Chapter 24
“FEEL better now?” Caroline asked Benjamin’s daughter, Antonette.
Antonette was lying on her stomach on the couch, eyes squeezed shut. “Not really,” she said with a slight grimace. “I know what I’m experiencing. You don’t have to be here.”
“Antonette stop that—”
“It’s okay, Benjamin,” Caroline touched his arm. “It’s just her hormones,” she said and chuckled.
“Hormones? Why?” Anastacia asked, her eyes were still moistened with tears.
Caroline turned to Anastacia.”We, girls, get too emotional, upset and irritated every time we have menstruation,” she explained. “Sometimes, it’s because of dysmenorrhea, but most of the time, it’s because of PMS.”
A line appeared between Anastacia’s brows. “PMS? What’s that?”
“It’s a condition that most women experience during their menstrual period. It’s called Premenstrual Syndrome,” Caroline said and tapped Anastacia’s cheeks. “It’s kinda hard and sometimes could prevent us from doing our daily routine.”
Anastacia’s eye widened. “I don’t want to have menstruation.”
Antonette snorted. “As if you can choose. All girls will have it when they reach puberty. And, you’re next, Anastacia. It’s a curse for being a woman.”
Anastacia clung to Caroline’s arm. “Tita Caroline, will you be here when I get my period too?”
“Yes, of course. I will take care of you,” she said and smiled at Anastacia.
Benjamin looked away when Caroline turned to him. He wasn’t aware that he’s been studying Caroline’s expression while she’s talking to his kids softly and patiently. She was still the Caroline that she knew back in their high school days. But did she remember him? Benjamin doubted it.
Benjamin shook his head. He shouldn’t be thinking about it now. His firstborn child just got her first monthly period, and he doesn’t know what to do. But, thanks to Caroline’s presence, everything will be alright.
“Benjamin, you must stock a lot of sanitary pads. Usually, menstruation lasted in five to seven days,” she told him. “Do you have an idea of what to buy?”
Benjamin doesn’t know what to answer. He didn’t see Camille buy her own pads when they’re going to the grocery together. Or, if he did, maybe he just didn’t notice.
“Uh, their mom used to buy the ones in violet packs…” he said hesitantly.
Caroline chuckled. “I guess we should include the use of each sanitary pads on the things that I’ll teach you.”
“You should go to the supermarket with him, Tita Caroline,” Anastacia suggested. “I’ll stay here with Antonette.”
“You don’t have to, Anastacia. I can stand up—“ Antonette stiffened in her seat and grabbed her stomach. “It hurts…”
Caroline dashed to her daughter’s side and help her lie down again. “It will pass soon, Antonette. Just stay still for a while.” She looked at him. “Benjamin, can you please prepare a hot compress? It can help to lessen the pain in her navel.”
“Stay away,” Antonette said, irritably. “I don’t need—”
“Antonette Anne!” Benjamin shouted. He can’t believe that Antonette could be this rude to Caroline. “Who taught you to be like that?”
Antonette ignored him. She turned her back to Caroline and lie down on her own.
“Caroline, I’m sorry,” he said to Caroline, but she didn't look at him, her gaze was focused on the ground.
“It’s okay,” Caroline murmured, still not looking up. “PMS can affect one's behavior.”
*
“I HOPE you wouldn’t get tired of understanding Antonette’s attitude,” Benjamin told her apologetically.
Caroline forced a smile in her face as she looked up to met Benjamin’s gaze. “It’s okay, Benjamin. I know where she’s coming.”
Benjamin knotted his forehead. “What do you mean that you know?”
Caroline stopped on pushing their grocery cart. She looked away and think of an excuse for the unmindful words that slipped out in her lips. “What I mean is, I know how she felt because I have monthly periods too.”
“Oh, right,” Benjamin replied. “I really don’t know what I’m going to do when I saw those bloodstains on her shorts. I’m not expecting it, she’s just twelve years old.”
Caroline looked at him. “You may stop worrying now, Benjamin. I will help you cope up with girly things.”
Benjamin chuckled, but get serious after a moment. “I hope Antonette’s attitude wouldn’t discourage you, Caroline. She became like that after their Mom’s death.”
Caroline touched his hand on the cart. The sadness shadowed his handsome face. “I’m sorry to hear that, Benjamin.”
He smiled bitterly. “It’s been five years since the plane crash flooded the news. Our telephone kept on ringing during that time, but I wasn’t at home. It was Antonette who answered the call and the first person that heard the tragic news.”
Caroline covered her mouth in shock. “Antonette was just seven years old back then. The caller shouldn’t tell that kind of news to a child—”
Benjamin shook his head. “The way Antonette speak doesn’t sound like a seven-year-old kid. The informer was also shocked when he found out that he relayed such a sensitive message to a kid.”
Caroline’s chest tightened. “She’s traumatized,” she said in a trembling voice. “Did they attend counseling?”
He nodded. “Anastacia was the first to cope up. But, Antonette, she has her own healing process.” His voice started to quiver. “And I don’t know until when.”
She squeezed his hand. “Benjamin, be strong. You’re all that they have,” she whispered.
“I know…” he said, but his voice didn’t succeed to hide the uncertainty. “I can’t be weak because I’m their father. And, they held on to me…” He heaved a sigh as his beautiful pair of marble eyes focused on her. “But, you know what, Caroline? I can’t help it sometimes.”
Caroline’s tears started to stream down her cheeks. She can feel his struggles, and it hurt her to see him suffer. “I’m just here, Benjamin. I’ll never leave your side.”
His forehead creased. “But, Caroline, you shouldn’t be doing this—”
“No, butts, Benjamin. Stop thinking about your pride now. Think about your kids, they’re both girls. Do you think their mom wanted them to see staying in your coffee shop in times like this?” she said and held his stare. “Benjamin, I know that your wife will also agree with me if she’s here—”
“No,” he said with a stern voice. “None of these will happen if Camille is here…”
It hurt Caroline, but she needed to keep on pushing him if this is the only way that could make him open his heart again, not just for her, but also for the new possibilities. She has to free him from his cage of sorrow and bring back the colors in his life. She has to save him.
“But, she’s dead, Benjamin. Accept that and learn to live outside your wife’s shadows. There is still life around you, Benjamin. Antonette and Anastacia need you.” She reached to touch his cheek. “And I need you, too.”
***
