Chapter 59 ANOTHER PAIN

ANMELA'S POV

I laughed watching them. They were drunk. I was also dizzy, my vision was spinning. "Ardent, Alem, I'll sit down. I'm dizzy."

Ardent took me to the chair. In a few seconds, he said he was going to the bathroom.

I leaned my back on the soft chair there. I closed my eyes. I almost fell asleep when I felt a touch on my cheek.

Laurent...

I opened my eyes quickly, all I saw were the chaotic people, dancing and having fun. It was crazy that I thought that he was still here even though he really was not. I just closed my eyes again, I felt someone looking at me. I opened my eyes a second time, looked around.

There is no Laurent, Anmela! Accept it or you will lose your mind!

"Is there anything wrong?"Ardent asked when he came back. He sat next to me and drank the glass of liquor that he grabbed from the table.

"I don't know. I think I'm going crazy?"

The sound of his laughter filled my ear. "It looks like that."

"I'm not joking." I frowned. "I'm feeling weird. I can see something—I mean someone."

"It's just an imagination," Ardent held my hand and then we took Alem from the dance floor.

"Let's go home," he said while Alem was still struggling from his hold because she still wanted to dance.

Alem was mad at Ardent. We had work for tomorrow so we just managed the time. We walked out of the bar and then delivered Alem home.

"Bye!" Alem waved her hand as she walked towards the front yard of their house. I just waved my hand, too.

After a minutes of traveling, we arrived in my apartment.

"I will sleep here, Anm." Ardent fixed the sofa chair, he tapped it to ease the dust.

He usualy slept here in my apartment because they were afraid that I might commit suicide.

If he was not here, Alem would have slept in my room. They were exchanging duties to look for me.

They are true friends.

"Thank you for always being here for me." I sat on the sofa next to him. I smiled and then opened my arms to hug him.

"Great. Now I noticed it?" He laughed as if that was my first time saying thank you to him.

"Why? I am seeing you all the time. Why shouldn't I notice it?"

"I never left you, Anmela. I have never planned to. If I will…" He averted his look at me as if he was shy, "court you? Would you give me a chance?"

I was stunned by his question. I don't know the answer because I just think of him as a friend, a reliable friend at all times.

"Ahm—" I searched for an answer, but I got nothing.

"Maybe it'll change by this."

I was just surprised when he pulled me closer to him and slammed our lips together.

Laurent...

That was the content of my mind so I pushed him.

"Oh!" Ardent tugged at his hair and washed his own hand over his face. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I'm drunk, sorry, sorry, Anmela, I'm really sorry."

I just stared at him. Maybe he was just drunk so I understand that. I can forgive him because I know that sometimes alcohol is really strong.

"I'm really sorry, Anmela, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to so—"

"It's okay." I moved my head from up and down two times.

"I'm really sorry." He kept repeating that. I could see the sincerity in his eyes.

"Go to sleep. Goodnight."

I turned my back on him and entered the room. I sat behind the door and cried. I almost kissed back because Laurent is the one I remember.

How long will I feel this pain?

I am very tired. I am very weak.

I was always looking for his presence. I was almost crazy thinking that someone was always following me and when I gazed at it, I could see nothing.

I still hope that one day he will come back because my love for him will not stop. No day that he was not in my mind. did not get tired of crying if the reason was him. I loved him without a doubt and now that I was hurting because of our break up.

I don’t care. What matters is my love for that Baider man.

He is the only one who owns my heart.

Come back, baby boy, please.

Laurent…please. I'm begging you.

*********

As the weeks went by, I felt a little better. I could smile even though I knew that I was incomplete. I still think about him, but when I was overthinking I just focused on my work or sometimes watching movies.

I just finished cleaning my body when someone knocked on the door.

Maybe Alem or Ardent.

I opened it and I was shocked when Ardent fell on my shoulder. He was so drunk. I grabbed his arm, wrapped it to my shoulder, and guided him to walk towards the sofa.

"Hey!" I patted his cheek. "Why did you drink so much?"

He opened his eyes and then smiled at me with his tipsy eyes. His face was blushing. He touched my cheek and then caressed it into a gentle move.

"You're beautiful, I've been dreaming of you for a long time. I'm stupid for hoping that one day, you're gonna love. I wish I had never met Laurent."

My eyes were glued on him, I was observing every emotion that was written on his face. There was sadness and pain, mixing together that caused his eyes to twinkle due to the tears that were starting to well up.

"I love you so much…" His head moved down. The tears began to crawl down to his face. "Laurent, Laurent, Laurent! When will be the time that you can call me? Can I hear Ardent, Ardent, Ardent!"

I thought I was getting okay, but suddenly my chest ached again. All the pain went back. My irritating tears flowed again but I wiped them away immediately.

"What!" His voice was a bit high. "If you choose to love, you'll never experience the pain now."

I had never seen Ardent cry before. I felt sorry for seeing the liquid in his eyes now and that was because of me.

I tried to ignore him. I just took a towel, went to the sink and poured it with water.

"You thought it was easy for me to see you like this? If it hurts you it hurts me more!" He continued. I just listen to what he says.

I could not quite imagine that this was what he was going through. I don't know because I really considered him a friend from the beginning.

"Take off your shirt," I ordered him.