Chapter 24

I could only mope about my disastrous first day at actual work. It was evening and still no sign of Nikitaa or the interview happening. The channel honchos insisted on getting the interview done today anyhow. Mansi tried her best but nothing worked in her favour. Arjun informed me about the channel's investment in this film and hence their insistence on finishing this interview on time. They were hoping to do some damage control.

"Where do you stay?" Mansi asked me while we were heading towards the car.

"Duncan Road."

"Do you need to be dropped anywhere?"

"Uhh..." I hesitated a bit but told her that dropping me at Goregaon or Andheri station would be a good help.

"If you can wait for a bit I can drop you. Arjun has to go for another shoot so the office car will be at his disposal."

"If I manage to get a rick I would make a move," I told her candidly.

"Sure suit yourself, anything is fine."

I couldn't get a rickshaw driver to agree to drop me at Goregaon or Andheri. They were looking for a long-distance customer which I clearly wasn't. Hence, I was stuck with Mansi. She was glued to her phone and I was busy taking in too many sights around me.

It seemed like it would rain and I decided to wait no longer. I frantically beseeched the rickshaw drivers but they did not budge. Bua must be waiting. The mall expedition was still fresh in her mind and I could not give her another reason to kick me out. I dialled bua and informed her about the weather and no rickshaws. She was extremely nervous and scared but asked me to come as soon as possible. It is not a safe place to venture at nights, she pronounced many times to heighten my fright.

A rickshaw driver took pity and agreed to drop me at Andheri Station but at twice the rate of the normal fare. I agreed albeit reluctantly. There were only some things that I could fight against and Mumbai's monsoon was totally not a war I intended to ever win in this city.

As I sat in the rickshaw I saw Mansi's car arriving. I recognized the man sitting behind the wheel. I avoided making eye contact with him and asked the rickshaw driver to move out fast.

I was miserable the moment I saw them together. How could I develop feelings for a man I had hardly interacted with? To steer away from my thoughts, I looked on the road to gaze at the darkness outside and not within me. The torrents of rain brought respite to the parched earth, but there was none for the agony that I had brought upon myself knowingly. I was getting entangled.

My nagging to the rickshaw driver to drive faster drove him to an edge. In his frustration, he pulled the gear so hard that we ended up with a mean machine that refused to budge.

How did Jigar tolerate my whining and sarcastic barbs for years? I was an insensitive bitch to him. I took my phone out of my pocket and dialled him. He was no more the favourite person in my call history. I called that infuriating man again and again until he picked up my phone. When he did, I only had abuses to rain on him.

"Where the fuck were you? I have dialled almost a hundred times." I spoke in a language and tone that was alien to my ears.

"Hold your tongue, girl. Is it for real?" The laughter and mockery were evident. "Mumbai has changed my innocent friend. Where the hell is the prude, who refused to abuse anyone for any reason?

"Fuck you!" Out came another explicit and it made him chuckle.

"I wish I could." He teased me.

"Fuck you, you moron." I poured out my angry tirade while the rickshaw driver looked at me in horror. The girl begging him a few minutes back, requesting him politely was possessed. My choice of abuses was rather limited and did not affect Jigar. He found the entire situation comical if anything else.

"I need you, man. Here. Right. Now." I was howling. The tears of anguish outpoured from nowhere. It was failure, a bad day, tiredness and Agam, a heady cocktail of emotions felt that tumbled out together and made me seek Jigar and his comfort. I let go of my pretences and finally accepted that things were not a bed of roses as imagined.

Jigar quietly heard me, breathing harshly. The rickshaw driver stopped and turned to inform me that the rickshaw had broken down in the middle of the road. I got off and cried relentlessly. I let myself get drenched completely. I was soaking wet in the rain and was past caring about things that didn't matter.

Jigar was upset but masked his concern well. His words weren't caustic but soothing.

"Abhi, get a grip. I know I am not good at chanting positivity but I want you to stay strong. Is there something I can do for you? I am always with you. Not there physically but there for you. Tell me the problem and I will try my best to help."

In between the bouts of sobbing I managed to make myself heard, "The problem is that there is no big a problem I cannot solve without breaking down. I am just tired, angry and missing my friend." I pouted and spoke with such sincerity that Jigar's heart warmed and the worry creased face lightened up.

"Where are you? I suppose it's raining very badly and you are right in the middle of the road getting drenched."

"Hmmm."

I looked at the rickshaw driver who sympathetically looked at me. I gave him a weak smile to let him know I was fine. I moved towards him to enquire about the rickshaw. It was beyond repair to be managed by him on his own. He needed a mechanic to help him.

"Will I get another rickshaw to go?" I asked.

He shook his head. It was raining cats pitchforks and the traffic on the road was thinning. The few cars I would see passing by, moved out of sight in speed. There was no rickshaw around.

I stood near the rickshaw driver. The incessant rain was making visibility poor. He was kind to not fend me off. He stood by me and instructed me that the area wasn't very safe at this hour and I should consider the first option available to go home. The deafening thunder was making matters worse and my fear of the unknown spiked my heartbeat.

The flashlight of an oncoming car was blinding. Moving at a fast pace, it slowed down as it came near us. The glass windows rolled down to show me the familiar face of a man who evoked unknown emotions within me. He didn't utter a word but the one sitting next to him asked me to hop in. I did as I was told without arguing.

"You're soaked. Tchh" Mansi said while Agam started the car.

We drove in comfortable silence and it was rather pleasant to not have any conversation. Agam kept himself busy with the steering wheel while Mansi kept stealing glances at him. It irked me to be in a private space with the two lovebirds but I was totally out of option. The rickshaw driver did not ask for money despite driving me a considerable distance.

My thoughts were interrupted by the constant honking of the cars and the traffic jam that lay ahead of us. Mansi sighed while I continued staring out of the window to see a choc a bloc and people trying various means to escape the clutches of the rain and the crawling traffic.

"Mumbai traffic," Agam muttered under his breath and punched his hand against the steering wheel.

"Where do I need to drop you?" Agam pointed the question at me while looking at me through the rearview mirror. The man was so impassive that he was getting on my nerves every passing minute.

Mansi answered for me thankfully and spared him the bitterness in my voice.

"Andheri Station."

"I don't think so that's possible looking at the traffic."

"Any nearest accessible station would be fine," I replied in a disinterested voice.

"Then Mahalakshmi should do." He decided for me. That was a long ride and surviving these two was a task.

"Are you sure Agam?" Mansi looked visibly upset having spoiled their long romantic drive in the monsoon.

"If you have a better option, please suggest." He snapped at her. Mansi squirmed in her seat while I turned my face away from them to pretend I did not hear a thing.

"We could drop her at Santacruz station, taking the ..."

"And risk getting stuck in the waterlogging," he countered her.

Why were they fighting over me? Mansi wanted me to be off and Agam wanted to avoid the traffic. I was stuck between the two with no voice.

"Can you drop me to the nearest spot from where I can get any convenient mode of transport to go back home?" I squeaked fearing an out lash from both of them.

"Chaar rasta is your safest bet to get something to reach Duncan Road."

"Okay." And off we continued with Mansi sulking more than before while trying to engage Agam in a conversation with little or no success. After a point, she resigned to her fate and engrossed herself in her mobile. Agam continued to drive straight, on a mission to end this agonizing journey as soon as possible. I texted Jigar and told him what a pain in my ass my seniors were.

I giggled uncontrollably at Jigar's double meaning jokes and my laughter reverberated through the car haunting me for the next few minutes as Agam and Mansi stared at me with pure hate. My ruse- well, I didn't invite myself for the ride.

It took us more than half an hour to get through one stretch. Meanwhile, Agam came out of his self-created misery and started talking to Mansi.

"I am not taking the Andheri Goregaon flyover, I am sure it will be in a bad state. If you don't mind I would take the longer route, but I am sure it would be nearly half as bad as this."

My opinion didn't matter from the very beginning, and I quietly sat as the third wheel in this awkward relationship.

Mansi simply nodded her head avoiding any confrontation. She requested Agam to drop her at a place (I did not hear the name clearly) and she would manage from there. He did not insist to drop her till her place. One hell of a sucker he was to his girl.

After an hour or so I felt a tired and throbbing pain in my entire body. To add to that was the chilly air of the air-conditioner in the car which was making me shiver uncontrollably. I had nothing to cover myself with. The fancy kurta I had taken pain to wear at work was totally soiled and by the end of the day, I had grown wiser as to what to wear on a shoot and whatnot.

I don't know what time it was because I had slept peacefully, hugging my arms and legs in an attempt to warm them. The two other passengers had no iota of thought that I was dying out of the cold. My sneezes landed on deaf ears until they became a regular affair and Agam noticed I was uncomfortable in the chilly air of the car. He switched off the AC for a while and rolled down the window to let the cool breeze and droplets of rain wash his face. With every passing sneeze, I felt the discomfort and the arrival of a cold that would show up with a bad fever.

By the time it was Mansi's turn to get off I couldn't point what made her happier, escaping the lousy company or that home was just around the corner. Agam gave her a forced smile and bid her goodbye.

"Come in front," Agam commanded me as soon as she was out of sight.

"I am fine," I replied as coolly as possible.

He turned around and raised his eyes. "I am not your personal chauffeur. Reminder."

"Thank you for reminding me that and I will make a note not to employ an educated ass as my driver ever in the future."

"You have some sass." He acknowledged.

"And you have some audacity." I curtly gave back. He didn't budge for a long time and I knew he would make me follow his orders by hook or by crook.

I removed myself with much pain and sat next to him. He started the car. My teeth were chattering with the cold and he noticed that.

"Do you need a hot drink?"

"No, thank you."

"Why were you standing in the middle of the road?"

His question made no sense to me and I did not reply. He persisted. "Why were you out of the rickshaw? Dumb!"

"Like a quintessential Bollywood diva I wanted to get drenched," I replied in words loaded with sarcasm.

"Oh! That." And he shut his mouth as well as his car. He came out and opened the door for me and with his smart mouth he aimed a barb at me, "Your personal chauffeur at your service."

"Thank you." I snapped. "But what I know is this isn't the Saatrasta you were talking about."

"For a change, you are right." Those caustic words bore deep down. I took my belongings in a sweep and took off. He didn't come back after me to stop me but I had no clue where the hell this infuriating man had stopped in the middle of nowhere what seemed like was a huge parking space.

"Where are we?" I demanded to know.

"Nowhere you need to be scared or angry about. Just walk with me."

I was left with no option but to walk with him and get out of this closed parking lot. Can I trust this guy? How much do I know him? And what if he is trapping me and...

And I was overthinking again the worst possible predicament.

"Give your mind a rest. It's still a long way to go home and I don't want you to die of pneumonia, so get yourself a decent pair of clothes to change into."

"Are you out of your head or are you pretending to be? Because in any case, slowly, slowly it seems to be dawning upon me that...you lose your sense of rationale, quite often."

He led me to an elevator.

"Where in the world are we? Can you tell me?"

"You can see yourself once we are there." I bit off my tongue in anger. This man was testing my patience. The moment the doors opened I was swarmed by the lights and the glitz of the mall. It was a huge one, just like Palladium that I had visited last week. Bile rose to my throat at the thought of spending a fortune to buy a dress from this place. He was mad to think I was going to spend my entire money to survive in Mumbai at this place.

"I want to go home Agam," I spoke softly.

"I am taking you home. I just don't want you to die in between." He spoke earnestly and his eyes had turned soft with unspoken care. I could not splurge on a dress and I was too proud to tell him the details. Papa's princess wasn't rich.

"Listen you need to change, just buy a trashy dress quickly and we will leave. Papa's princess please avoid the designer stores and the urge to shop till you drop dead."

"Trashy! In this mall? Huh?"

"Don't go to a high-end store. BigOne should do. Offers clothes at a reasonable rate."

"Thank you for the shopping guide."

We manoeuvred through the maze of designer stores to end up at a pretty huge store of BigOne. What should I buy? Can I get anything within my budget? Every kurta I picked boasted of a price tag that would make me think twice before putting it in my bag. After hunting nearly for ten minutes, the cheapest thing I found for myself was still not cheap according to my standards. Agam had not entered this side of the section but when he found me taking too much time he ended up chiding me for being choosy.

"Papa's princess, so much for arguing with me a few minutes back that you didn't need a new dress."

I sneered. This will be the most expensive shopping I would indulge in. While I was still debating the dress to pick Agam stuffed a dress in my hand. "Please put this on, we are leaving."

And before I could argue with him, he left. I went to the trial room. It was a relief to get out of the air-conditioned area and into the warm and cosy trial room. I peeled off my dress. The thought of wearing the same bra and panty again dipped my spirits. Agam had thoughtfully brought along an Anarkali dress. The colour and pattern were seriously outdated and something I would never buy myself. There was no price tag attached and I assumed that casualty would strike me at the counter.

I disposed of my panty and bra and for the lack of a separate bag to keep it in, I had to empty the side pockets of my bag and stuff them in. Walking without a panty was fine in this long Anarkali but walking without a bra? Was it a good idea? The juggling of my huge boobs was sure to draw eyeballs. I slipped on the Anarkali dress to find it to be too small and restricting my breath.

This was perfect what the fuck moment for me. The thought of wearing the same wet clothes peeved me and walking out with these super tight clothes was... I looked out of the trial room to find no one looking in my direction. I darted towards the section picked up the first dress I had liked and ran for my life. I heaved a sigh of relief when I realized that no one had seen me except the security cameras. What an irony!

Unlike the Anarkali that perfectly hid my hideous legs, this was showing them off. The dress was a perfect fit but the only concern was going braless. I somehow mustered the courage and donned the dress and walked out. I let my hair go loose and combed them with my fingers to give it a messy but not a bad hair day look. Parted my hair and let them fall on my breasts to hide whatever I could. I walked out and moved towards the counter. Agam was nowhere in sight.

When it was time to swipe my card and lose money I struggled to take those few steps which heralded my doom financially.

A tap on my shoulder made me jump out of my skin. It was Agam of course.

"Wow...you didn't put on what I selected." He checked me out from head to toe and gave me an appraising look. "This is good..." he paused for effect, "but isn't this too bold for a prude."

"Excuse me," I rolled my eyes at him.

"Let's pay and get out. It's getting late."

We stood while Agam kept on giving me weird looks to show his disapproval for not wearing something ethnic and traditional.

"You chose me a dress that was too small. I don't know how did you consider me a size zero?"

And he looked genuinely perplexed about the size.

"Well you look skinny and I don't x-ray girls."

"Oh my! First, I ain't skinny and secondly, I am perfectly well-endowed where I should be."

"That I can see." Heat crept up my cheeks out of shame. I was tongue-tied and I averted my gaze to look anywhere but at him. After the unwarranted silence, it was our turn to pay. I scuffled through my bag to find my wallet but by the time I could offer my card to be swiped, the bill was paid and I was asked to give way to the other customers.

"Why the fuck did you pay for me?" I asked agitated.

Agam looked shocked.

"What?" I asked.

"Language, I do bring out the worst in you."

"Totally." And I sighed.

"How do I pay you?"

"No need."

"I am sorry but I don't need your charity."

"I am sorry but consider it as an apology."

"What the fuck and why?"

"Whatever!" And he walked off, ending our conversation midway.

I tried pacing with him and matching his fast steps.

"Agam I can't take this. Let me pay you. And we aren't friends that you would go buying expensive gifts for me."

"Consider me one then."

"I choose my friends not the other way round."

"Ouch! That's snooty and totally papa's princess types."

"Huh!"

And I made another attempt. "Thank you for buying but I would like to pay otherwise it would weigh on my conscience."

"Take a chill pill woman. You can pay me with dinner on some other occasion."

I took a deep breath and stopped arguing because I had no cash to pay him and secondly it was a lost cause.

I walked by his side. He suddenly stopped and turned around, "By the way that is very brave of you." And he gave me a mischievous grin while I looked confused. "The dress is quite out of your character."

Was it just the dress he was commenting about or there was more to this conversation than met my eye.

"For your information, I am not a prude as you declare me to be and I do wear all kinds of clothes, though there are exceptions."

He didn't nod but just walked ahead. The aroma of freshly baked cookies from Australia Man and the burritos wafted my nose. My stomach grumbled in protest but...

"Can we eat something please? I am very hungry." Agam looked at me with a pleading look on his face.

"Umm...yeah."

"Come let's go to the last floor."

And there I know my answer had been the digging of my own grave. I thought we were headed towards the food court but Agam moved towards an area that housed several expensive restaurants to dine in. He asked for a table for two and got it immediately despite a long waiting.

We walked into pitch-black darkness with only the passageway lighted to guide the patrons. The lights in the passageway gave an illusion of the fire while the restaurant was based on the theme of a jungle. We were shown one of the corner tables to dine in which was totally secluded from the rest.

"Is this your go-to restaurant with girls?" I enquired raising my eyebrows in teasing.

"Nah...my go-to restaurants with boyfriends." He replied raising his eyebrows in the same fashion as I did.

We took our seats and he passed on the menu for me to order. He asked for a soup for me to be brought immediately and instructed it to be spicy.

"Helps relieve the cold."

"Uh-huh. But I don't have tolerance for the spicy."

"Then suck up a little bit spicy to help yourself. Are you warm?"

"Yes...better than before."

"The way your teeth were chattering in the car...I feared you are going to die by the time you will reach home."

"I would have reached faster by train."

"Do you thank people for saving your life with such caustic remarks always or I am that special?"

"Get off the high handedness, Mr Agam Khandelwal. I am no damsel in distress and you are no saviour."

"Part of the reason why I ended up in that place was because of you."

"What did I do?" He asked innocently.

"Nothing," I said. If only you would have asked me to join you in the car in film city I wouldn't have suffered this predicament. But I did not air my thoughts vociferously.

The moment the food arrived, I took to the bowl of soup and slurped it hungrily. Though the soup was mind-blowing, it was spicy and beyond my limits of tolerance. I sucked it up. Agam kept checking me out slyly but I ignored it and decided to concentrate on food than anything else. He had ordered many dishes and they were delicacies I had never tried before. I thoroughly enjoyed eating them. For the first few minutes, we ate in silence but got caught in an easy conversation soon, about work, politics, opinions, news and everything about which we held an opinion.

The waiter came in to enquire if we would like a drink.

Agam asked if I would mind him drinking. I shrugged and told him it was his choice. He ordered Mais Tai to pair it with his spicy affair while I stuck to water in the fear of catching a cold.

"Can we split the amount for dinner?" I asked.

"Abhilasha, learn to take a few things easy in life. This is my apology to you for yesterday when I whisked off without a word when I had promised we would go for coffee."

"Don't you think Agam you think too much about me lately for no reason? I mean apology for standing me when I had already refused to go for coffee. Don't take yourself too seriously man." I replied suavely totally in control of my raging emotions.

"If that was so, why that look on your face and why the refusal to join me when you could have from film city itself?"

"Because I didn't know you were coming to pick Mansi. Plus, she said she would drop me till the station and frankly I was tired of waiting."

"Don't chew more than there is there on the plate." I quipped.

"Fine accepted. Let's bury the hatchet."

"Good, we are on the same level."

Agam downed his drink in one go and ordered for more.

"Agam you have to drive us home so please be careful," I warned him.

"Yes...in my senses, Ma'am."

The natural conversation died down, what got replaced was the curt replies and deadpan answers to normal questions. We fell silent after some time and continued to enjoy our food. When we were done, the waiter walked in to tell him that bill was taken care of. Perhaps he had a long association with this restaurant and was a regular. Agam guided me out swiftly.

"The food was awesome. I am going to make another visit soon."

"Good." He added cheerfully. "The way you eat I thought I would be disappointed."

"And how exactly do I eat?" I asked amused.

"Like a person on diet, picking on all the unhealthy things to binge on except food that helps."

"That's such an apt description of me. I am overwhelmed with your insight on me." I shot back sarcastically.

"Ice cream?" He asked.

"Nope. Done for today."

"Hmmm."

We walked back to the car chatting about things here and there when he casually asked about today's fiasco at the interview.

"Nothing," I replied innocently, "Nikitaa acted like a bitch and I feel she is extremely insecure concerning her co-star. She refused to come before him for the interview and when he did she vanished from the scene and went kaput.

"Amazing."

The drive home was fast since the traffic had lightened though not the rain. Agam insisted on dropping me home. We didn't talk much, just soaked in each other's presence and the beautiful weather. He didn't enter the busy road where my bua stayed. He dropped me one block away and I insisted on the same. I needed the walk to think. He offered me his umbrella.

"Please brace yourself for the Mumbai monsoons. Will do your life some good. I don't want you to die in the land of two monsoons so quickly." He winked and smiled.

I made a goofy face at him. My heart warmed and I wanted to believe more than his words expressed but my rational head urged me otherwise. I dissected each and everything that happened today. But when it came to emotions and feelings, it's better to hear it from the person and in their own words. I overplayed all the conversations we had so far, again and again, to add up something that could help me decipher this man's epic mood swings around me. When I reached my bua's place, I was thankful that bua and fufaji were asleep. I had opened the house with the spare key bua had given to me since the day I started coming in late from work. I crept in quietly, changed my clothes and hit the sack immediately without much ado for the fear of waking anyone.

I was over-consumed by things on the superficial level and somehow my head was wrapped far more on Agam than anything else to see reason. Overtired and exhausted and the mind running in various directions then the heart led it to, I fell into a deep sleep, dreaming nothing.