CHAPTER 28: Sinful Kiss

CLAIRE’s P.O.V.

“Wife...”

His eyes were now open, not wide enough but I know that he can see me.

“Am I d-dreaming?” he asked, smiling to himself. “You look beautiful as ever... I’m sorry for hurting you... I’m sorry...”

I stiffened as he slowly brushed his fingers to my cheeks, wiping my tears away. Is this true? I felt guilty for a moment, knowing that I didn’t listen to him earlier... I should have patiently waited for his response. I shouldn’t have let my stupid emotions get in the way of our relationship.

“Please don’t cry...”

“Claire! The cab is ready!” Elijah rushed to us.

Darren slowly drowned off to sleep again. I help Elijah assist him inside of the cab. We’re both quiet the whole trip, no one wants to utter another word. Until finally, we reached the Herrera residence.

As the maids help us to bring Darren to his room, Elijah finally found his tongue again and talk to me.

“I’m sorry for disturbing you, Claire. I just didn’t know what to do anymore. Do you want me to take you home?” he asked.

“That’s fine... And I can take care of myself. You can go now, Elijah... I’m staying here for a moment.”

He nodded, before stepping in to his car. I waved at him, his vehicle moving away from my direction. After that, I decided to climb up the stairs to see Darren. He’s still there, laying unconsciously on his bed.

I got some clothes from his closet before removing his current attire. I also asked the maids for some basin with cold water and a towel for him. Gladly, they provided it all without any hesitation.

After I fixed him up, I decided to went home already. Maybe Dad is already wondering right now where on the earth I could be. Also, I don’t want to be here when Darren wakes up.

“Please take care of him... I need to went home right now,” I told to one of their maids.

“Mrs. Herrera? Why are you going home? Did Sir Darren and you fought that bad?” they asked curiously.

“Maybe... I’m sorry but I couldn’t tell any more details to all of you... I just... I need to get going.”

They nodded their heads before letting me leave the house. I’m sure that Darren will also find out about me coming over to Herrera residence because if their maids. Though it didn’t bother me that much.

When I got home, Dad and Alexa are now eating dinner. They invited me to eat and I’m glad that Dad didn’t ask anything about what happened yet.

After Alexa finished her meal, Dad finally got the chance he needs to ask me about what happened. I thought that he would be mad at me again, but he didn’t.

“I’m sorry for telling lies, Dad.”

“You don’t have to be sorry. Before you ask for my permission, I already knew that something is up. But still, I let you do what you want. It’s your life, anyway. Though I still didn’t want to see you regretting all of this in the end...”

I looked down, feeling guilty for my Dad and sorry for myself. What if Darren doesn’t really love me? But what if he does? I don’t know what to believe anymore.

Monday passed. It’s already Tuesday and despite the fact that rain had poured heavily yesterday, the surroundings were now bright and sunny. It is perfect to have a walk on the park or something... But I couldn’t do it, for one main reason. That park wasn’t just a place for me to relax now... It was a special place for Darren and I.

“Claire!” I heard Alexa’s voice as she pounded over my room’s door.

I stood up and opened it for her. I saw her raising one of her brows, and suddenly, I got confused.

“What is it?”

“Someone is looking for you.” She looked terribly mad.

“Who is it?”

“He said that he’s your high school friend, but I don’t like him. Did Darren and you broke up? I badly wanted to see him... Please Claire, don’t talk to the guy in the kitchen...” she whispered.

That statement got me confused some more. And who is this guy she’s telling me about? I stepped out of my room, walking towards our kitchen. I was shocked at first when I saw him, but it also vanished after a few seconds... Of course he’ll visit me after what happened yesterday. This guy doesn’t accept defeat.

“Claire! You’re awake. You have a visitor,” Dad said, motioning me to come closer to them.

I walk slowly, as Gabriel turned his head towards me. He smiled, and I try to do the same. I sat beside my Dad who’s now currently drinking his milk.

“I’ll leave you two alone to talk,” he stated before pushing his own wheelchair away from us.

“Why are you here?” I frankly asked to Gabriel.

“Whoa. Seems like you don’t want me here... I just want to know if you’re fine now.”

“Whatever it is that Dad told you about, please don’t believe it.”

“He didn’t say anything to me. Why, Claire? Do I have something to know about?”

I look away, annoyed.

“What do you want?”

“I’m here to bid my final good bye to you... And also to Kate. I’m going back abroad. Whatever it is that happened before, please forgive me... I ruined your friendship... I’m very sorry, Claire.”

“You are forgiven,” I stated, emotionless.

“That doesn’t sound like forgiveness.”

“Oh please, Gab. Just tell me what you really want.”

“Proved to me that you already forgave me. Cause I can’t bare my conscience anymore if I went back abroad without apologizing to you and to your best friend.”

“And how exactly do you want me to prove it?”

“Let’s go out together.” I laughed bitterly.

“Why, Gab? Is my words isn’t enough for you to believe in me?”

“I do believe in you... But I still couldn’t forgive myself for ruining something special to you before...” He looked down.

I felt guilty. I bit my lower lip, trying to analyze what will I do now.

“Please, Claire...” he pleaded.

“Fine. Just one day and promised me that you’ll believe after that.”

“Fine.”

We shook our hands as I sign of a deal. Then I remembered the time that Kate and I also made a deal before. And it didn’t turn out that well. Maybe... Just maybe, same things wouldn’t happen to me and Gabriel.

I prepared myself in order to join him to wherever place that he wants to go. I just let him take the lead while some important thoughts are crossing my mind. What if... What if Darren saw us? Will he be jealous again? Or not? I highly doubt it.

“What are you thinking?” he asked while parking his car at the small lot outside a coffee shop.

“Nothing. Let’s just get this over with,” I coldly answered.

“Fine.”

And with that, we entered into the shop to have something to eat. I don’t know what’s with him but he kept staring at me like I was some kind of freak.

“Do you mind looking away from me?” I sarcastically said.

“Sorry. I just... I can’t help it.”

“Gab... I already told you this before. We’re only friends. Nothing more, nothing less. But you are still pushing it. Look at what happened to me and my best friend... Now Kate and I aren’t even talking to each other anymore. And she loathed me so much to the point that she’ll do anything to prevent me from being happy...”

“I’m sorry... I didn’t know that I could ruin your friendship that time that I decided to confess to you.”

I stare at him, bowing his head down as a sign of apology. I just nodded and gave him a thrift smile. Gladly, he did the same and we started helping ourselves with the delicious foods on our table.

After we ate, he said that he wanted to walk around somewhere else. We go to the park, a different park. Not the place that Darren and I often went before. I don’t want to bring another man out there. That place is very special for the both of us.

I shuddered as I felt Gabriel’s hand on mine. I tried to remove it but he only tighten his grip much more.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Claire... I know that it’s all my fault that your friendship with Kate was now broken... But... I can’t help it. I’m still in love with you, Claire. After all these years. I came back to this country only for you to see that I’m the right man for you. Can’t you see? I’m still chasing you, Claire. Why can’t it be me?”

I look at him, confused. He told me that he wanted to have a day with me for our closure... But... He just opened another cause for wounds again. Even I cannot answer his questions... Why can’t I love him back? If only that is how love works, then no one will be left with shattered hearts.

“I’m sorry, Gab. I’m still not into you.”

“Why?!” he anxiously asked. “Am I not enough? I may not be as rich as Darren but I can be the man you deserve.”

“That’s exactly the reason, Gab. It’s Darren. I’m already married so I cannot love you back anymore.”

“You two are not married.”

I was shocked, processing his words.

“You’re hilarious. Of course we are!”

“Fucking no! I already knew about it, Claire! So please, just please... Stop lying to me and tell me the truth. Do you love that guy?!”

“How did you knew about it?”

He closed his fist, ignoring my question.

“That’s not important anymore. Just answer my question, Claire.”

He put his hands on my shoulder, looking at me straight in the eyes. I look away, trying to suppress my tears. Every time that I remember his name... The pain is still coming back to me.

“I do... Even if he didn’t feel the same way about me, Gab. I do love him.” He look at me unbelievably before shaking his head.

“Fuck no.”

He kissed me roughly, and because I didn’t see it coming, I wasn’t prepared and for a moment, I don’t know what to do. This is wrong. This is nothing but a sinful kiss. That’s what I realized before pushing him away from me.

“Stop it, Gab!” I shouted to his face.

I saw his tears streaming down to his cheeks.

“Why not me, Claire? I’ve been loving you since high school. Why can’t you just do the same?”

“Gab... I’m sorry...”

I managed to raised and put my trembling hand to his shoulder. He’s currently crying, and I knew for a fact that it was all because of me.

“I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings... I just... I can’t love you back. I befriended you before because I wanted you to be close to my best friend. I always wanted Kate to be happy...”

“How about me, Claire? Did you ever asked me what makes me happy?”

I swallowed a lump, looking at his melancholic face.

“I’m so sorry, Gab.”

“Well I guess that life is really that unfair... I came back here for you... But there’s no point in staying here right now after you finally told me the truth. That you love your fake husband...”

I burst out into tears. Hearing the word fake... Yeah, everything was just fake between the two of us.

“Hey...”

Now it’s his turn to look at me with pity in his eyes. He put his hands around me and hug me tight.

“Love hurts, isn’t it? Why can’t we just get what we wanted? Why do we have to suffer like this?”

Those questions of him are the things I keep on asking myself too. Why can’t it be just like that? Why does love has to be so complicated?

“Come on... I’m taking you home.”

I nodded, letting him help me hopped inside of his car. As we leave that place, I decided that when I saw Darren again, I will let him explain himself first before saying anything.