Chapter 14
CHAPTER 14
“We can’t . . . I can’t do this.”
Julian frowned. “Can’t do what exactly?”
“This whole thing . . .” she said and trailed off, pointing vaguely between the two of them. “Whatever happened last night . . . was a mistake, Julian. It can never happen again. I can’t let it. Both of us have very different priorities. So please, let’s just forget that anything ever happened last night and move on.”
“And what exactly happened last night?” Julian said a little too harshly, causing Sia to flinch. He wanted to apologize, but his pride was hurt badly. “We kissed, that’s it. It’s not as serious as you’re making it out to be.”
Sia had thought that Julian might respond in such way since he was known to pass from woman to woman without a backward glance. But what she felt was anything far from relief. Angry? Yes. Jealous? Yes. Disappointed? Hell, yes!
So, she clenched her hands by her side and faced Julian. “You’re right. I had a moment of weakness last night. It should never have happened.”
She watched as the anger dissipated from Julian’s electric blue eyes, only to be replaced by something she couldn’t quite put a finger on. But when those beautiful pink lips tilted up on one end in a devious smirk, she knew she was in trouble.
“You’re right, it shouldn’t have.” He took a step forward until their faces were mere centimeters apart. He was so close to her that he could smell the sweet cherry blossom scent of her shampoo, the sweetness of the strawberries on her lips. “It was a moment of weakness, and you needed my strength.” He lifted his hand and lightly tilted up her chin so he could see into the bright emerald of her eyes. “But I never implied it was anything more.”
Sia sucked in a breath, taking a whiff of Julian’s scent into her lungs. The scent of the lemon temporarily overwhelmed her senses before she got her bearings under control. “Julian, I . . .”
But nothing else came out. No matter how much she tried, she felt like she was drowning in the blue of his eyes and there was no one to save her. Sadly, she didn’t want to be saved.
“Remember this, Sia,” Julian spoke softly, but the words shook her to her core. “If I decide to take you, I won’t use your vulnerabilities against you. You’ll come to me of your own will, and it will happen soon. It’s clear in your eyes that you want me and the only reason I’m holding back is because I know you aren’t ready. But be prepared, Sia Milton, I know desire when I see it, and I won’t hold back next time.”
There was challenge in every word he spoke, and both he and Sia knew that it won’t be long before they acted on the attraction between them. And just to make his point clear, he flicked out his tongue and lightly ran it over Sia’s bottom lip, making her eyes widen in surprise. He let go of her chin and turned to walk away.
Sia leaned back against the table behind her as soon as Julian left the room. If it wasn’t for the piece of furniture, she’d have slid and sprawled on the floor by now. Her breathing was out of control, her heart was hammering in her chest, and her lips still tingled—at the point where Julian had licked her.
Licked her!
She lightly traced the spot with her fingers, while her other hand went to her stomach to calm the flock of butterflies going wild inside her. That had not been her plan! And yes, she had to admit, she had been the one to initiate the kiss, and damn her for that, but it had felt so good! She didn’t think she’d have the strength to live up to Julian’s standards. If this was her reaction to him merely licking her lips, then she didn’t think she’d last long in bed.
She shook her head. She couldn’t let such things happen. She was a mother, damn it! She had a thirteen, almost fourteen-year-old child. She couldn’t submit them to the humiliations of the media and the world. She just couldn’t no matter how much she wanted to run into his arms, and how much she wanted to feel his naked skin against hers. Sia was new to all of this, she realized. What she had experienced with Arthur wasn’t lovemaking or sex, it had been rape. He’d never asked for her consent or made her feel pleasure in any way. It had always been about his needs, his pleasure, and his satisfaction. And Sia had been too young, too scared to know who to ask for help. The only people who were supposed to protect her had wanted nothing to do with her after she had been married off. Her own mother had never cared, not even when she’d shown her the bruises during the short family gatherings Arthur had taken her to once or twice a year.
Sia didn’t want to relieve those days ever again. And even though she knew that Julian would never hurt her that way, not when every inch of him screamed protector, she knew there were other ways in which she could get hurt.
“I know that I’m just another new challenge for you, another new conquest,” she told no one in particular. “But I refuse to be another notch on your bedpost. I deserve better and besides . . . you’ll find someone better in your next mission.”
Harsh words, but Sia knew they were the truth.
* * *
Julian flinched at the insult.
He knew he shouldn’t be eavesdropping on Sia outside her door, but he couldn’t help himself. He’d finally said what he’d wanted to, and Sia hadn’t denied his claim. She desired him; at least that much he was sure about now.
It was true though, he thought. He had always been like that. If someone had it in them to refuse his charm, which had numbered to zero until now, he would just go after another woman on his next assignment. But that was before Sia, before she had made him feel things that he was capable of feeling. He’d be damned if he let her slip away.
“So, you think it’s just temporary? That I’ll just move on after my work here is done and jump into another girl’s bed?” he spoke to himself calmly, making sure no one in the house heard him, or that the sound didn’t carry through the door. “Fine then, I won’t pursue you anymore. But you’ll soon change your mind, Sia. That much, I can assure you.”
He didn’t know what had happened between Sia and her ex-husband, but he could only imagine the kind of hell Sia had had to endure during her four-year marriage to that bastard. He was determined to make sure that she never has to deal with that kind of torture again. And he knew, to some extent, what sexual abuse felt like. It was one of the reasons he wanted to become a bodyguard so he could protect people from abuse. He’d initially wanted to be in the military or the police force, but after Christian had gotten injured during a war in Afghanistan, his parents had straight out refused to let Julian join. They had died from a car crash shortly after and there was nothing he could do but to honor their wish.
“But—” Julian said, a determined look in his eyes, “I’ll make sure you never have to go through that ever again. I won’t let that sonofabitch close to you. I’ll never let you down, Sia, as long as I’m alive.”
With that in mind, Julian went to turn away from the door and go up to his room to follow up on Abhay’s call, but when he turned, his eyes widened in shock.
The only thing he could think of was Oh shit!
Because standing only a few feet away from him with a ginormous smirk on his face, was none other than Leonard Stone.
