Chapter 95

Mia

Reluctantly I turned to look at him, more than a little afraid.

“Why do you bring up the subject?” he asked.

I blinked. Shit! Why was he asking me this? Wasn’t it obvious I cared about Aria? That I cared about him? That I was head over heels in love with him and I wanted to be more than just his mistress? That I wanted to be more than just a friend to Aria?

“Because I care about Aria,” I said, looking into his eyes. I wanted to tell him I meant what I said, that there was no hidden agenda.

His face still a hard mask, he asked, “Why do you care about Aria?”

I furrowed my brow. God, did he really need me to spell out each word and explain its meaning?

“Because I love her, James; that’s why. She’s such a sweet child, and she’s your daughter. Granted, I’ve never been with children before, but with Aria, I feel we just kind of click.”

Like it clicks when I’m with you, I wanted to say.

“I care about her a lot, James. I’m worried Sophie is hurting her like…”

“Like?” He probed.

I sighed and reluctantly said, “Like the way my aunt and uncle used to hurt me. It’s not nice, James. It hurt and scarred. It breaks you and drags you down. The scars, they don’t go away. It haunts you at night and…”

I took in a deep breath, feeling tears brewing in my eyes. “And…it’s painful, those nightmares… Those memories…”

Suddenly I felt my body being pulled forward, and I found myself burying my face against the side of James’ neck. I was in James’ arms, I realized, and I took full advantage of it. I just didn’t care at that moment if Aria saw us in such an intimate embrace. I needed to be in James’ arms. I wanted to be in James’ arms, and nothing else mattered.

I sniffed and inhaled his manly scent, which calmed the turmoil that erupted within me.

“You’ve been through a lot, haven’t you?” he asked softly.

I had no idea how this came to be. I thought we were talking about Aria and Sophie. So how did it turn out like this? Me blurting out my past? Me being consoled by James?

Nonetheless, I didn’t care and took advantage. It was nice in James’ comforting arms, being pampered by him. He made me feel safe. He made me feel I was of worth, like I was one of a kind and important.

“Feel like telling me about it?” he asked gently. “I’m all ears.”

I shuddered involuntarily at his kind offer and lightly chuckled with joy. I’d been waiting for this moment, hadn’t I? I’d been wanting to tell someone, anyone, I could trust. And here was James, like a knight in shining armor, presenting himself to me in such an unconventional way.

I wrapped my arms around him and nodded eagerly. Then I began my tale, telling him of how my wonderful parents had died during a car accident when I’d been twelve, of how Andy and I were severely injured. This was followed by our new home with Uncle Herbert and Aunt Miley, which began our teenage years of being bullied and molested. I recited how Uncle Herbert had sexually assaulted Andy and me, how he’d whip us with his belt, how he and his wife would verbally bully us, which ultimately planted some very dark scars inside us.

I told him when I was seventeen, I took Andy with me and ran away, thus ending that torturous life. I still had nightmares of the car accident, and sometimes I dreamed of Uncle Herbert coming to me at night and doing all sorts of disgusting things to me, like torturing me and whipping me. That sometimes he’d go too far and end up killing me, which scared me witless.

By the time I had finished, I was crying like a baby, tears streaming down my cheeks. God, I couldn’t believe this was happening, that I was telling James about my dark past, that I was in his arms and crying my heart out.

“Shh…” James comforted me, his hands stroking my back, which helped ease my painful thoughts of my past and fears of the unknown future. I was still scared that one day Uncle Herbert would eventually find me and…

I didn’t want to think about it and blanked my mind at the possibility.

James kissed my forehead gently and said, “You’re safe with me, Mia. Nothing is going to hurt you again, not your aunt, not your uncle, not anyone. I promise.”

I looked into his eyes and saw the sincerity there. I knew he meant what he said because he was James, and James never went back on his word where I was concerned. I knew he’d keep me safe, that he’d annihilate anyone who would dare to hurt me or anyone I cared about. Hadn’t I seen it already when Andy had been kidnapped by the Mexican?

I felt my heart glow with affection and nodded my head. Then I couldn’t help myself and raised my face to his in an offering. I wanted him to kiss me, because to me, that intimate act was like a seal to our promise, an oath of sorts of him keeping me safe and bound to him.

James lowered his face toward me and was about to kiss me when Aria’s voice interrupted us.

“What ya doing, Daddy?”

I hastily pulled back and hid my face against James’ chest, feeling totally embarrassed, as if I’d just been caught red-handed doing something very wicked.

I wiped tears from my eyes and cheeks before the little girl could see me in such a disheveled state.

“Mia?” Aria queried tentatively.

I could feel her adorable face close to mine as I was doing my utmost to hide from her. The little girl wouldn’t let me off the hook and even went so far as to draw my attention by touching my cheek with her small hand.

“Mia? Why are you hiding your face against Daddy’s chest?” she asked curiously.

James, meanwhile, chuckled wholeheartedly and pulled his daughter into his arms too. When I lifted my head, Aria was in front of me, sitting on her father’s lap opposite me.

“My two darlings in my arms,” James said. “I’m the luckiest man alive.”

Aria giggled and said, “That’s what Susie’s daddy said when he had Susie and her mommy in his arms.”

I sniffed and asked, “Who’s Susie, Aria?”

Aria wrapped her small arms around her father’s neck and said to me, “Susie is my friend. You haven’t met her yet, but you will when I bring her around for a playdate next weekend.” She turned to her father again. “Isn’t that right, Daddy? ’Cause Susie is allowed to come around for a playdate next weekend?”

Once James nodded in confirmation, Aria once again turned her undivided attention to me. She looked at me closely and then cocked her head to one side as she asked, “Are you crying, Mia?” She said to her father. “Daddy, did you make Mia cry? You’re naughty. What if she hates you and runs away? Then you can’t kiss her like Susie’s daddy kisses her mommy, and that’d be sad. You’ll be sad, won’t you, Daddy? ’Cause I know I’ll be.”

James didn’t answer his daughter’s many demanding questions. He simply chuckled with amusement.

I blinked, more than a little confused as to what Aria was going on about, this friend of hers named Susie and Susie’s mom and dad. I wondered what they had to do with James and me for that matter.

“James didn’t make me cry, Aria,” I said, which drew the little girl’s attention to me again. “I was just thinking about my own mom and dad and my past, that’s all, and it made me sad.”

The little girl looked at me for a moment, as if trying to understand my situation, which I knew she couldn’t because she was so young.

“Well…” she began. “If your mommy and daddy and your past makes you sad and cry, then why do you think about them? Why don’t you stop thinking about them? That way you’ll be happier, right?”

I simply stared at her, dumbfounded. Gosh, Aria was smart for a six-year-old girl. She grabbed the bull right by the horns. There was no point in thinking about the past when it hurt you so bad.

I chuckled and said, “You’re right, Aria. And you’re so smart.” In which case, she beamed at her father delightfully.

Thinking this was as good a chance as any, I changed the topic completely and asked the little girl, “Aria? Do you like Sophie?”