Chapter 15: Imprisoned(4)

The tower was really high the point in all of Sparta.

When you stood on the balcony the world looked like a toy set that you could play with. Helenos could see the training grounds where the female soldiers were marching around in the morning sun.

The bronze armor they wore was shining like sparks that were angry.

He could see the ocean it was a flat blue sheet that went all the way back to a place called Mycenae. The ocean and the tower and the city of Sparta all looked really beautiful from up high. The tower, in Sparta was a thing to see.

He knew he was from Mycenae. But the name Mycenae did not feel like home to him anymore.

It just felt like a word he had read in a book a time ago. He had been in the tower, for a days now and the world below was already starting to feel like a dream. It was a dream he was waking up from. It was a really strange feeling.

***

Someone might have said to Helenos "You are staring at your hands again Helenos."

No. Someone must have.

They had to. They had to. The only explanation left was that or hallucination. He was not. He was not hallucinating.

"Helenos"

He did not have to turn around to know it was Queen Menelaia.

Helenos whispered to Menelaia "I feel like I am missing something." His voice sounded really weak like it was going to break.

"I keep seeing things Menelaia " Helenos said. "When the sun goes down I see a womans face in the shadows. The woman has grey eyes. She sounds really strict. She always tells me to stand up. She tells me to move my feet. She tells me to hold something that's long and heavy.. When I blink my eyes the woman is gone. It feels so real Menelaia. The woman feels so real. Is she real?"

Menelaia sighed.

She got up.

Walked around the chair to face Helenos. She put her hands on his face. Her hands were really cold even though it was hot outside in the afternoon. "No Helenos. We have talked about this before. You are just seeing things that're not real. Your mind is playing tricks on you. The trip from Mycenae was very long and hard for you. You are a man, and men can get really upset sometimes."

Am I sick? Am I hallucinating?

He felt something, in his throat. Helenos did not want to be sick. Helenos wanted to be the person Helenos felt he used to be. Helenos could not remember who that person was.

Menelaia rubbed her thumb over his cheek. She had brought someone to help him. These hallucinations were really bothering him.

Menelaia did not want that.

Menelaia wanted the hallucinations to stop so he could be quiet and safe.

Menelaia wanted him to be okay.

Yes. She wasn't lying. She just wanted him to be fine.

***

She snapped her fingers and a woman came into the room.

"This is Thaila. She has been around for a time as a healer. She has made a tea for you. This tea will help you. It will stop you from seeing those eyed women. You will not have those thoughts anymore. You will not walk in your sleep. The tea will clear your head. It will help you with the hallucinations. The tea is special. It is what you need to feel better.

Helenos looked at Thaila

Thaila did not look at Menelaia.

She looked straight at Helenos.

Thaila gave a wooden bowl to him.

"Drink". She sounded really hoarse. Her voice was not smooth all. It was scratchy. It was...

Menelaia kept an eye on him as he picked up the cup.

Helenos took a sip of the liquid. It tasted bad like metal. Then he felt a chill all over him. His heart started beating. Everything around him started to look a bit darker and a bit harder to see.

The hallucination cure was working. It was making his brain feel really slow and very sleepy. The face of the woman with grey eyes was fading away into the fog. He could not see her face clearly anymore. No. she wasn't there the whole time

He did not feel like he needed to hold a sword. The feeling that he should be holding a sword was gone.

The urge to run away seemed like an idea that was far away.

The voice in his brain the one that kept telling him about a world with electricity and big glass buildings was quiet now. The voicein his brain was not bothering him anymore. The woman with grey eyes and the voice, in his brain were both going back away.

"I have meetings with the generals. The world is a scary place, Helenos. There are people there who want to hurt you because you are sick. You will be okay here, in the tower. Thaila will stay with you. Keep you safe. Only listen to what I am saying because I am trying to help you."

"Yes..."

She walked out. Helenos was trapped inside now... no... he was safe inside.

He just sat there looking at the tea in front of him. His head felt really weird like it was getting filled up with sand.

Thaila said quietly but with a lot of anger "You are not seeing things that are not really there."

Helenos looked at her.

Blinked.

He could not see things clearly.

"The Menelaia says that I am. She says my mind is not working properly. She says my grey eyes are not really mine."

Thaila stepped closer to him. She took the cup from his hand. Threw the rest of the tea out the window of the balcony.

"I was your teacher in Mycenae " she said in an fast voice. "I taught you about the stars and the maps that you used to navigate. I know how your mind works, Helenos. You are not sick. The tea is making you forget who you are. This tea is not going to make you better. It is going to erase your memories and your thoughts, Helenos. This thing is meant to make you stop thinking so you will stay in this room.

Helenos felt unhappy. He was feeling very confused. He was trying to think but it was like trying to walk through a big pool of water. He said "Mycenae I know that name. I remember a library, with walls made of stone and it smelled like old books. But you I do not see you in my memories they are all foggy."

Thaila grabbed his arm tight. It was a lot different, from the Queens touch, which was always so cold. "You do not see me because they are doing something to make you forget everything " Thaila said. She looked at Helenos. "Helenos why do you feel so empty inside? Why do you get the feeling that Helenos is supposed to be else? Helenos why do your hands feel like they are waiting for something to hold something that Helenos is supposed to hold?"

Helenos whispered

"I don't know."

He felt a bad pain in his head. There was a voice inside him it was screaming. Helenos could not hear the voice clearly. It sounded like the voice was coming from underwater.

"I just want the pain to stop".

Menelaia had told him that drinking tea would make the pain go away. She also said that the strange things he saw the hallucinations.

Helenos wanted the pain to go away.

"The Queen is the one who is causing all this pain." Thaila said. She looked really upset like she wanted to grab him and shake some sense into him. "The Queen wants you to think that you're going crazy so he will never even try to leave this tower. She wants you to doubt that you're memories are not real.

Helenos tried to stand up. His knees felt really weak. He said "I am supposed to be... Helenos is supposed to be here. She told Helenos that Helenos is the Prince. This room belongs to Helenos it is his room. Helenos is me. I am Helenos."

"Is this really a room if you cannot leave it?" Thaila asked. She put her hand into her robe.

She pulled out an old bronze coin. The coin was dirty. It had dents all over it.

"I can help you get out of this place Helenos," Thaila said. "I have a ship that is waiting for us at the docks. We can sail to the islands, Helenos. Leave this place behind."

"We can go to a place where nobody thinks you are weird for not knowing who you are. You can be a person again and remember who you are, without people calling you sick."

Helenos looked at the coin.

He felt the pull of her words.

The numbness was taking over.

The idea of a ship, of running of being a person it all sounded too difficult. It sounded frightening.

In this room, Helenos had everything he needed.

In this room, he did not have to think about the voice in his brain where his old life... no... hallucination lived.

The voice in his brain was something Helenos did not like to feel.

"I think you are wrong " Helenos said. His voice sounded far away and slow. He leaned back in his ivory chair. Let out a sigh. His arms felt super heavy like they were made of lead or something.

"The Queen tells me that the things I remember are bad dreams " Helenos said. "She says I am fragile, that the world outside is too much for me to handle. She says I am safe here. I think she is right. The tea helps me to feel better it makes the voices in my head go away. I like it when it is quiet, Thaila. The quiet is nicer. I like the quiet."

Thaila said to me "The voice in your head is your memories from Mycenae." She looked like she was going to cry.

"It makes you, you, Helenos"

He does not want to be Helenos if it hurts.

His eyes started to close. He said he just wants to sleep. The Queen says sleep is good, for Helenos. The Queen says she is the one who can protect Helenos from the things Helenos sees.

***

Thaila looked at him. She knew that Menelaia was getting what she wanted.

"I will leave this coin."

She put the bronze coin under his silk pillow. "If you ever figure things out if you ever understand that you are not the one who is sick then look for the coin, Helenos. Look for this coin."

The door creaked open. The Spartan guards were, on their way to take the healer away.

The guard took a quick (long glance) at helenos.

The lead guard asked if the patient was calm.

"He is calm now." Her face went back to looking cold and serious.

The guards took Thaila away.

***

Helenos was by himself. The room was really quiet. The only sound was Helenos breathing slowly.

He looked out. He saw a bird flying past the balcony. The bird was up high in the sky.

Helenos thought about the bird. He wondered if the bird was seeing things that were not real, like he was.. Or maybe the bird was flying around.

This thought went away quickly. Helenos closed his eyes. He felt the sun, on his skin.

He did not think about the coin that was under his pillow.

He also did not think about the voice in his head.