Chapter 20

"Okay," the lady screams, "that fool who is ordering me is my brother. Marilí, I'm giggles, we talked once on the phone, my name is Lucelia Montenegro, I'm Kahin's half-sister, that's why we're not much alike. Yes I know my father is black,” hearing that leaves me stunned and not knowing what to say, I look at Kahin his face that was so contorted that he seems to have sucked a lemon because of how angry he is.

"I didn't know ...”

"How the hell would you know if you don't let them explain it to you?" He takes a step in my direction and I recoil.

“We both know that it would not be good if you were with the baby at this moment, he will be fine I promise,” giggles said, reaching for my son, I know that she is right so entrusting my son to her, I kiss him on the forehead and give him to her.

"Thank you for trusting to me," she smiles and fondles the brown one, when I look at Kahin, he was already hugging him.

"Did you think I could change you that easily?" Looking into his eyes, I didn't fight for him to let go of me, “you called the baby Kahin, I heard you,” trying to organize my ideas and not fall into that look that makes me always give in.

“I called you and then I said son, that's why ‘Kahin son’ was heard,” my apparent coldness has nothing to do with the nerves I feel, his look of distrust makes it clear to me that he doesn't believe it.

"I need you," he whispers, approaching my lips, I long for that contact, I long to be close to him, I miss that feeling that only he knows how to create in me, but everything that limits me comes to my mind.

"I no longer need you Kahin," taking advantage of his carelessness by my words, I turn away from him, “I will never forget,” without turning my back on him, I back off. I will not allow him to stop me, not this time, his sad gaze begs me, but I pay little attention to him. When I'm away, I turn and go up the stairs. Room by room, I look for Lucy with my baby, when I find them I sigh and enter, my child is asleep in a crib.

"Look, I just changed him and he fell asleep," she smiles, looking lovingly at my son.

"Thank you for taking care of him, I'll take him so that you can rest," smiling, I approach the crib, "I'm sorry I spoke to you like that," I say without looking at her.

“Quiet, if it were my son I would react the same,” she stands by my side, “can you leave him with me?” I look at her strangely, “I am not stupid Marilí, my brother may believe you but I do not, I listened very well when you called him Kahin’s son,” s he smiles to me, “I know how he can be my brother and I'm aware of everything that happened, but I think he deserves you to talk to him, don't hide the baby from him, it's too risky and you more than anyone else knows how it is when he is disappointed.” I bite the inside of my cheeks, I still remember very well the look he gave me at the airport before I left, the disappointment in his eyes made my blood run cold.

“I'm not sure about this, even though I want to talk to him and fix everything there are many things that stop me not doing it, they also include not telling him that this baby is his and I ask that you please don't tell him either. Can you do that for me?”

She looks at my son and sighs, “if my baby had a father, even if he wasn't with me, even if he had hurt me, I would have told him about the existence of my baby,” she looks at me now, “you will have your reasons and I can only tell you, how you love yourself, hate yourself.”

Swallowing with difficulty, I seat, “thank you very much Lucy, it has been a pleasure to finally meet you." I smile and caress my son's hand. "I'll leave my son, please take good care of him, if he wakes up you call me to breastfeed him," she nods, smiling at me this time.

With my head in a mess and my thoughts disordered, I leave the room thinking about what she has told me. Doesn’t her baby have no father? I stop thinking and go to what was once my room with Kahin, I sigh when I look at everything, it is as I left it, I smile when I see our photo the day we went to Colón. Arriving beside the closet, I can see that all the clothes that he bought me are still in, I take out a pair of pajamas and go to the shower, I need to rest.

"Fuck," I hear his growl behind me, out of inertia I press the towel to my chest.

"What are you doing here Kahin? It's late and I really want to rest,” I look over my shoulder at him. He approaches me with that sexy bad boy walk that he has, that man is just as good and more with that little beard that he allowed himself to grow. Giving me a lustful slap on my ass, I turn to look at him, I can't think of these things, “I want to get dressed, please go out,” I say, taking the clothes in my hands, his body sticks to mine and his erection sinks into my lower back. He removes the clothes from my hands, his hot breath caressing the bare skin of my left shoulder.

“You need it and you know it,” he places a delicate and suggestive kiss on my neck, immediately the hair on my whole body wakes up and I get turned on, “I want to feel what I felt before, I want to touch your skin, I want to feel it like I remember. I am crazy to sink into you and see how you have missed me,” my lower belly contracts violently and my sex gets wet without stopping. “I want to give it to you so soft and so violent at the same time to the point that your screams are interrupted by the shortness of breath,” his hands go up my body, over the towel, when he reaches my breasts he undoes it and lets it fall. My whole body trembles, my whole body burns and all my thoughts fade and my memory forgets everything. I shouldn't get carried away, I should stop him.

"Kahin," I gasp his name when I feel his hands moving over my body, I feel his need for me, I feel his excitement, the heat of his body and what reminds me the most of what we once were are his words in my ear.

“Don't resist any more, Sweetie, let yourself go and let me enjoy your body,” I don't say more and turn around, I can't help this sexual attraction that I feel for him, “I'm going to charge your body for all your absences,” listeing to those sexy words, I lower all my defenses. I know we have a lot to talk about, I know I'm doing it wrong, I shouldn't be doing this, much less forgiving what he did to me, but I just can't. I need it.

“Kiss me and remind me,” I wisher and my brunette smiles like an idiot and kisses me, unleashing his passion, the one I'm used to. He devours me with his mouth, he reminds me of the sensations he always made me feel, he clarifies that only he is the owner of my skin and that makes me feel like a bitch, a bitch who is willing to deceive herself to be with him.