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GEORGIA

✿

Legs waving wildly. Arms rowing wildly through the water. A body that nevertheless sank into the depths without anything being done about it. The pressure that rose. breath escaping. A cry for help made only of air bubbles. That's what death felt like - even if you didn't experience it first hand. He changed us in many ways. He was there in one fell swoop, without warning. No one could have been prepared for this moment. There was no guide telling you what to do in such situations. It just happened. And there was nothing you could do about it.

That was the world we lived in. A perpetual cycle of life and death, as Arya would call it. And we all had to deal with it, no matter what scars it left.

But what if we could have prevented it? What if we could have turned fate differently, but didn't?

I breathed in the fresh, cool autumn air and enjoyed the light breeze that blew through my night-black hair as I walked through the dense undergrowth of the coniferous forest. Twigs crackled under my pretty, high-heeled booties, branches brushed my body and the soft hoot of an owl filled the night. All of this reminded me that I was no longer underground, hidden deep in the dark cells of the underworld.

My heart clenched at the memory. No, the tight bonds of my former imprisonment in the deep dungeons of Hades' underworld were broken and the fate of my life lay in my hands for the first time. Never again would anyone humiliate me so badly, break me so badly. I had sworn that promise to myself the moment Zaira freed me and all the other healer werewolves from the Underworld three solar orbits ago. And I did everything I could to keep that promise. I only wish she had come two laps earlier. Then this terrible night might have gone differently. just maybe .

The loud bass was the first clue that let me know that Isaac's late grandfather's cabin was nearby. It was the perfect place to host late-night parties like this, for it was on the edge of the Moonwater packing compound, right on a loophole from the hour-long patrols, and thus mostly secret from the watchful eyes of the werewolf soldiers. And I turned out to be right, because only a few minutes later I spotted the big stone house with the pretty little porch.

I adjusted my black tight dress and retouched my red lipstick before climbing the porch steps. I had only come across the miracle of make-up at the last solar orbit, when the prom of the then newly recruited soldiers was taking place, and since then I had never wanted to do without it. I loved it. The many variations on how I could make my face look, how I could play with it. It was just fun for me, as well as dressing nicely. My hands clutched the fabric as I thought of how dark and gloomy it had been in the caves of the underworld. How cold and gray; nothing had radiated life. Nothing had brought me joy, everything was just monotonous, desolate and promised undisguised pain. I closed my eyes and squeezed them tight to keep the demons at bay. I wasn't that girl anymore, periodically rocking back and forth in fear and loneliness, withdrawn to the farthest corner of my cell. No, my life looked different now. Full of colors - full of possibilities. Full oflife .

The door jerked open and I was abruptly catapulted back into the here and now. I blinked.

"Georgie! I was wondering when you were coming!' With a bright smile and sky-blue skirt flapping, Blair ran over to me and gave me a big hug, spilling the drink in her hand.

All gloomy thoughts vanished in one fell swoop and I laughed and hugged her back. Blair was adorable. Bright blue eyes, a small snub nose and a funny, sweet character whose quick wit was mostly hidden behind modest clothing. Her heart was pure gold, perfectly good. She was the first to come up to me after I was accepted into the Moonwater pack and gave me a warm hug, determined to be my best friend.

'I came as quickly as I could. Had an extra training session with Arya.” I told her laughing as I hugged her back.

Blair squeezed me tight, then pulled away from me. She rolled her eyes, but the smile stayed on her lips - she just knew how much I loved the hours with Arya. "Just training in your head, what am I supposed to do with you?"

"Maybe give me one of those drinks, too?" Because I smelled Blair's little flag and noticed her slightly clumsy footsteps as well. Grinning, I hooked my arm into hers and we ran up the stairs together. My sweet friend was in the same daily soldier training group as I was that all senior Gamma Werewolves were required to attend. The only difference was that she actually had the scent of a higher rank in the Gamma order, while I was more of a subservient Gamma wolf female, much lower in the pack rank than she. Nonetheless, I was in her class. Allowing me into senior year had been a delicate decision, and more than one of the beta officers had objected to disregarding the pack's wolf hierarchy,

So the fact that I didn't want to stick to my rank was a thorn in the side of some. A werewolf in particular . A small growl escaped me as I remembered how Beau had refused to let me train. And that without knowing how much Hades had really broken me. If he ever knew how deeply Hades had damaged me, he would never let me fight.

My stomach clenched. Beau would never know my secret, I would see to that. Besides, I made a promise to myself that night. And I would do anything not to break it. Even if that meant rebelling against hierarchy and a certain werewolf.

I wagged my eyebrows. "You know I'm always up for a joke."

Now she was grinning too. Oh yeah, we've thrown a lot of parties like this and had a lot of fun. And we got off scot-free every time. "Is correct. Man, you wouldn't believe how much Heather and Kaylee have been drinking. Before I smelled you, they were dancing on the counter."

I laughed. Heather and Kaylee were unbeatable in their art of getting as close as possible as quickly as possible while doing the most legendary things - so fun was inevitable. Then, with a conspiratorial sideways glance, I asked her, "Is Tiam there yet?"

Her cheeks immediately turned red and she bit her lip. "Its possible."

My mouth twisted into a mischievous grin. tiam . Young Gamma Soldier, scenting a future Beta; the absolute heartthrob so. Also, lately he had his eye on my somewhat shy, kind-hearted friend Blair, who he was very fond of. I'd catch her accidentally glancing over at him during our practice sessions just as the boys were taking their shirts off when they were too hot. I wagged my eyebrows. "Well, if that's the case, let's get the bottle rolling."

"Oh no! No more spin the bottle.” Blair objected, raising his hand, stopping me from opening the door with a shake of his head. She looked at me meaningfully. "Besides, Isaac is here, too." It was her turn to grin. "He's already asked about you."

I chuckled and rolled my eyes, smiling. 'Oh come on, how many times more Blair. Isaac and I are just friends.”

“Aaaaaaaah.” She drew out the word and her grin widened as if she wouldn't buy that fact for a minute. "Georgie, come on, Isaac's into you!"

I sighed because yes, Blair was right. I wasn't blind or dumb as a kid, I knew Isaac was interested in me. But Isaac was just ... well Isaac . My friend, who I could trust implicitly, was always nice to me and, along with Blair, was the first person to take me under his wing to introduce me to pack life. But even if I liked him, reallyliked, wasn't there anymore. There was no tingling when he looked at me, there were no butterflies that flew wildly when he touched me, when his lips touched mine. I felt comfortable around him, yes he was sweet and funny and would never hurt me. But we would also never become more than good friends who occasionally had something to do with each other.

'Why don't you want to try it with him? Who knows,' Blair shrugged, 'he might be the one. After all, you will soon make 18 solar orbits. Isaac may well turn out to be your mate.”

"Hmm..." I doubted that. How could Isaac be my mate if I didn't feel anything for him? He didn't dress me up, not like anyone else. As if I needed nothing more than himthinking, my heart beat a beat faster. Oh no, my feelings for Isaac were mere breath compared to that one werewolf. Those midnight green eyes, that clenched jaw and that deep, husky voice that always had a hint of anger in it. A certain beta wolf who wouldn't let anyone get too close, and yet I'd peeked behind the angry mask before and seen a softer side of him for a whiff of a second. I wanted to break this wall in two. I wanted to see if there was more; more of this man hiding behind his icy layer. Find out more about this wolf who didn't let me forget for a minute that he didn't think I was a soldier.

Blair was already reaching for the doorknob when I cut her off. "Who is here?"

"Just our pack, like always," she assured me. "Isaac and Tiam sent the invitations under secret, as usual."

I nodded and calmed myself down. No one outside of my pack would see me, everything was normal – so don't panic Georgie . My red-painted fingernails flashed as I gripped the doorknob. "Then let's go inside."

Cheers, laughter and loud music greeted us as soon as we entered the large stone house. There was dancing, cups and goblets with strong-smelling liquid passed around and I would say that the majority of my pack mates were already hail-proof.

Blair was leading me through the tightly packed and dancing crowd as I smiled and hugged everyone who greeted me when an arm suddenly wrapped around me.

"Hey, Georgie." Isaac pulled me to his side and handed me a mug. "Here for you."

"Thank you." I accepted the drink and smiled over the rim at him as I took a sip. I closed my eyes in relish as the alcohol left a warm trail in my throat.

Isaacs winked at me and pulled me a little closer. "Always, my dear."

I laughed at the stupid nickname as he steered me and Blair across the room to our regular couch.

'Well, truth, deed or drink. Blair asked loudly over the music when we were all seated.

"It's truth, action, or risk , sweetie," corrected Tiam teasingly. As casual as ever, he sat in the armchair and, like all four of us, held one of those mugs that was filled with some strong alcoholic beverage. His brown hair stood up in all directions, which didn't detract from his good looks in the least. He was the Casanova of our year, as was Isaac, who shared the couch with me.

Blair, sitting across from me and Isaac, rolled her eyes and tossed her pretty strawberry blonde hair over her shoulders. “I take truth. Who's asking me what?'

Isaac, who had taken a long gulp of his drink, laughed. "Come on, not again! You always take truth.”

I crossed my legs and playfully nudged Isaac in the side. "Oh, and now that's a crime, isn't it?"

"No it is not. I'm going to ask her a question,” Tiam said, and then leaned forward, closer to her, with a wicked smile. "Tell me, sweet Blair, what is it that you desire most?" One corner of his mouth lifted a little more. "Or who ?"

You'd have to be color blind not to see the dark discoloration on my friend's cheeks, but she managed to keep her eyes on him and faced him boldly. "Well, that I'll be on the list tomorrow, of course."

As if by pressing a button, my stomach knotted and a nervous tingling buzzed through my body. The list . All four of us were in the same year, trained together in the same group and tomorrow would get along who would be admitted to the final examination from our year.

Calmly, Tiam leaned back in the chair while my feet swayed restlessly back and forth. 'We'll all be into it anyway. Why worry needlessly?'

"Of course," agreed Isaac Tiam calmly, toasting us all loudly with his mug.

I returned the gesture, but my throat was tight. I didn't miss Blair's sensitive look, which she gave me briefly. She knew exactly how much I dreaded tomorrow. Of course Tiam, Blair and Isaac would be admitted to the senior year, after all they were three of the best of the year. But to say that it affected me as well would be an absolute lie. I wasn't the best in our year by far. While I'd made a lot of progress in the last three orbits of the sun here in the Moonwater Pack, and I'd gotten better every day I spent with Arya, I was still miles behind all the Moonwater werewolves who'd been at nothing since childhood other than running and hunting in open country. In comparison, if you only knew your own four cell walls, there was a lot to catch up on. So no, I wasn'tlogical on the list. Still, I wouldn't give up—this one terrible night couldn't be allowed to happen again. No more.

"Oh, that's my favorite song!" Blair exclaimed, snapping me out of my thoughts. Swaying and full of vigour, she stood up and staggered slightly, causing Tiam to almost jump up and support her.

With a satisfied expression, he said, "Well then, let's shake a leg."

Blair, looking like she'd had a drink or two too many and looked slightly flushed as she leaned into Tiam to let him lead me onto the dance floor.

Isaac, not noticing my tension, dropped his arm onto my shoulders and rubbed my bare upper arm up and down. With a lazy smile, he leaned closer to me and whispered, "Here we are alone again."

My red lips curled into a smile and I turned to face him, our lips almost touching. "And what does that mean?"

"Hm, I don't know..." He pressed his muscular thigh against mine and his hazel eyes shone. "You tell me, love."

A soft laugh escaped me and I shook my head. "I don't know, Isaac..."

“Why?” His fingers trailed up my upper arm, drawing little circles on my shoulder.

I hesitated. Isaac and I didn't always get along. Most of the time we only shared more intimate pleasures when we both had been drinking heavily or felt a strong need to do so. But otherwise we remained friends, especially when it came to the public. I shook off his fingers but gave him a warm look. "You know our deal."

He shrugged his shoulders. "We could change that."

I almost choked on the drink as I sipped it. I looked at him with wide eyes. "Isaac, I don't know what-"

“Who said we couldn't add some new rules. Or abolish old ones,” he objected, his eyes never leaving me.

I put my hand on his forearm to take the edge off my next words as my heart pounded fast against my chest. Isaac was my friend, I didn't want to hurt him. "Listen, Isaac, we-" I stopped abruptly in mid-sentence, scenting something. "Who...?"

Everything about Isaac tensed and he cursed. "Oh damn!"

"Isaac, who's coming?" My pulse quickened as I smelled the scent of strange packmates. "You said only our pack would be here."

"I don't know." Isaac ran a hand through his hair, stressed. "Wait, I'll take care of that."

He was about to get up when I tightened my grip on his arm and held him back. My fingers dug into his skin. "Isaac!" I eyed him intently and spoke softly but clearly, unable to help the slight shrill undertone in my voice. "No one can see me here."

His expression turned serious. "I know. That won't happen either, I promise.” With that, he stood up and was about to punch his way through the crowd when the door slammed open.

The loud level that had prevailed in the hut fell silent for a moment, until all my pack members greeted the new arrivals with great joy and welcomed them. They were girls from the adjacent Riverfall pack.

Then the music was cranked up again and the party easily got back into full swing. Everyone seemed to think nothing of it, everyone except me.

Isaac turned to me with a contrite expression on his face and looked concerned. “Sorry shit Georgie, but I didn't know they were coming. Otherwise I would have told you straight away!'

Oh, holy moon goddess . "Shit!" I jumped to my feet, pushing my way through the crowd with my head down.

"Wait, Georgie!" Isaac called after me, but I ignored him. Ah, what a mess! Crap, crap, crap! I kept my eyes down all the time, trying to maneuver my way through the people as best I could, but I didn't succeed too well. I was jostled, an elbow dug into my left side and a goblet spilled down my back. But none of that mattered to me as long as no one looked into my eyes and saw the blunt truth held in them. Otherwise I would betray my entire family. again .

The murky memories were already surfacing, and with them the everlasting, painful feeling of guilt. But I hastily slapped her aside, blinking away the tears that were rising.

Everything would be fine. Not so bad, Georgie. Calm down.

Taking a deep breath, I kept my focus on the floor and pushed through all the sweaty bodies when I heard her. Every single word of it. And all my worries were wiped away in one fell swoop.

"Rate them from one to ten." It came from one of the Riverfall girls.

"Oh my god, how is that even supposed to work?! They all look so hot!” replied another.

“Man, I wish I was born in the Moonwater pack too. Then I could look at these hot officers every day.”

I just rolled my eyes at that answer as I kept trying to make a way to the door.

“I swear to you, every time I see one of them at the border, my mouth almost waters. Especially at Hawkings.”

I frowned and growled at someone who spilled another drink on me. Real Hawkings? Well, I had to admit, the senior gamma officer who oversaw the training of soldiers wasn't bad looking. But the fact that all the girls in my group couldn't take their amorous looks away from him and the drool was almost running out of their mouths made Hawkings completely unattractive to me.

"Sam!" one of the girls exclaimed.

"What, he's got an incredible body and he's funny too!" defended the girl named Sam. “Well, who do you find to bite? What about Beau?”

Without stopping my reaction, my head snapped up and I stared at her through the crowd. Pretty blond hair, a slim figure and a beautiful face. A growl made its way up my throat.

"Oh Holy Mother Moon, that's like a ten!" She fanned herself.

'He's handsome, but,' Sam shook himself, 'I almost pee my pants around him. One look from that and I'd crawl away."

"She's right." The black-haired grimaced. “Beau may be hot, but have you seen him before? His wolf is almost always on the surface. He's far too aggressive, in my opinion, I'd much prefer Xenos."

My hands clenched into fists, but maybe they weren't so wrong after all. Beau was dark, dangerous, and very irritable. It would be best if you gave him a wide berth. Still, not a day went by that I didn't remember it; to the night of the prom of the last sun orbit. I'd been in the pack for one sun orbit when I plucked up the courage to ask him to take me to prom. Of course I knew I was only seventeen and Beau much older - but that hadn't stopped me. I might have been young, but I was long past childhood and teenage years. Growing up in a prison full of torture, one quickly learns

That night Beau wasn't harsh, nor was he angry. Almost gently he brushed a strand of my hair away from my face and touched my cheek briefly - before he disappeared into the forest. It was one of those rare moments that I kept like treasures inside.

"Just make sure you don't say that in front of Arya or you'll run out of eyes," Blondie said.

I blinked and turned back to the door, which I had almost reached when it suddenly flew open with a loud crash.

The conversations stopped immediately and everyone stared at the three dark silhouettes in the doorway.

"The party's over!" Hawkings yelled. "Now finally turn off that damn music!"

It was like the whole room was holding its breath. My heart was racing and blood was pounding in my ears. Oh man, I was so done. Still with my head down, I didn't move an inch. Now only prayer would help. Praying I wouldn't be spotted and could sneak away quietly.

But puff cake, that wish was shattered the moment I heard a dark, angry growl that gave way to a growl and froze. Oh no...

Slowly, very slowly, I lifted my head just enough to look up and that's when I saw him. He stood there, legs apart, his hands clenched into fists and his expression twisted into an angry grimace. But that wasn't what made my blood run cold. It was his look. His piercing gaze, which was aimed directly at me .