Chapter 45 THE QUESTION WITHOUT ANSWER

ANMELA'S POV

"What? What are you talking about?" Laurent scratched the back of his head. I found it adorable. Even if it was dim in our location, I could see the blushing of his ear.

"Ahm." I bit my lips.

Gosh, Anmela Eris! What are you telling him!

I was just listening to Alem's advice. I had no idea about having a boyfriend, how to make him happy all the time or how to make an effort for him. Most about love gestures and actions are foreign to me. I just heard that when the couple copulates, it will make the relationship stronger and they will not leave each other easily.

Maybe we should do that? I mean we did that thing, but not fully giving myself to him. He does not want to hurt me, but I am willing to endure the pain. It does not matter when it means that Laurent will be forever mine.

I shook my palm in front of my face. "Nothing. Ahm, can we...ahm, go home?"

"Why? Aren't you enjoying it here? We can change location if you want?"

"No, I'm enjoying it, but I think it's dark? We must go and take a rest?"

"We are not going home. We will spend the rest of our night here. Is that cool?"

My eyes widened. The happiness was obvious in my face. "Seriously?"

"Yes." He held my hand and pulled me to sit on the sediments. "I really want to spend the night with you, watching the sunset when the morning comes."

"Me, too!"

I saw him fixing a small cloth on the sediments. "Where did you get that?"

"I don't know. I just saw it on the table. Maybe my assistant put it in there."

He tapped his side. "You can lay here, Baby. You can have a great view of the stars and moon."

I followed him. I laid on the small clothes and hugged his thigh while he was sitting and looking up. "Lay beside me."

He gave me a small smile and put his back on the clothes. We both lying under the nice looking sky that is full of stars twinkling, glowing, joining our hearts to sway in gladness due to our bonded love.

Laurent moved in a side position. Instead of staring at the sky, he gazed at my face. "What are you looking at?'

"You are more alluring than the sky. You are more captivating than the stars. You are…" He moved closer to me, his nose touched mine. "You are my everything."

"You are my universe," I answered back.

After the throwing of sweet lines, our faces collided like how our lips did. We kissed under the beautiful scenery of the night.

I did not notice that he went on top of me and kissed me in the most gentle, romantic, sweet way. I gave all my best to sustain the crawling of the sensation that started to burn inside me. His lips were soft, delight and addicting.

I am addicted to his touch, especially on his handsome heart shaped red lips.

His kiss went to my upper lip and then moved down to my lower lips. He did that for a second and then I started to feel his tongue, going inside of my mouth. I happily accepted it. We played at each other's mouths. We were both panting, but we did not stop.

My hand went to his back, moving up and down. I could feel the hardness of his skin on that. Maybe because he had masculine body.

I unconsciously held the end of his shirt and removed it. His compactly well formed muscular body exposed in front of me, but that did not stop the kissing. It went deeper and deeper until his lips went to my neck. I closed my eyes to feel its softness. He traveled with a small smack and caressed it into sipping smoothly.

"Laurent, don't put red marks." Despite the gasping air, I still managed to speak to him.

"I didn't. I swear."

I yanked his hair at the back of his head when his lips landed on my clothed mountains. I could feel his prohibition to touch it or lift my shirt.

I heard him sigh and just rest his face on my chest and hugged me so tight.

"Why did you stop?"

"I don't want to hurt you."

That word again. What is the meaning of that? He is always saying that when we are in this situation. Of course, he might hurt me, but that pain is the lovely pain that I will feel. I am sure that if he chooses to take me, I will give in. That is how I love him.

"I will be fine, Baby. Don't worry about me." I stroke his hair in a sweet way. He had close eyes, but I knew that he was listening to me.

"Yeah, I know. But...I don't want to take advantage." He opened his eyes, adjusted his body up and buried his face on my neck.

"I want to give you my whole world. I will never doubt," I said with full of purity and sincerity. I was just telling what was in my heart.

"That's the problem. I'm scared that if you give your world to me, I can't take care of it properly. I'm afraid to break you because you are all that matters to me. If you get hurt, that's triple kill here." He brought his hand on his chest. "I love you more than myself."

"Love means taking and giving sincerely, wholeheartedly to the person we love and that is what I am doing." I could feel the tear welled up in the corner of my eyes.

Why am I like this? A little bit heart warming and I almost cry in an instant?

"You have the wrong thoughts, Baby. You should save for yourself. Don't give it all because it might not pay in return."

"Aren't you going to give it back?"

The silence filled the place. All I could hear was the hit of the waves of the ocean and the harsh air blowing throughout the place.

"I want...I always want." I could hear his sniff, which means he was preventing the heavy emotion. "Please don't ask me that question, I have…" He paused and looked down, "no answer."

I could not avoid the tears that crawled to the side of my face. I felt its hotness.

"What are you saying?" I burst out crying and I did not mind if he was seeing my vulnerability. "Don't you love me the way I love you? Or you love me, but that is…" I cleared my throat, my sobs started to be loud. "Or your love is just shallow?"