DIVE IN HARD

Elena's POV:

"I have a feeling you're going back to Damon," Derek said.

"I don't believe I can. He believed the rumours over me. He let me die instead of letting me explain. He never gave me the chance to for the sake of his reputation." I stated. "Going back to him is the last thing on my mind." I looked at Derek and he looked hesitant.

"That was the reason I didn't want you to recover your memories. You'd get hurt. And now I don't even know what to expect since you have them now."

"Perhaps it's just better to restart my life. I don't want to think about the past. I believe Antonio has moved on with his as well and doesn't need me back." I sighed while Derek stared at me.

"Did he tell you everything you said in there?" He questioned and I shook my head.

"I never depended on Antonio for information. I always did mine without him. He never knew though, never suspected. Being a femme fatale, I knew things had to change with me." I said.

"What you mean, is that you were pretending to be scared all along. You did everything just to avenge who exactly?"

"My mother and uncle. But the man who killed them is dead."

"So what are you living for now?"

"Myself. There's no one I'm chasing after anymore. There's no mission either anymore. My father was my main target, and now that we've had him, I see no reason to fight anymore. I just have to be on my own now." I said and Derek even though he said nothing, seemed to be in support of that. "I guess he already hurt me too much and that shows he didn't care about me all those while I thought he did. He only did that because he thought me useful."

"What life do you want to begin now?"

"Just a normal life. A life I've always wanted to live since when I was a child. I don't know what it means to live like ordinary people. My life hasn't been ordinary. But that's how I want to live. No worries, issues, just me and myself working to make a living and be happy. I don't want to be anyone's slut." I said, more to myself than to him. I raised my gaze to Derek and we stared at each other for so long it made me somewhat shy. "In Antonio's life, you are the villain. In your life, Antonio is the villain. But both of you have unsaid histories that made you the way you both are today. Antonio's hate towards you is due to his misunderstanding. Your hate towards him is just a pretence. You both need people who can understand you and I guess that's the main reason you both are attracted to me. I don't question what you do, I adapt to it because I understand where you both are coming from. But which one of you has tried to understand me? You might go out of your way to protect me, but have you ever asked yourself why?" My words had him contemplating.

"You're wrong. My attraction towards you has never been defined by you not being questioned. At first, I thought you were too good for Damon. I didn't believe he would treat you right. I wanted to protect you at all costs away from him because I perceived you as innocent. You seemed to be. And when I saw how fragile you were, all I knew was that I wanted to have you. At the club, when you were drunk, I took advantage of the fact that you thought I was Damon. I knew we looked alike, and I didn't care what he thought about me. He hated me, so what exactly was the point? I was going to claim you the moment you became unconscious, but he arrived. You're not as innocent as you look, but your fragility can faze many men." He stroked my hair. "You want to live a normal life? I won't stop you from doing that. We men have always gotten in your way. You can take my penthouse and live there. Don't worry, nobody knows about it, I barely go there. If you want an ordinary life, full of riches and where you don't have to worry about anyone pursuing or standing in your way, you can live in the penthouse."

"I appreciate it but I can't..."

"No. There's no other safe place. The mafias are still trying to track you and they know you can't escape if you want to live with the rest of the city. You need to trust me on this one. The penthouse is the safest place for you." He said and I nodded. "You can leave today if you want." He said and patted me on the shoulder before getting up to leave. I watched him as he left the room before laying my back on the bed. I sighed because the life I wanted to live seemed so unfamiliar to the kind of life I'd lived in the past. They were always filled with trouble and insane problems. I never knew how it was or what it meant to have peace. But now I did, and too much peace just made me want to shut myself out from the world. I counted the ceilings as I lay on my back, wondering what Antonio was doing now and how he was faring. It was funny how he didn't even seem to be worried about me or anything. Or else he would have come for me. But I was wrong, he'd never come. He cared more about power than he did me. He poisoned me and wanted me to die so he wouldn't have to bear the shame that befell me. The fall made his rivals smile and that was what they'd been looking for to bring him down. I didn't blame him though. It was just the time for me to move on and never look back.

Goodbye, Antonio.