Seventy Six
Ruby
Three years.
I have been waiting for three years.
Time flew past so fast while I was waiting for Adonis to show up in front of me again. While I managed to go on with my life, I always paused for some seconds to see if he was anywhere around me.
He never was neither were there traces of him in his two homes.
I graduated high school, took a year break before heading to the university to find out what appeals to me the most in life and now, that I am finally in the university, I am still waiting for him.
At first, all I wanted was just to see if he was alive. I placed my hopes on the numerous searches embarked on by the police but, after a while, everything was futile. I watched the cops pack their bags and give up on searching for the man whose existence had become a mystery.
Occasionally, I felt anger towards Adonis Klaus, but I always managed to cloud that anger with my need to see him alive.
But, as three years passed, I felt anger and many more emotions. Some days I hate him, sometimes, I cry because I miss him.
On certain nights, my anger rises so much that I always find a way to sneak out of the house to check out his apartment and, on getting to the entrance, my entire being gets washed with this feeling that makes my knees and heart go weak.
I never stayed angry at the man for too long, I mostly missed him.
And, that’s what I do these days.
Whenever I am in my room, I look out of the small window and all I do is think about him. I miss him but time taught my heart to heal while missing him.
I got up from my bed and slid my laptop into my bag. After closing the window which gives me a lovely view of the moon at night, I walked out of my dorm room in which I am the only occupant. The hostel building seemed quiet as I walked my way towards the exit. Perhaps people were still in their beds, hungover from the crazy party held the previous night.
Of course, I didn’t go. I was busy watching the moon while listening to some soothing music and thinking about him.
As soon as I stepped outside, I felt something drop onto my right cheek. I looked up to the sky and it looked like it would rain. Good thing my umbrella was able to tempt me to take it that day.
There was no serious downpour yet, so I continued walking.
As I walked a bit further, I noticed two people. Cup of coffee in their hands, the duo seemed like a couple as they shared smiles, flirting looks and playful sneers within a few minutes and I felt sad instantly.
Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t sad because I didn’t have my man in my life.
I just find it sorrowful that Adonis and I didn’t have the chance to go out much. We barely went on dates, we were mostly trying to make sure the Xylem gang didn’t get to us.
It is sad because I didn’t get to hold hands with him that much. We hardly got a chance to do those simple things and more.
I heaved another deep sigh as my journey to class got shorter and shorter.
I have spent almost two years in the university and apart from the time I mourn Adonis's refusal to re-enter my life, I actually enjoy the life I am living in the learning institution.
Thanks to Bryan’s psycho attitude, while I stayed back for a year to sort out my life, after research upon research, I finally realized I found Criminology an interesting field of study. And, so far, it has been fun.
I have also made some friends who make the journey really fun. Whenever they notice I am deep in thought in a sad way, they never hesitate to suggest a quick trip to the café downtown.
“Oh, she is smiling,” one of those friends I was talking about kicked me out of my thoughts with his voice which has made a lot of ladies devote their time to listening to him on Poetry Night on Saturdays.
“Hey, Pete.” I hugged the tall man whose long hair made me jealous. This time, he had his hair made into a man bun and that made him look even better. I looked into his small eyes which found a way to twinkle in a seducing way. His full lips smiled widely at me as I smirked at the addition of the scarf to his outfit. I got the scarf for him for his birthday.
People passing by us stopped to take a look at the piece of art in front of me whose dress style was as sexy as he was.
Nope, I’m not thirsting over him.
“I am surprised you are early today. Did you perhaps hear about the new teacher? Are you trying to get in his good shoes?”
”What new teacher?” I asked confused as heck.
“Didn’t you hear? Mr. Perez was involved in an accident. But it was no ordinary accident, bars of gold were found in his possession when the accident occurred.”
”Seriously? That old geezer has gold bars?” Trust me, I am really surprised. That man has to be the most stingy individual I have seen. He is even stingy with grades. I guess it is my bad luck that I ended up in another one of his classes in my second year.
“No, what does he have? He stole the gold from a gang.”
”Really?” Pete nodded as I wore a shocked look. “Mr. Perez is audacious enough to steal from a gang? Wow. Who is exactly is that teacher of ours?”
”That man is a mystery. We should go in, I hope the new teacher is not as crazy as Mr. Perez.”
I nodded, thinking the same.
Step after step and we both moved closer to the lecture hall.
“Hmm, it’s awfully quiet in there,” Pete said as he was about to push the door open. When he did, he said, “Wow!”, and the excitement in his voice made me rush in after him.
I looked at the platform that faced the class and as the man that stood by the long table on the platform, glanced my way, I instantly grabbed Pete’s arm for support.
“Hey, are you fine?” I heard Pete’s voice faintly. I heard the sound of my thumping heart more.
The man turned to face the class as though we didn’t just lock eyes and with the overwhelming feeling inside me, I decided to do the same.
I decided to pretend I didn’t just look into Adonis Klaus’s eyes which were looking more emerald green at that point.
“I’m fine,” I managed to say as Pete looked down at me with absolute worry. I swallowed as I tried to keep my tears at bay. I nodded slowly and told Pete I’d like to have my seat.
Thankfully, my usual seat was not in the front and it was not in a position where it is easy to look into the lecturer’s eyes, so that worked to my advantage. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t glance in his direction, my pounding heart just couldn’t help but look at him.
He looked somewhat different. Perhaps it was the glasses he had on.
I held my hands together beneath the desk to keep myself from doing something crazy.
“Hello class,” he spoke and my ears itched seriously, I almost cried. As my insides melted at the sound of his voice, I turned my head in the opposite direction. “First,” he continued, “I’ll like to shift this class to ten am, eight am classes are not for me, is that fine with everyone?”
The rest of the class replied positively, I could hear the excitement in their voice.
Soon, he resumed the class and I just sat there, confused, unfocused and with a head that was getting filled with thousands of questions.
~
Surprisingly, his class made sense. His teaching was understandable and according to the words of the people that sat behind me, he was way better than Mr. Perez.
Soon, everyone left the room in groups. Pete got up and asked me if I was okay.
“I need to do some thinking, so I’ll stay here for a bit.”
”You seemed distracted during the class, are you sure you want to be alone?” he asked further, his hand on my shoulder.
I nodded and he walked out, his head tipped a bit to greet Adonis as he walked past him.
I let out a shuddering sigh as Adonis and I were left in the room. I had no idea what I was going to do, but I wasn’t going to let him walk out of the class without saying a word to him. Something violent within me wished to land some slap on his beautiful cheek, but I cautioned that feeling.
I hurried my steps down the stairs as Adonis walked towards the door. But, my hurried steps were halted as he closed the door, rested against it and faced me.
My heart pounded again.
“Hi, Ruby.”
My fists clenched as I walked towards him with caution. “You are alive,” I said with a low voice.
“I am,” he responded.
“And here you are, about three years later, showing up in front of me like you didn’t suddenly disappear after that incident.”
His gaze shifted to the ground for a brief moment. “I knew you would be angry.”
I folded my arms as I stopped my steps a few metres away from him.
“I should be angry.”
”Yes.” Adonis nodded his head slowly as his back left the smoothness of the door and he began to walk towards me. “You should be angry.”
Once he was right in front of me, his eyes looking down at me who had grown a few inches taller, he said, “I wish I was able to come sooner, Ruby.”
The softness in his voice killed the rising anger within me. At that point, all I wanted to do was hug him tight.
“Why didn’t you?” I asked.
Adonis let out a questionable amount of air as he sighed. Looking at me through his glasses, he held my cheeks, sent electric-like waves down my system and said, “I have missed you so much, Peanut.”
My lips quivered, and I bit my lower lip to hide that reaction. My entire body felt a shiver envelope it and my willingness to put up a tough front crashed. My eyes getting clouded with tears, I asked him, “Why are you just coming to me now? Do you know how long I have been waiting?”
”I told you not to wait, Ruby.”
”So, what? Was I was just supposed to forget about you? I was supposed to act as if I never met you?” I scoffed softly as my eyes travelled in another direction while I attempted to get rid of my incoming tears.
“I couldn’t forget you, Adonis, I even see you in my dreams. Or wait…”
I tried to take his hands off my cheeks but his touch wouldn’t budge. “Did you forget about me?”
”No,” he quickly refuted, a frown on his forehead. “Not a single day passed by that I didn’t think of you. Not seeing you wasn’t an easy thing to do. Sometimes I found myself wishing to park my bags and travel down to come to meet you, but I couldn’t.”
“Then, why didn’t you come anyway? Even if it was just for a minute, you could have shown your face and assured me that you were alive. Why was it so difficult to see me?”
Adonis exhaled hard as I searched his eyes with desperation in mine. I won’t lie, I need answers. I need him to give his reasons for not showing up.
“I can’t have you around me, Ruby.”
Why did that statement pierce my heart so much?
’Wh-what do you mean by that?”
”You nearly died back there because of me.” I nearly let out a cry as his hold on my cheeks was removed. Adonis took a step back and I took one forward.
“I didn’t die, neither did you.”
”Things are way worse now, Ruby.”
At that point, I was more confused. “How so?”
”I am now the leader of the Xylem gang,” he dropped and my steps finally went in the backward direction.
“How-” I swallowed hard. “How did that happen? You are a gang leader now? Aren’t you here because you got a job as a teacher.”
”I am here because of you, Ruby.”
”Huh?”
”Mr. Perez stole our gold and since we have him in our care, we are the reason your class needs a new teacher.”
”And… you are the new teacher?”
”No. I convinced the new teacher to let me teach in his stead because I wanted to talk to you.”
I let out a bitter chuckle. “So, why exactly are you here? To make sure I forget about your existence?”
”Even I can’t forget about your existence, Ruby. I am here because I want to stop feeling guilty.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Guilty about what?”
”The danger I put you in back then.”
”I told you, Adonis-”
”I want to be with you again badly, Ruby. These days, you are both my dream and nightmare and that means one thing, I want you in my life like old times. I want to feel your love as I love you with all my might.” My hand which was in the air as it was about to make some gestures to drive a point fell to my side instantly. I looked into his eyes and saw that they were filled with intent, but, at the same time, sadness.
“But,” I finally heard him say the word that was hanging at the tip of his tongue, “I am no longer the man you used to know. As I said, I am now the gang leader, times are more dangerous now and as much as I want you by my side, I can’t let you be by my side. If something terrible happens to you, I’ll never forgive myself.”
”So…” I was really disappointed. His words didn’t end the way I wished they would end .“We can’t be together?”
”We can and we cannot.”
“Dude, pick one answer, I am getting frustrated here,” I said almost angrily, my eyes closing the next second as I tried to hide the feeling.
“Ruby…” I opened my eyes as his warm touch caressed my hands. “I want to say something stupid and selfish.”
“What?”
”I want you to choose.”
”Choose what?”
“I want you as much as you want more, but if we get back together, you are more likely to be in danger and as I said, I won’t forgive myself if something happens to you. But, we can risk it right? So, you can either choose the option of us being together again…”
”Or?” I asked quietly.
“Or, we both go our separate ways and forget we ever meet. You will never be exposed to danger. That way, your life will be peaceful as it has always been for the past few years.”
“Wait, so you stayed back all these years because you thought my life was peaceful without you?” I asked with a frown and he nodded. “That’s very selfish of you. More selfish than this suggestion of yours.”
”That’s why you can make a choice. You can punish me for not coming to see you by choosing to part ways, or, you can forgive me by choosing the option of us being together.” He held my shoulders firmly. “I want you to make this choice, Ruby. I will respect your decision.”
”Are you really back to being a gangster?” That was the question on my mind. I wanted it to be a lie, so I searched his eyes as I waited for his response.
I watched as Adonis reached for the end of his shirt. He raised it slightly to expose a gun strapped to his waist. Well, that explains the little bulge I noticed while he was teaching.
“Yes, I am,” he said as he dropped the end of his shirt.
That would be the reason making a choice would be difficult.
“I’d like to think about it.”
”That’s fine, Ruby.” He reached for something in his pocket. He handed me a card that had an ‘X’’ mark on the back and a phone number on the front. “Call me if you need to talk to me.”
I nodded, still having mixed feelings about everything.
“I have a class soon, I should get going.” Those mixed feelings couldn’t handle me being in the same room with the man who had suddenly reappeared.
“Yes,” his voice sounded huskier as he talked. “You should.” He took a step closer and when I looked up at him, he had this look of desire in his eyes. I couldn’t tear my eyes off him either.
“I don’t want to be the reason you miss your classes,” he said, his voice dragging the sentence in a way that was seductive.
My eyes followed his and I didn’t miss how they landed on my lips.
Adonis pressed his lips into a thin line and I wished for a second that he would just kiss me.
But, I came to my senses.
I wasn’t going to kiss that man until I have made a decision.
So, I rushed out of the classroom, the mixed feelings inside me overpowering me as I thought of the choices I had to make.
Those choices will determine the fate of our relationship.
