Chapter 20 Word's I Couldn't Say

Serenity's POV

I sat in the ground behind the big tent of Cirque Funtasia, a book on my lap and the tiger, which I found the name is July, was cured behind me, by my feet, the lioness Lana slept.

I sighed as I turned to the next page of the book. They both turned to me and stared.

I returned their stare and sighed again.

"I'm ok, just..." I shrugged, "What am I doing here?" they stared at me as if saying that's what we want to know.

Then I remembered Eric's uncle's instruction that we'll be leaving for home in two days. The thought alone made me smile, and butterflies erupted in me.

I smiled at July, "I can't want to go home... to see my family." then I turned to Lana, "I wish I can take you with me, I really do. But you know I can't, not with all these messes."

I remembered what happened the other night at the Romanov mansion.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*flashback~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"I was wondering where you were, mother." the boy says.

"I'm just helping our guest," Aunt J says. "They seemed to have wandered in the mansion when no one welcomed them."

"Mother, they are far from being the guest." the boy shrugged, "They're with the circus, aren't they?"

"Well, yes. But still, this is our home," she says, "whoever we invite is a guest."

Aunt J hasn't changed a bit. She used to tell us whenever we would escape from the alpha boys who would spend the summers at the Royal house.

"I see." he says, "Well, for once, I think I agree with you."

I turned to him and caught him looking at me with a smile. He walked toward me and held out his hand.

"The Cirque do house such interesting people don't they?" he says as he reached for my hand and kissed my knuckles, "Beautiful."

I moved away a bit and pulled my hand back, "Thank you."

"Do you have a name?" he locks my eyes with him. I felt my brows furrow as I fail to look away.

"Serenity," I said in almost a whisper.

"Serenity." He repeats. I felt the hair on my nape stand as my name came out of his lips. "Perfect."

His smile widens, and that was all it took for me to look away. I turned to Cole and move to his side.

"These are my friends," I said.

"Shifters." The vampire says. "A perfect guard for a perfect lady."

"They are my friends." I corrected him.

"Of course, I'm sorry." he tipped his head sideward.

"A name for us to accept your apologies," Cole says.

"Oh, where are my manners? I'm sorry, I was just captivated by"

"Name," Cole repeats.

The boy gave him a look, obviously looking irritated but is trying hard not to show it.

"I am Vladimir Boris Anton Romanov," he says with a bow.

Cole snorted, "Boris?" he chuckled, "Next thing you'll tell me, you want us to address you as Anton since it's the only manly name you have."

"Serenity may address me as Anton, just as my family and friends do. You others may call me Lord Vladimir."

"Well, aren't you a little piece of sunshine?" Cole sneers, stepping up to him, but I tightened my hold on his arm.

"Cole," Tasha warned.

He and Anton exchanged glare a little too long for my liking until Aunt J cleared her throat, and Anton stepped back.

"Well, would the lovely lady let me escort her to the party?"

"No, you-"

"I'll be honored, Lord Vladimir." I stepped up,

"Serenity?"

I turned to Cole and gave him a calm look. Control your temper, or none of us will be able to get out of here.

He kept his glare on, "Keep your hands where I can see them." he says, "If my sister-"

"She isn't your sister, shifter." Anton laughed.

"I am what he says," I said. "I know no other family than him, so might as well have him as my overprotective brother."

"I see..." Anton says, "Very well, shall we milady?

I looked down at his extended hand and glanced at Aunt J, her face reflected of worry, just as I remembered.

I forced a smile and linked my hand on the crook of his elbow, "Of course."

He smiled and escorted me out of the room. I glanced behind at Cole.

Please stay near... I begged. He nodded and reached for Tasha, escorting her.

"So, Serenity, tell me..." he says as we walked through long dark halls of the Romanov castle. "How is a beautiful lady like yourself is living in the circus?"

"It isn't by choice. I'll tell you that." I said, "But, frankly, there is no place I'd rather be."

"Interesting..." he says, "As interesting as shifters living in a circus where animals like them are caged. It is a surprise they aren't caged as well."

I hear a low growl from behind us. Calm down, Cole. I warned.

"I wouldn't say that shifters can't be like animals," I said, "but like I said, it's just instinct that they have in common. They are still more human."

"I guess you would know." He says, giving me a knowing look.

Finally, we reached the end of the hall, where two men stood holding the door open for us.

I hear a gasp behind me as we walk through the door. It was like stepping into a dream, a fairy tale. An orchestra was set on a corner playing classical music, guests in victorian gowns were all over the room, dancing and talking.

I stop at the top of the stairs, stiff.

"What's wrong, Serenity?" I turn to Anton, surprised at how near he was.

I shook my head as I looked around again, "It's beautiful."

"I'm sure you are used to these kinds of things, princess." I try to step away from him, but he kept hold of my hand. "Now, now, calm down, Serenity. You wouldn't want them to attack you now, would you?"

I can feel my head lighten up, almost to the point of nausea. He was right. I am used to these kinds of things, but not like this. It was like time stopped. Almost everyone in that room is a vampire. A couple were humans who, I'm guessing, would be their dates' midnight snack.

"As long as you stay with me, you will not be harmed," he whispered.

"The same for my friends?" I asked, gathering all my confidence.

"If that will keep you from running away."

I gave a weak nod and let him walk me down the stairs.

I knew the shifters behind me were on guard, and I can feel Cole's anger from where I was.

"Dance with me, Serenity." Anton puts an arm around my waist and practically drags me to the dance floor.

The vampires we came across bowed and stepped aside, making way and space for us. The music stopped when we reached the middle of the room. Anton then made me face him and positioned me to dance with him.

As if on cue, music began.

I let him lead me to what seemed to be my dance of death.

"So stiff, princess, enjoy..." he whispers before twirling me and expertly caught me again. "I'm guessing you've never seen so many vamps in a room?"

I remained quiet, then he laughed.

"Or should I say that you have never seen a vamp before?"

For the spectators, it would look as if I was in a deep conversation with him, but I knew better than to give him any satisfaction of knowing that ignited an interest.

"It's a custom that a lady must make small talks during dance like this," he says.

"That isn't a Russian custom," I said.

"True," he says, "I've always loved the English customs, very sociable and intriguing... almost sensual."

I reached for his chest and pushed him back, "I hope I am not giving you such an impression, Lord Vladimir because that is one thing that I do not want."

He laughs and reached out for me again, but I stepped away.

"Then you should have never worn that gown," he whispered. He held my gaze again.

In an instant, I stiffened again and watched him as he steps up to me, taking my hand and wrapping an arm around my waist, and start to dance with me again.

"You are as appetizing as blood, princess." he whispers, "And seeing you were wearing the color of freshly drawn blood..." he groaned against my ears.

This time a memory of the night with Rham rushed through my mind, so I roughly pulled my hand away and pushed him away.

"I said stop it!" I snapped. I looked around and realized that we were the only ones on the dance floor, and my little scream got everyone's attention.

"Serenity!" I turned to see Tasha running toward me, Cole right beside her, angry.

Then I hear a loud growl at the end of the room. The people from the cirque have arrived, starting with the tamers.

I don't know if I should be thankful for their timing or not; with the angry growl that July gave out, I know I shouldn't be.

"Remember what I said, Serenity." Anton says, "You are only safe here if you are with me, one word I can have you killed."

"You will do no such thing, Anton."

I turned to see who the newcomer was, and my eyes fell on the most beautiful girl that I have ever seen. She'd probably be more beautiful if she takes off that scowl on her face.

"I told you..." she hissed, "I told you the moment you make a scene-"

"You'll kick me out, I know, I know..." Anton says.

She then turned to me and smiled, "I'm really sorry for whatever my idiot brother did." I nodded, then she stretched out her hand, "I am Svetlana Duscha Gelya Romanov."

I returned her smile, "You must be the celebrant."

She rolled her eyes, "At least one of us agrees." she says, stealing a glance at her brother. "What is your name, human?"

"Serenity," I say, "Serenity Grey."

At that short moment, I saw the change in her eyes which shifted to someone behind me. Then her eyes moved to my neck, I reached for my neck, holding unto my pendant in the process.

Then with a snap, she went back to her perky self, "Gelina..."

"I'm sorry?"

"Your name in Russian..." she pointed out, "Gelina." then she grinned, "Apparently, my brother had broken that peace now."

"Oh, come off it, Gelya," Anton says.

"You promised Anton." Gelya whined, "You promise, mother-"

"I know, now will you all, please just mind your business?" Anton gestures to the guests, who all turned their attention back to whatever they're doing.

"Now, can I please have her back?" Anton gestured toward me.

I moved away to him, and for some reason, I stepped nearer to Gelya.

"No." Gelya says, "I know you, Anton. Whether she is who she is or not, I would be heartless if I leave her to you."

"Well, guess what, Gelya," Anton smirks, "you are heartless."

Gelya shook her head and reached for my arm, "You are to stay away from her, or I swear I'll give those shifters a run for their money of who will kill you first."

"Gelya!" Aunt J warns.

"I'm sorry, mother, but he never learns and always breaks his promise," Gelya whined. "Father is not here, so there's no one to please Anton. So leave my guests alone."

"Again, she isn't a guest."

"Then she shouldn't be here," Cole says. He reached for me, and I walked up to him. "You have a lovely home, and we wish you a very happy birthday Lady Gelya, but I think it is best if we leave."

"I agree." Aunt J says.

"Of course you do," Anton whined.

"Thank you for inviting us, Lady Gelya." I said, "But I think my brother is right."

She sighed, "Great job scaring away my visitors Anton." Anton snorted and crossed his arm over his chest. "I'll show you out."

I nodded, and Anton was about to disagree when Gelya raised her hand to stop him. "Stay here and play as a little host that you are supposed to be, and leave the animals alone."

"Fine." he snaps, then he turned to me and smirked. "I'll see you soon, princess."

I felt an arm on my shoulder, looking behind me seeing Aunt J.

"Let Gelya see you out," she said.

I turned to Gelya, and she linked arm with me as if we have been long-time friends.

She walked us to the main door, not talking. She just kept glancing my way, smiling.

We finally reached outside, where the limo was waiting with the same driver.

"Thank you," I say to Gelya.

She shook her head, "You really don't remember me?"

I frowned, "I'm sorry... Should I...?"

She laughs, "You should ask your wolf." she says, "I'm pretty sure she'll remember."

Then she glanced at my necklace and reached for the pendant, brushing it with the tip of his finger.

"I know I will never forget you." she smiled and tapped my nose with the same finger.

"We should go," Tasha says.

Gelya nodded, "I'll see you soon, princess."

Tasha leads me to the car and left.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*end of flashback~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Quite frankly, I don't think I'd like to see any of them soon, not even Aunt J. Not when I was too near to get home.

No matter how much I want to know about Gelya.

The home was more intriguing right now.

"And what mess is that?"

I turned to see a man standing a few feet away from us.

"Well, aren't you a tease?" he says.

I frowned, "I'm sorry, but I don't think you are allowed to be here."

He chuckled, "Your land, your laws, right?" he starts to walk nearer. "You shifters are so selfish."

With the word shifter, I had my alert up.

Cole! I called through our link.

Lana and July gave a low growl, a warning.

"Oh, you meant because of the animals." he says, "I'm touched for your concern." the two stood up.

"Lana, July, calm down," I said. The two did as told but still had their guards up.

"And now you can even control the animals." he gave me an impressed look, "Your power never ceases to amaze me."

I now stood between Lana and July,

"For the record, you are the strongest of all the daughters that I have met." he continued. "Probably the most powerful one."

"Who are you?" I demanded.

He points a finger at me, smirking. "That right there and your selfishness is what started this war between our kind."

"A vampire..." I said in almost a whisper.

"Bingo." he says, "When my son said that you were in the neighborhood, I told myself I definitely have to see you again. And god," he sighed, acting breathless and reaching for his heart. "You are as beautiful as I remembered."

"I am Demyan Uriah Romanov." he bowed, just like Anton did. "But I think you know me by Yuri as your father loved to call me."

I frowned. Yuri... I thought. then I gasped. "The vampire king."

"So he has mentioned me," he said, amused.

I stepped back and away from him.

"Hey, hey... where are you going?" he asked.

"Please, I don't want any mess," I begged. "We have not done anything against your kind-"

"Calm down..." he says with a laugh, "I just want to see you."

"See me?" I asked.

"Yeah, just like I said."

"Well," I said, trying to gather all my courage. "You've seen me, and you can go."

"Is that how you speak with your supposed enemies' king?" he asked, "Do I need to remind you again of the war and the fighting."

"I am not my brother," I said.

"I know, but you are the daughter-"

"I believe the girl said you could leave." I hear Cole say behind me. "Seeing that you found your way here by yourself, I'm pretty sure you can find your way out."

Yuri nodded and looked back at me, "It is nice to see you again, princess."

I gave no response of any kind until he left.

"You ok?" I hear Cole ask.

"Yes." I forced myself to smile, "Thank you."

"I think you would be safer in Tasha's trailer."

I nodded and helped him walk Lana and July back to their cages and myself in Tasha's trailer, where she continued to teach me some of her craft, which I think Cole regretted as Tasha insisted on making a target out of him, worse, a guinea pig. That, until Jim called Tasha to open up her tent and start doing her job, angered Cole more, saying that he would love to rip Jim’s head off.

“You do know that she isn’t really reading their future, right?” he said.

“What do you mean?”

He shrugged, “You know how she calls her ability a gift?” I nodded, “Well, she treats it as a gift. She never uses it when she wants to be paid. Unless she sees that they deserve to know something in their future, and it’s pretty amazing when she does it….”

I smiled, watching him smile as he talks.

“You know, you should tell her,” I said.

He gave me a confused look. “What?”

“You should tell her…” he raised a brow, still confused. I rolled my eyes, “Tasha?”

This time he was completely caught off guard. “W- what?”

“You like her, don’t you?” I asked.

He looks away, “Shut up.”

I stifled a laugh, “That’s really cute, Cole.”

“I said shut up.”

“Oh c’mon…” I gave him a small push, “the way you talk and look at her. It's just cute.”

“I said-“

“Is she your mate?” I cut him off.

He frowned and walked ahead.

“Cole, wait!”

“Go away.”

“C’mon Cole…” I whined and caught up with him. “She has to be your mate.”

“No, she isn’t,” he mumbled.

“Oh…” I said.

“It doesn’t matter cause I don’t have plans of meeting it either.”

“It?” I asked.

“Mate.” He shrugged.

“Oh…” I frowned, “Do you mind if I ask-“

He stopped and faced me. “Cause my ass of a mom broke my dad when she left him.” he snapped, “In fact, he was broken so much that he just stared at the hunters and let them kill our pack and my sister!”

I stepped back away from him.

“Do you know how painful it is to see that person you admire be broken by the person you trusted the most?” he says, “Be fooled and betrayed by the person he considered as his life?”

I frowned, remembering Eric, how father had tried to push him away from me, how hunters had kept me away from him, and now the vampire. I stopped and looked down at my feet.

“I do know what it feels like to be away from him,” I said in almost a whisper.

I hear Cole stop and looked back. “Serenity…”

I forced a smile, “I know it isn’t the same as what you are saying, and it probably feels different for your mate as well.” I paused, thinking carefully of what to say, “But pain is inevitable. No relationship is free of pain. Whether it was deliberate or not, one way or another, someone is going to get hurt. Your mom hurt your dad when she left but did you ever thought of why she did? I know Eric is in much pain as I am, maybe worse after what that….” I closed my eyes and pushed away from the memory of Rham. “But at least I’m trying to get back to him. But you…” I shrugged and looked up at him, “you’ve given up without even trying.”

He stared at me, his face stoic.

“You’ve given up on her without knowing if she will hurt you.”

“Cause I know she will-“

“You aren’t the only one who has a say on this, Cole!” I snapped, losing my patience. “She is as much as part of this story.”

“A story meant for tragedy!”

“And it is a tragedy that is meant to happen!” I said, walking up to him. “Do you think that I want this? That I want to be a princess or the daughter of the moon?” he met my glare with his own, “I will pay with my life to have what you have, Cole.”

“What?! A life that is meant for the dogs?”

I shook my head, looking at him with pity, “A life of freedom, Cole.” I said, “I’d always prefer to be a free dog any day than be where I am now.”

“You say that cause you have everything.”

“And look what I have to pay to have everything.”

With that said, I turned and left him.