Chapter 72 : Karenina's Denial of Heart

Karenina

As she pondered the possible implications of joining Xavier and Chase for dinner, a sense of unease welled up inside her. The conflicting feelings within her, torn between her lingering affection for Rylan and the undeniable allure of Xavier, left her fighting an inner battle that reflected the clash of spiritual energy and the energy of the wolf aura within her.

"Alpha Xavier would like you to join him and Alpha Chase for dinner, Luna Karen," Helga had informed her an hour after the incident.

Sitting in front of her window, gazing at Xavier's pack house, she turned to Helga after her maid had answered the light knock at her door. She absentmindedly started to get up to answer, but Helga was already ahead of her. She sighed, forgetting that Helga was here to 'help' her. She let her answer her call without a word and went back to staring out the window, longing to be back with her friends and the normal life they led.

Now she was temporarily living in Westwood's pack house, recovering from being injured in a contest held by the Alpha of Westwood to find a strong mate, then winning the contest, and now facing the odds - Xavier was trying to make her his mate. This still puzzled her because not only did he insist on mating her according to Westwood Pack customs, but he was also sexually attracted to her. The mere thought of a sexual relationship between them made her blood run cold. But that was just lust! And she still loved his stepbrother.

But what really worried and frightened her was the energy of the wolf aura that she hadn't even realized was inside her, coming from the Moonlight Stone that had been kept inside her. She could feel it even now, pulsing and swirling in her chest along with her spiritual energy. It was still weak compared to her spiritual energy, but it was growing stronger and faster. What would happen with these two opposing powers? How could they coexist without destroying her? Immediately, she shuddered in fear.

"Luna?" Helga called to her, coming over and kneeling at her side to look her in the eyes.

Immediately she blinked and pushed away her worried thoughts. Karen was sure those thoughts would come back to haunt her. She had to concentrate. "I'm not sure this is a good idea, Helga. Alpha Chase doesn't seem to like me. I doubt he'll be happy to have dinner with me. After all, he came to see Xavier." Actually, she refused to admit that she did not want to meet the Alpha of Westwood either, because the thought of him was as confusing as her two auras.

As she saw her eyes close, she looked down, her head bowed in resignation. "Luna... Do you think it's best to refuse Alpha Xavier's request?

Her hesitant answer and her maidenly demeanor made Karen feel sad. It was clear to her that Helga was still afraid of upsetting her, still assuming that they were master and servant. Not wanting to make the situation uncomfortable for her if she refused, Karen offered a small, fake smile. "On second thought, I'll gladly accept. When should I start getting ready?"

Then Helga lifted her head, her eyes filled with relief that made her feel a little guilty for worrying her. "Dinner is only a few hours away, so there isn't much time to get you dressed."

Immediately, Karen almost lost her smile. Getting ready would take that long? She almost sighed at the thought. Helga encouraged her to take a quick shower, and she said she could do it herself. Helga didn't argue and instead got up to prepare the clothes she would wear for the event.

Alone in the bathroom, Karen undressed and hesitated when she saw the bandage. She slowly unwrapped the bandage herself, her wounds protesting slightly at her movements, but she felt the urge to check the status of her wounds after the drama in Xavier's training hall.

Soon the white bandage was revealed, revealing the wound on her left shoulder. The wound was nearly healed. Five days ago, the four deep cuts had been over an inch deep and a quarter of an inch wide. Now the wound had a thin scab, a few inches thick, surrounded by scar tissue. She seemed to be in the final stages of healing.

She straightened her back and felt uncomfortable. The wound was still there, but it was no longer painful. She tried to swallow her rising anxiety. This was what she had wanted from the beginning, to be less of a burden, to heal faster than a normal hybrid. But now? The thought was too terrifying.

She glanced over her shoulder one last time before stepping into the bathtub, quickly immersing herself in the warm water. Actually, Karen wanted to linger, as she always enjoyed a warm bath, but she had a schedule to keep, so she quickly got into the shower. It was only when she ran the washcloth over her left side that there was a slight discoloration that made her pause from her strokes.

Frowning, she muttered, "What the...?"

After rinsing, she sat on the edge of the tub and curled up to examine her body more closely. She saw the usual scars from the rogue who had taken the Moonlight Stone from her, but instead of white marks, a gray color had replaced them. Around her middle, jagged carved lines appeared above her chest.

As she thought, hoping it was dirt or dust, she rubbed a washcloth over the marks, trying to clean them up. But it was still there. A pang of fear hit her chest. Karen didn't know what the mark meant, but she doubted it was a good sign. She didn't realize that the mark was centered on the area where the Moonlight Stone had been before it was painfully removed.

Rushing out of the water, Karen quickly dried her body and put on a towel. Then she rushed into her bedroom, her mouth open to tell Helga in her panic, when her eyes fell on the pile of clothes covering her bed.

"Ah, Luna. Have you finished showering?" She asked her, turning to give her a small smile, then frowning when she saw her expression. "What is it? Is something wrong?" She walked over and placed a gentle hand on her uninjured shoulder.

Swallowing, Karen tried to smile. "Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just curious what I'm going to wear tonight." She wasn't sure why she was lying, but she didn't want to burden Helga. She didn't know her at all, didn't know anything about what had happened to her. There was only one person she could talk to who could give her an explanation - Xavier.

Helga gave her a questioning look, but didn't argue. "Of course. This way."

Helga led her to a dress hanging on a wooden rack, proudly displaying the beautiful garment. It was indigo and deep purple with a swirling white mist. "It's beautiful," she said admiringly, fingering the expensive fabric. Then she realized how large it was, and her eyes fell on the dresses lying on her bed. One was white, the others were light blue and light purple. "Do I have to wear all of them?" she asked anxiously.

Hearing her tone, Helga hesitated. "You don't like them?"

Looking quickly at her face, Karen caught her hand with her own, startling Helga with her touch, but she ignored it. "Oh, no! Of course I like it. I've just never worn anything like this before."

Then Helga smiled understandingly. "I know you are not used to wearing such elaborate clothes, but it is only natural since you are the guest of honor and will be dining with two powerful alphas."

She just nodded, watching layer after layer of fabric, her heart sinking. Karen was sure this was going to be complicated and heavy. How can she walk in this, she thought in a slight panic.

As if reading her mind, Helga reassured her, "It's much easier than you think. You'll walk slowly and I'll be there to help you if you need it." She nodded again.

"Do you need help with your bandages, Luna? Or did you leave them on in the shower?" asked Helga as she rubbed the dress, smoothing out the creases.

Remembering the strange marks on her side, Karen shook her head. "No, I mean, yes, I took the bandage off, but my wound seems to have healed, so I don't think there's any need to re-bandage it."

"That's good news," Helga said with genuine warmth.

Soon they began styling her dark brown hair at the back of her head, leaving half of it hanging down her back. Helga even had ornate hairpins and braid pins inserted into her hair, which clanked slightly every time she moved her head. The unusual weight made her head feel heavy and stiff, but she did not complain. Next came the makeup. Her face was lightly powdered to make it look paler, her cheeks were polished with pink blush, her hazel brown eyes looked more prominent, and her lips were lined with ruby red lipstick. Finally, Helga helped her put on her dress, which is made up of two layers on the inside before a top layer is applied. The process literally took hours, Helga told her.

When Karen finally stood in front of her large mirror to see the final result, she didn't even recognize herself. Instead of a young teenage girl, the young woman looking back at her was a beautiful woman she had only seen in magazines and textbooks. She looked like a real princess out of a fairy tale.

"Wow," she whispered.

Helga smiled proudly behind her as she made little touches to the intricately tied sash of light brown ribbon. "You really look beautiful, Luna Karen. Alpha Xavier would be amazed."

She felt her cheeks warm at the thought of Xavier seeing her like this. Would he be impressed too, was her subconscious thought.

"It's time to go to the dining hall. We don't want you to be late," Helga told her.

"Uh, right," Karen muttered, her worries about tripping and falling coming back.

Meanwhile, Helga chuckled. "Don't worry, really. Everything will be fine, you'll see. But I must warn you that I will be walking behind you. Since Alpha Chase is here, some formalities cannot be ignored. Again, don't worry. I'll whisper directions to you."

She watched Helga, who was smiling a little as she patted her dress one last time. Helga didn't seem to mind being obedient to her, but she did mind her. She was her friend, but their relationship was burdened by a sense of formal status that didn't really belong to her. She feels that she is not the real Luna.

When they left her room with Helga's whispered instructions, she felt a gap between them like never before. This isn't me, she wanted to scream. She was a teenager in high school, not the elegant Luna, used to having servants and wealth. Yet she had been forced into this role, and all because Xavier thought she would be his mate.

Since she had realized his interest, his intentions, she had opposed him because she didn't love him - not that he didn't love her either - and she still loved his brother. Not long ago, Xavier had asked her to give him the same chance she had given Rylan, a chance to change her mind about being his mate. Karen had only agreed because she wanted him to leave her at that moment, his presence had made her feel nervous.

She couldn't do that, be someone she wasn't. And she felt bad for giving Xavier false hope when there was none. He probably knew how she felt about the whole situation, but she couldn't stand it any longer. She had to tell him, when they had some time alone, that they weren't right for each other. They came from two different backgrounds, indirectly. If Xavier was still willing to help her control her newfound wolf aura energy and defeat Nathan, then she wouldn't refuse to ally with him, but she wouldn't and would never be his mate.

She was determined. She ignored the pain in her heart. It was just lust! She didn't have any stronger feelings for him, did she? Rylan was the one she wanted, wasn't he? Then why was her heart heavy at the thought of no longer being in his arms, no longer feeling the touch of his lips on hers. Stop it! This is for the best, she told herself. She wouldn't let Xavier have any of it. She knew what it was like to be second. No, her situation with Rylan wasn't perfect either, but her heart still held hope. Until that hope died, how could she imagine being with someone else if she couldn't give her whole heart to this man?

They finally arrived at the large doors of the fine dining room without her fully realizing how they got there, so deep were her thoughts. As two male guards stepped forward to open the door, her heart skipped a beat at the sight of Xavier again and the uncomfortable meal ahead.

Please, don't let me trip and fall, she silently begged the moon goddess to listen.

Stepping forward, her head snapped up as she entered the main dining room. Her mouth almost fell open at the magnificence around her, and she could barely stop herself from gawking like a tourist. Would she never get used to the luxurious atmosphere of Xavier's Pack House?