to play dumb and also blind at the same time over this thing called love?"

"And I asks again, what is love? Because I don't understand how you summarize all I said about kissing two ladies that gave me different feelings to be love".

"Hold on a sec, what don't you understand? That your mind is clouded with a woman named Micaela Alvarado? Or that you're trying to deny what you felt all the times you spent with this woman while you were in Seoul and most especially the magical kiss you both shared?"

His question caught me off-guard and I stared blankly at him. Love? Did he say love? That's impossible! Love is not in my agenda, I can never love a woman, not after the trauma I went through because of them. Whatever I must have felt while I was with Micaela isn't real and cannot be real, perhaps I was just imagining myself feeling a tingling inside of me when it's just nervousness. Besides how do you love someone in just two days?

"That can't be love. I can never love a woman and you Antonio know it. Love isn't in my agenda, and it will never be. What I felt with Micaela was just nervousness and..."

"Why didn't you feel the same nervousness with the random lady you kissed this morning?" he interrupted and I stared at him quietly for a moment.

"Well, because it was the first time with Micaela and when it comes to the second lady, I wasn't nervous like the first time maybe because I am getting use to it. Like they say, there's always a first time to something and I guess that's what happened to me" I answered with a shrug and he snorted.

"Keep lying to yourself Fernando Perez. You might think you can deceive me, but do you know who you can't deceive? It's yourself!"

"I'm not deceiving myself, Antonio".

"Of course you are. In fact right now your eyes are betraying you".

"What do you even know about my eyes?" I grunted. I think I'm beginning to get pissed off right now. The reason for that is what I don't know.

"The truth is always so bitter and agitating, dear brother" he scoffed and that got me more agitated.

"What are you even saying?" I half-yelled exasperatingly and he shrugs in response.

Is it true I'm feeling agitated because all what he's saying is the truth or am I just being paranoid?.