16

I was starving! I hadn't eaten all day and I could feel my stomach plotting and groaning about how it was going to eat my other organs if I didn't get any food in my system. Okay... Maybe that was a little overdramatized but I was hungry.

I paused my music and walked out of my room heading for the kitchen. My feet made almost no noise as I walked down the halls and entered the kitchen. My heart pounded as I entered because of the mass of werewolves in the dining room beside it. All eyes were on me as I crept past and entered the kitchen.

I quickly grabbed some honey buns out of the pantry and headed back to my room. I ignored the stares as I walked up the stairs and made my way to my room. I opened a honey bun and ate it quickly and finished the other two I had. I walked in my room and shut the door behind me. I threw the wrappers in the trash in the corner of the room and sat on my bed turning my music back on. I hummed along to the rhythm but I'd turned it low. I looked out the window at the darkening sky and after a bit I heard a door shut. It was Clayton in his room.

My heart instantly sped up and I looked at the wall in between us. I needed to tell him.

I got off my bed and crept out of my room. I stopped in front of his door and brought a shaking hand up to knock. There was a pause after my knocking then Clayton's voice said gruffly, "Who is it?" I swallowed.

"We have to talk." I said in my most steady voice and Clayton growled.

"Come in." My mate growled and I slipped inside and shut the door. I knew he'd probably start an argument before I could explain and I was prepared for it. I didn't care what he said, right now I needed his closeness.

"What do you want?" He growled before I could say anything. He sat in a chair beside his bed looking at some papers and marking something down.

"I need to tell you what happened." I said softly and cleared my tightening throat. Clayton huffed and set the papers down. He looked up at me with irritated eyes.

"Please I don't wanna hear how you pleasured yourself with some guy." Clayton growled and waved me off like I was some pesky fly.

"Just let me-" I began but he stood and glared at me. His brow scrunched in anger and his fists clenched.

"I don't want to hear it!" He snarled and I flinched but attempted again.

"But I-" before I could finish Clayton was in front of me and pinning me against the wall. The damn wall.

"I don't want to hear it." Clayton snarled in my face.

"You need to hear it!" I yelled and he shook his head and locked his eyes on mine.

"You need to get out." He growled pulling me towards the door. Finally I couldn't take it anymore.

"I was raped you fucking son of a bitch!" I screamed and Clayton froze. His annoyed glare turned into a confused look.

"What?" He said in a low voice and I pulled away from him and covered my face in my hands. Tears started running down my face, "I was raped." I said in a shaky voice and realized I was trembling.

"How? Who? When?" Clayton growled softly and pulled my hands from my face. He looked utterly horrified. A groan escaped his lips as he stumbled away from me and sat on his bed running his fingers through his hair and scrubbing his hand down his face. He sighed and pinched the brim of his nose. He shook his head and started swearing under his breath.

"I don't know... I was fourteen, it was a long time ago. I'll tell you what I remember though..." I told him everything and at the end he was cursing loudly and growling. He put his hands over his ears and groaned before looking at me with red eyes. I gulped.

"I'm-I... I can't believe what I said to you. I don't deserve a mate... I don't deserve you. I'm such an asshole, you're right. You were raped-and I called you a whore. You were raped and I called you a whore! What the hell is wrong with me?!" Clayton snarled and his nails grew into claws and I gasped as he slashed over his arm. I covered my mouth as I watched the blood run down his arm and I let out a sob as he kept scratching himself. As I watched the scratches healed and he looked at his bloody clothes. He was panting heavily and I felt tears running down my cheeks.

"Downside of being an alpha; you heal like crazy." Clayton said bitterly and I let out a gagging sob. That was horrifying.

"Don't ever do that again." I said sternly and he looked up at me with watery eyes.

"I deserved it." My mate grumbled and shrugged. I let out a soft sob.

"Don't hurt yourself around me." I said and tried to hold in my sobs. This was too much.

He eventually calmed down and his claws disappeared.

"Come here." My mate said opening his arms and I paused before going to him. I couldn't take my eyes off the blood on him. He ripped off his bloody shirt and wiped himself clean, he wore a black tank top underneath. I blinked and walked toward him and then flung myself in his arms. He let out a low growl and his arms wrapped around me.

"I'm sorry." He whispered in my ears and I started crying. He hugged me tighter as my sobs grew and after some time I realized he was shaking as well. I looked up into his eyes and saw tears staining his cheeks and pooling in his eyes.

"Your crying..." I said softly and he gave a bitter smile then chuckled before hugging me tighter and burying his face in my hair.

"I love you." Clayton said in a shaking voice and my heart fluttered. I looked up at him and met his eyes. He blinked and a tear fell from his eye on my cheek and he wiped it away, "Sorry..." He sighed. I hummed and laid my head in the crook of his neck. He let out a huge breath and rubbed his hands down my back in a massaging fashion.

"Mea lux." Clayton sighed and kissed my head. I paused and looked up at him, "What does that mean?" I asked him and he smiled softly.

"My light." He said with a soft chuckle and kissed me. Well he kissed my cheek. His face reddened a bit and I inwardly awed at it. My crazy alpha was blushing.

"You're blushing." I said softly and he scoffed and looked away.

"So?" He grumbled and for the first time I smiled at his cocky behavior. I gripped his shirt collar of his tank and he looked at me.

"It's cute." I whispered and he smiled. His hands gripped my waist and he sighed before laying his forehead against mine.

"I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you. I had a difficult childhood as well but that doesn't justify what I did to you." His vice was thick with shame and it broke my heart.

"What happened?" I asked and Clayton sighed.

"At fifteen... I killed my father." He said softly and I frowned and looked at him in bewilderment.

"Why?" I chocked out and he growled and hugged me tight.

"He abused my mother and she died because of it." He sighed and I didn't know what to think except: What is up with this family?

"Woah... Okay..." I didn't really know what to say I mean-what do you say to that?

"Okay?" He chuckled and met my eyes. The red was faded, "I guess that's better than you calling me a monster and leaving." My mate added with a soft bitter smile.

"So when Hunter hurt Lexi... Why go to so much extent to kill him?" My mate froze at my words but after a bit he relaxed.

"So she told you... I did that because he knew exactly what he was doing to her. Yet he did it anyways. He bedded her then left her saying she wasn't enough pleasure for him." He growled and I saw red coming to his eyes again. I laid a hand on his cheek and he calmed. I smiled at the affect I had on him.

"Don't be mad anymore." I sighed and leaned closer. His breath fanned my lips when he spoke.

"As long as you're around to stop the madness I'll be fine." He whispered and my face heated. I slowly wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him slightly closer.

"That's good to know." I sighed and Clayton glanced at my lips and chuckled nervously. I furrowed my brows together and sighed.

"What's wrong?" Clayton said softly and I glanced at his teasing, pink, parted, plump, luscious lips. My gaze went back to his eyes. My lips tingled and body ached for him.

"I- just kiss me already." I meant to sigh but it came out in a moan. Clayton grinned and his lips barely touched mine before he pulled away and I whined in disappointment.

"I don't know if I should... It might get out of hand." Clayton said and I pulled away from him. This was torturous.

"Fine. I'll be in sitting on my bed." I sighed and started to get up. I needed to think. Clayton frowned and grabbed my wrists. He looked at me and tilted his head with a lopsided smirk.

He pulled me to him and grabbed my waist. Sparks were running through me and I sighed. His smirk widened and he looked at my lips and then my eyes.

"The only thing you should be sitting on is me." Clayton said softly and pressed his lips against mine. Sparks overwhelmed me and I melted into his sweet lips. He gave me soft tentative kisses at first as if he were scared that he would hurt me but it slowly gained fervor and soon he had my legs straddling him as he deepened the kiss. I moaned in ecstasy as his tongue explored my mouth and met with mine in pure bliss. I giggled as he laid back on his bed and pulled me on top of him never once breaking the kiss. Finally after what seemed like forever we pulled away for air.

"I love you." I moaned and Clayton smiled. His lips were damp from kissing me and I grinned.

"I love you too." Clayton groaned and kissed me again. I gasped as his waist pressed against mine and I felt an obvious difference in his pants. We both moaned at the feeling of desire gripping us and Clayton kissed me harder. He growled softly as he moved his hips against mine and we both moaned again.

"Clayton." I gasped and he pulled away from the kiss and looked at me with loving eyes.

"Yes?" He said softly. I didn't know what to say at first. He smiled softly and sighed, "I won't make love to you tonight, if that's what you want." Clayton kissed my lips softly and added, "Just don't tempt me too much. You're making things really hard on me." He winked and chuckled.

I giggled and he kissed me again before wrapping me in his arms and sighing. I smiled and laid my head in the crook of his neck.

"I never thought I'd have a mate... I'm happy I have you Kate. Words cannot describe how much I adore you." Clayton whispered in my ear and I smiled.

"I like you like this Clayton please stay like this." I sighed.

"For you baby." He said softly and kissed my head. I smiled and he pulled the covers over us and hugged me to him.

"Goodnight Kate." My mate sighed.

"Goodnight Clay." I breathed and he chuckled softly. I closed my eyes and fell into a lovely sleep.