A Selfish Decision

He took in a sharp breath, “She died as soon as she gave birth to you.”

“You are my heir now, and the pups you are carrying with Kai are the future heir to my pack. I am old, and I need your help.”

“Help? Why would you seek help now? I was busy fighting all my life, suffering and surviving each day, believing that anytime I would die from hunger. Did you know how many lives I have seen lost, how many of the members died, and how my father died in front of me? All my suffering is nothing!”

“I am so sorry, I apologize sincerely, my daughter.”  Suddenly, he did the unthinkable. I had never heard of any alpha that bows at someone, other than this strange man who claims to be my true father.

His head was on the ground, his knee supporting his body as he look up at me, "My dear daughter if only I could return the past, I wouldn't have done it. There is no day that I don't regret doing that horrible thing,  promise to make it up to you while I still have the time. The moment

I knew that Aulus was killed by those damn twins, I knew that I have to get you back...and now you're here."

A single tear was shed from his eyes as he smiled bitterly, "I wouldn't blame you if you won't forgive me for what I did, but please, just give me a chance. Please accept me as your father and I'll try to make it right this time."

I didn’t know that a tear was on my cheeks that suddenly gushed down like a waterfall. I felt everything flashing back from me, all the hardships that I had felt, and strangely felt at home seeing this man in front of me.

So he was my father.

I still do not know how to react to this. If I should be happy that yes, my true father was not dead, he’s alive and he’s well, he’s alpha of a pack, or if I should get sad at how he abandoned me since I was a child, even letting my mom die. I could feel a hard lump in my throat forming, and I let the tears down like a waterfall.

He cleared his throat, I could see that he wanted to hug me, but I still have my protective wall around me, so I wouldn’t allow him to get near me.

He understood it so he nodded and stood up, “It must be hard information to take. Given the circumstances, I will let you on your own and think about it. Please rest, I do not want to stress you out.”  When he walked away, I left with my thoughts again.

Deep breaths, Arya. You had encountered a more dangerous situation than this, you can accept this.

I suddenly thought of Kai and Zef. I tried to mind link Kai, just in the hopes he might be nearby.

“I am in the White Claws pack.”

I keep on repeating in my head.

I didn’t know how many days passed by again as I let all of it pass by in a blink of an eye. My stay in the White claws was filled with me, sleeping for 12 hours a day, eating large portions of meat from Rem’s given trays, and then overthinking about how I could escape this.

But the deep inside part of me wanted to go around and explore the place.

If Alpha Leomored was really telling the truth and he is indeed my father, then this must have been the place that I should have grown up with.

No more hunger pains, no more deaths, no more fighting in the wild and always getting hunted and even discriminated against by my own kind.

I tried to imagine how life would be if I was born with that kind of privilege.  I felt a bit regretful that I couldn’t meet my mother. Out of everyone here, she must have been the one that experienced the worse. She was just a rogue, and he met my father the Alpha, she got pregnant by him, so she has to carry me in her stomach for months and have to hide me away from the world.

Also, I tried to recollect some memories from my late father, Aulus, the pack leader. I could have never guessed that he was my true father’s beta.

So that explains his insane strength and his being the leader….I am surv[rised he managed to lead us like that while having to hide me from the hunters. He has pushed away from the pack because they must have thought he got my rogue mother pregnant when it was just a cover for my alpha father.

How hard it must have been for him to have that kind of burden. If only I could see him again, I want to thank him from the bottom of my heart, I appreciate him, and I would always consider him as my father.

Suddenly, the door opened in between my thoughts, pulling me from my trance.

I could see it was the pack doctor who was looking at me with a gentle smile.

“How are you, Arya?” He asked, calling me by my name.

I just nodded, “Good.” I admit that since I wasn’t allowed to leave the room, I stayed rooted to the bed so I was able to gather energy and felt relaxed and better compared to the last time that I was in an inconstant fight or flight response.

He decided to run a few tests on me and put a new set of his herbal leave on my belly, patting some mint-scented gel, and sighed.

“What? How is my condition? Is it that serious?” I asked him, feeling that he was about to drop the news that I would be confused about.

He gulped, preparing me for his sad  news, “Your body has been stabilizing for a while now which is good but…” He trailed off, “I know this would be a hard decision but the pups eating your life force away.”

“What?” I gasped, “Y-You’re the healer, you must know some remedies how to fix that?”

He shook his head, “I could have done something if you were brought to me early on when it was in the early stages. But since they are getting larger, they needed to eat more nutrients, and your body is not supplying it that they resorted to eating some of your organs inside.”

I was frozen in shock at the news, wanting to know what more could I do but I knew it was hopeless…and there is only one thing that would solve this.

“So what are you suggesting to me?” I asked, holding my belly protectively.

“We need to stop the pregnancy. As soon as possible.”

I gulped, expecting that he would say that.

“And? After that?” I kept on asking but I know damn well his answer would be, I am just in the denial stage. I need to hear it from the healer himself.

“It’s either we end the pregnancy or the pups will end your life. Choose between the two.”

I closed my eyes, inhaling and relaxing so I would calm down.

Inhale, Arya… you can do it. I tried to calm my nerves but it wasn’t working.

I wanted ot let my frustration out and wild out here but knowing that would just make the situation worse pulled me back down.

The door opened and I could see my father, Alpha Leomord showing up. He seemed to hear my conversation with the pack healer as he suggested.

“My dear daughter, please think about it carefully before you decide.”

I smiled bitterly. So it's either I kill my pups or they will kill me?

Wow, they seem to have taken after their father.

But damn, once Kai knows of this, he would surely kill everyone in sight. I could feel his rage from here just by me being kidnapped, what more that he would learn about our pup's condition?

This won’t end well. I am afraid he would destroy my father’s pack.

“I don’t have any other choice, won’t I?” I asked for any hope but the pack healer just shook his head.

Alpha Leoomord, my father instantly grabbed my hand gently, “If you are going to choose, please choose yourself, my child, I need to prepare you for the throne, you need to stay alive. I don't want to lose you again like your mother.”