Chapter 123 I WILL

FIRA'S POV

I came out from the bathroom with just my robe. Janus was sitting in front of the table, massaging his forehead while looking at the scroll. He was reading a checklist for the wedding.

I slowly walked towards him. I positioned myself at his back and I put pressure at his dorsal, massaging it. "Is that stressful?"

He looked up at me with a bright face. Gladness was written on it. He held my curves and then stood up. It was easy for me to seduce him because he was craving for my body for the past few days.

You can do it, Fira. Crap. It's just one night! For the baby!

I gasped for air when he lifted me up, slowly dragging me into the bed and laid me. He climbed on top of me while having a big smile. "Are you seducing me?"

"Is that what you think?" I fake a smile. The nervousness was rolling all over my body.

"The wedding is two days away. I can wait." He leaned his elbow at my side while touching the strand of my hair, putting it at the corner of my ear.

"I can't wait, Alpha." I enveloped my two thighs on his hips.

That was turning on him. He immediately gave me a hard kiss on the lips.

Ouch. It's like my lips are ripping because of his pushing harder.

It was just a kiss. What more if he conjugated my body? I could have miscarriage. Crap!

He touched my curves, his hands going up and down while untying my robe. I gasped for air when his lips went to my neck. I could see Pyro in my mind, the reason why the tears from my eyes welled up. I thought I could do this. I was faking my strength when in fact, I would die if another man owned me.

His kisses traveled to my breast. He was touching it in a way that Pyro did, but the difference was visible. He was not careful. Every move he did was reckless. It was uncomfortable. His hungriness was the first and last thing that I felt.

He successfully removed my robe and threw it to the side. I could see his dark eyes, staring at my body like a lion who was ready to attack his prey.

He held my waist. He lifted up my thighs on his shoulder and was about to enter when he looked at my face. He suddenly stopped. I was unaware that my sob was louder. My eyes were blurred due to the tears. My face was flooded by the liquid.

"Fira? It's not yet in. Why are you sobbing?"

I moved my head from left to right. "Nothing. I just...ahm in pain. You're...reckless and aggressive."

His mouth opened in surprise. He moved backward while shaking his head. "Am I?"

I nodded. I honestly admitted it. He would cause miscarriage to me if I forced myself to do this.

If I tell him? Would he accept?

I mean, he was not there during those days with Pyro. Maybe if he knew I could be relieved?

He went to the corner wall of the room and leaned his back. He was frustrated. He hit the back of his head on the wood. "Bastard! I am such a bastard!"

I moved as fast as I could. I put my robe on again and then went to him. When he tried to hit the wood again, I put my hand in the middle of the wooden wall and his head. "Stop that. It can hurt you."

"What happened to me?" He stared at my face. He cupped my cheek and glued our foreheads. "When I left you, I was not this man. Every time I see my reflection in the mirror, it's different."

I pinched his nose and gave him a small smile. "You're still that man. It's just you walk the wrong way, but you can come back to find the right road again."

"Can you help me?"

"Of course, I will." I stroked his hair. Janus was my crush in a Mining Area. I could imagine in my mind that we were there, laughing together.

I buried his face on my neck while hugging my hips. I was in front of him, my right knee was on the ground while embracing his neck.

"I keep your handkerchief anywhere I go," he whispered in my ear.

"You didn't wash it?" I chuckled as I joked.

He chuckled back. "Not yet."

My eyes widened when he held my thigh and lower back. He gently laid me on the bed. I thought that he was done by his desire, but I was wrong. I confirmed that he wanted me when his lips went to my ear and licked it. I gasped for air, my chest was filled with nervousness.

His hands started to be naughty, playing with my mound. I bit my lips. I was avoiding my hand to push him.

One night. It's just a minute. I can bear this. I can give myself. I need to do this.

I started to cry again when I felt that he was positioning that thing to my middle. I held his shoulder. I was unaware that my nail was buried on his shoulder. The liquid from my eyes streamed to my face.

My mind was filled with Pyro. Our moments together. Those laughter, the intimacy. Everything that made me fall in love with him over and over again.

Even if Janus can own my body. He can't own my heart. Pyro is living inside it.

He held my thighs and tried to be gentle by putting it into his hips. His touch was giving me tension, not relaxation. Unlike when it was Pyro's hand, the current was overflowing, the butterflies could be felt. Janus' hands were strange to me.

Think, Fira. Think...that he is Pyro. He is the Alpha King of Fire.

I managed to hold myself back from kicking him. "Please...be careful." My voice was low as the tears rolled to my side. "Please, don't hurt me."

Janus went up and kissed my forehead. "I will."