22
Back at the hotel, Gage was hating who he was even more. He went into the dark hotel room feeling emptier than the weeks after he found his ex-wife in bed with another man. The woman he devoted his life to laughing at him as he begged Summer to reconsider. All he ever wanted was to have a family with a wife and kids. After his divorce, he vowed to never fall in love again.
Gage slammed the hotel room door shut in a fit of rage, almost breaking it off the hinges. He had been weak, allowing Isis to open his heart again. He was letting her in, and it was going to destroy him all over again. He couldn’t go back to being the same pathetic man he once was. Summer used the same loving nature he once prided himself on against him over and over. His divorce only proved to him he had been less than a man by letting his softer side go free. He would not allow himself to be weak.
With a loud growl, he threw a chair against the mirror on the wall, shattering it.
“Fine! If that is what she wants. If she thinks I’m just out for her body. That I am incapable of loving anyone — I’ll fucking show her!”
Jacob heard the commotion through his hotel room wall. He stepped into the hall and knocked at the door. “Gage. Buddy? Are you okay there?”
Isis stepped out of the hotel room on the other side, next to Gage’s room, and blinked up at Jacob with bloodshot eyes. He could see something had upset her again.
“Go away, Jacob!” Gage yelled.
Another bang hit the wall, making Isis jump from the loud crash against the door.
“Isis, sweetie. Why don’t you come over to my room? Let’s chat. Let him get this out. It’s been coming for a while now.” Jacob led her to his room. “Sit. You want to tell me about what is going on with you and Gage?”
“Jacob, it’s nothing. The usual. He thinks he owns me. I will not allow any man to control me like that.”
“All right. I understand that, and you shouldn’t. I don’t think you understand his idea of the submission he keeps talking about. It’s not about controlling you in the ways you think.”
“What do you mean?”
“Gage’s divorce and whole marriage were hard on him. He took a lot of crap from day one until the day they split. Summer was very overbearing for their whole marriage. She told him what to do and say, every second of the day. She cheated on him more times than he wanted to admit. Until he saw it firsthand, he wouldn’t let himself believe it. He was a family man who tried to make his marriage work. He’s not the guy you see now. He was a caring man who just wanted a family.”
“I want to believe that. I do. I just don’t understand why he wants to be so controlling all the time.”
Taking a deep breath, he looked up at the ceiling as if searching for the answers to explain his friends’ behavior.
“Isis, every woman he meets wants to tame him, until you. They use him for money and fame. He wants a woman who will let him be a man again. Summer killed any masculinity he had left when they were together. She used him to get her five minutes of fame and spent his money. After taking everything, she discarded him like yesterday’s trash. Summer never loved him the way he loved her. He changed a lot after the divorce. I think he just didn’t want to be controlled like that again. He’s an Alpha male, and he lets his pride get the best of him sometimes.”
“Wraith told me she cheated. He never said she was that bad. I didn’t know.”
“Few people do. I’m one of the few he told about what happened. I believe it was even worse than he says. Maybe even abusive on some level. If that’s the case, he has too much pride to admit to it. I promise you; he is a good man. He just has been acting a little crazy lately. Especially since you came around. You fight him with every breath. From day one you appeared combative. Once he got to know you, he saw you were a kind-hearted person, except for him.”
Isis sighed. “I don’t enjoy fighting with him. From day one he has been rude or bossy.”
“I agree. At first, it was a test to see if you would let him oversee things at work without second-guessing him. Then it became personal. I think he has feelings for you. It’s probably confusing since he swore he would never fall in love again. You’re not like most women in our line of work. You think and feel more deeply than any woman he has ever known. Sweetheart, you’re changing him for the better. You may not see that, but it’s true.”
“I doubt that. He is always so angry with me. I think sometimes he wishes I were never born.”
“When you are not around, I see him slowly becoming the Gage I always respected. All of us get caught up in the Justice faction idea of fame and money. Except for you. When you go off that stage, the sweet shy girl who has her nose in a book comes right back. You don’t let fame get to you. I know you don’t see it, but we’re still the same down-to-earth guys we always were before all this. I think Gage craves a simpler life, and he sees what he always wanted in you,” Jacob tried to make her understand.
“So, what? I’m supposed to say, yes sir, Mister Stone. Whatever you say, Mister Stone. Is that right?” She looked annoyed as her foot began tapping on the floor.
Jacob rubbed his head while pouring them both a drink from the minibar. Handing it to her, he sighed.
“Kid. He doesn’t want a puppet. Gage loves a powerful woman but also wants someone he can take care of. He wants to feel needed. That’s what most men want. Summer never was like that. She had to be in control all the time, even telling him how to dress and act. She treated him like a walking-talking credit card instead of a husband. He just wants to know if he can trust you and that you’re on his side.”
“I understand that. I just don’t know what all this has to do with me. Why can’t he just tell me how he feels? If he feels anything at all.”
“Well, Gage felt lost in his marriage. He gave so much and received so little in return. If you want to show him you care, let him take the lead. Why he feels the need to be the way he is with you, I don’t know.”
“Jacob, he treats me like I should bow to him,” she noted. “He is bossy and domineering. I just wanted to learn from you all and his attitude ruined it. I know I’m not as good as the group and I worry I will pull the Justice team down.”
“To be frank, I didn’t like his actions toward you since day one. I called Gage on it a few times. I think he’s hard on you because he sees a brilliant talent that’s being wasted. You don’t see the talent in yourself and look for everyone else’s approval. He tells me he would give you that title shot, but you don’t believe in yourself as we do. We all know you have little confidence in yourself. But, sweetie, you should. You got more talent than over half that female roster. You just need to believe in yourself. Gage does like your costumes. He just thinks you hide behind them, and he hates seeing you hide.”
“He’s probably right. But the sexual innuendo? One second he is being flirty and pushing himself on me. The next he has some bimbo in his lap, letting her grind all over him. It’s sick.” She cringed, thinking about it.
“He doesn’t take them back to the hotels. Never has. He keeps the private stuff to a relationship. I know a little thing that Gage is into, though. He told me a while back in confidence. Hearing what he says to you, I think maybe it might have something to do with it. This information never goes beyond this room. Agreed? You honestly can’t tell anyone. Ever. I shouldn’t even tell you this.”
“Okay, if it helps me understand him more, I’ll keep it to myself. Jacob, I would never betray your trust. You have been so nice to me. Everyone thinks you’re a womanizing asshole. Truth is, you’re a big ol’ softy. If it weren’t for you convincing me to stay, I would have left IWX forever by now.” Isis drank from her glass.
“Here it is. He... well... he has certain... sexual desires.”
“Desires? What do you mean?” she questioned.
“As I said, he’s an Alpha male. His relationship with Summer was stifling his urges. Even in the bedroom. Gage has a fetish, I guess you would say. He likes to be in control, in and out of the bedroom. Understand?” Jacob tried to explain without being blunt.
“Like BDSM stuff. Weird bondage? My cousin Holly said he’s a Dom... dominate? Scary stuff like that?” She looked shocked and intrigued.
“Not the extreme side of it. More on the softer elements, like blindfolds and light spanking. He’d be considered in that community as more of a pleasure Dom. Maybe more, but I don’t know for sure. I know he doesn’t like to hurt women. Even the way he talks to you has been bothering him. I’ve known him long enough to tell he feels horrible about it. This pissing match between you two has kept it going. He is not one to lose at anything. That’s why he’s the champ. He will fight you as long as you fight him.”
“Spanking? Has he done this to other women?”
Jacob lit up a cigar. “I didn’t ask. Maybe? He likes to pleasure women but likes to be dominant in it. He doesn’t like a woman to take charge all the time. He likes control, especially in bed. I think when he keeps saying stuff about being submissive, it’s because he’s sexually attracted to you. It’s not all about work or personality conflict. Gage means submissive in his bed too.”
Shifting his weight, he watched her expression, afraid to say too much. Somehow, the curious look she was giving seemed as if she was willing to listen, so he continued.
“Summer never allowed him to explore his urges. Even in bed, she likes to demasculinize men. That bitchy act on TV is every part of who she is. I’m glad Davis fired her. Isis, Gage is testing you to see if you will submit to him.”
“So… What? Does he have some weird sex room or something?”
She was intrigued, but a little freaked out. A small part of her was coming alive at the thought. Could he have the private life she craved? One she was always too shy to explore.
“Oh, no. It’s not all that extreme. Light kinks, probably. He told me that other stuff like choking is just nonsense and dangerous. He is just adventurous. He never got into details.”
“Well, that’s not so bad. Why wouldn’t she want that? I would think it would be sexy in a loving relationship to try new things. Don’t you think so?” It relieved her that he wasn’t extreme about it.
“I agree. Summer was more about diving into his wallet and fame than making the one she’s with happy. She wouldn’t even allow them to have a child in fear she would lose her perfect body through pregnancy.”
“That’s sad. I always wanted to be a mom one day. I always wanted lots of kids. That must have been hard.”
“It was. We tried to tell him she was using him, but he refused to admit it to himself. Gage was so over her abuse by the time he caught her, he felt a weight lifted off his shoulders. Anyway. I hope you understand him a little better now.”
“I do. I’ll try to not be such a bitch all the time. Thank you for the talk. I’m heading to bed.” She got up and hugged the older man before going to her room.
“Thanks, Jacob. I see why he looks up to you. You’re a good man.”
As Isis opened the hotel room door, another bang came from Gage’s room. He walked out holding his hand with blood dripping from his knuckles from hitting something. When he saw the concern in Isis’ eyes, he relaxed. Gage dropped his head in embarrassment and walked down the hall, looking more broken than anyone she had ever seen.
She looked at Jacob, who just patted her shoulder with understanding.
“He’ll be okay. Just give him time.”
