36

I looked at Cyril who was tearing through his hair. He was a proud warrior. Quiet and successful. But here he had failed, for the first time.

"I was always close to her," he babbled repeatedly. The loss was hard for him to believe and it was only a day ago. I had come as soon as possible after he let me know and was now weighing my options.

I could let it all go, kill Elisane Grayson, and take home an unfortunate Erasthai. Then I would have an Erasthai at my side, which would not strengthen me. On the contrary, I would be busy 24 hours a day comforting their grief and unhappy myself. Besides, I would still have to take care of Elisane.

If I ended her life, her family would surely be out for revenge, uncontrollable and deadly to many. I couldn't be in all the places in the world at once to protect the innocent souls they would kill.

If I didn't, she would still go on a vendetta and kill everyone my Erasthai loved. Even these had become too many for me to protect them all at once. Esme and Trevor were safe from them, but there were so many besides them to protect. Not everyone had a witch as powerful as her and Tara's heart was big when it came to those in need of protection.

"You know where he Grayson is?" Cyril nodded but seemed absent. He was always chilled and never distracted. I had never seen him like this before. He was completely beside himself.

"Where?" I asked, not wanting to ask.

"With her brother. They haven't left yet. You know as well as I do that if I approached him he would kill him instantly. She's with him now." Cyril hung his thoughts while answering me, but elsewhere.

"What is it?" I asked him.

"She loves him," he murmured, and it hit my heart. Not that I wasn't aware of it. I was at Grayson's house this morning and her pain was almost unbearable.

"You can still show her how you feel about her." Cyril rose and looked in the direction she was facing. He was hiding something and it definitely had to do with his feelings. I had thought until today that he didn't even have any. Maybe also that he didn't know how to use them.

"You mean I should manipulate her?" I asked back, looking in the same direction.

"It would work, no one can resist the love of their Erasthai, not even her. She may be stubborn, but she can't fight it."

"Maybe we can direct their feelings, but who are we in the end. Would you like a mindless doll by your side?" I asked him further.

"Maybe better than alone," he murmured. The way he said it told me he had found his Erasthai. Cyril would never admit it, nor neglect his duties for it. he was like me There were more important things than finding happiness or enforcing it.

"What are you doing with your Erasthai now?" I asked bluntly.

"Make sure she doesn't do anything stupid," he murmured.

"What do I do with mine now?" I sighed and sat down on the rock next to him.

"What you've been planning for a while. Give her up, give her a nice life and come back when it's over," Cyril replied dryly.

"It sounds so easy when you say that."

"It won't," he growled back.

It hasn't been and never will be. A year ago I had trusted the oracle and done everything as she said, but now I realized that I had been wrong.

"Keep an eye on Elisane. If she kills Grayson, don't hesitate to do the same to her," I ordered him and straightened up.

"You know what that would mean?" His words were warning yet soft.

"War," I answer him dryly. It was something I was now willing to risk.

"It has long since begun, my king." Cyril sat up next to me and I only now realized that we didn't just resemble each other on the outside. "You would lose her forever and I will vouch with my life if it doesn't happen."

"Your loyalty is truly unwavering," I laughed bitterly.

"Just for two," he laughed and I knew he meant my best friend Callum and not his Erasthai.

"Stay close to Elisane. See you in St. Vincent of Ice. There's a plane ready for you in case you have to leave before me." Elisane would certainly take Grayson with her. She wasn't very smart, but she wasn't stupid enough to leave him thousands of miles with her brother either.

Cyril and I said our goodbyes in silence and I walked the remaining mile to Grayson's house where Tara was staying. It only took me a few seconds to get there, but I spent almost an hour in front of the house before I had the courage to knock.

Trevor and Jade were with her and as I expected, he opened the door. He wasn't surprised, nor was Jade, who stepped up to him. They were completely beside themselves and their pain was not only visible through their outward appearance.

"Let me talk to Tara," I instructed them and they obeyed and left the house immediately. I didn't want to use my powers. Not towards them, not in this situation, but I didn't want any discussions either.

Tara turned to me as I entered the living room and gave me a sheepish smile.

"Glad you're here," she murmured and I held out my arms for her, which she threw herself into without hesitation.

"I love him," she sobbed, burying her head in my chest. And I you, I wanted to answer. Why do you only realize it when you lose something?

"I know," I answer her honestly. I knew only too well what first love felt like and how quickly it can pass. I couldn't take it from her, it was an experience everyone had to have, I told myself.

I remembered only too well when I buried my first love. Something like this should happen in one hundred and forty-four years. The thought of it was still painful. She had just turned twenty and was about to.

The pain I carried for her was nothing compared to what I felt for her and I wanted nothing more than to be in Grayson's place. But those weren't the same feelings Tara was carrying and I had to accept it.

I may have had no choice in the beginning when it came to my Erasthai and even less to be happy with her, but I was able to enable her to be happy. Perhaps. At least I hoped so.

"What did Elisane ask of you?" I asked, although I already knew the answer.

"Showing up for the fox hunt," she sighed, looking up at me.

If Tara found her death there in front of many witnesses, it would be something no one would question. No pack would doubt it and succumb to their deception.

Even I, knowing about the booby traps Elisane had set in the icy sea, knew my hands were tied.

My options for helping Tara were limited. Keeping Elisane safe, playing along in her perfidious game, risking everything, was the only way to save Grayson and the woman I loved.

I was too scared that his death would result in Tara's.

"I will be by your side, Tara. You have nothing to fear and Grayson will return to you safely," I assured her. I didn't even know if I could keep that promise.