Chapter 22

DAVID AWOKE WITHOUT WARNING, heart pounding and body shaking as faint sheens of cold sweat slipped down from his face and rested on his naked torso.

After a second or two of waiting for his breathing rate to steady, he rubbed his eyes and strained into the utter darkness, propping his weight on his elbows so that they boosted him into a sitting position.

"David.." Dawn mumbled in her sleep, disturbed by his shivering and heaving breaths.

"I'm here baby" he whispered back, stroking her hair gently until she fell back to sleep and when she did, he slipped out of bed, chancing a glance at the clock before tossing on a shirt and deciding to go for a walk.

On his way to wherever his spirit led, he couldn't help but think about the dream he had and how it was correlated with Amanda. It was strange to have a dream about his mother, he had thought about her an awful lot today, maybe it was because he couldn't get the look on her face out of his mind.

He was very well aware that he hurt her feelings, though it might have slipped out of rage, it was still the worst thing to say to a woman who raised him and cared for him as her own.

But still, he just wanted her to understand how precious Dawn was to him. He wanted her to see how precious they both were but just like himself, Amanda was hard-headed and in this case, the apple didn't fall far from the tree.

With a decisive turn, he placed his hand in his pocket and climbed the stairs leading to the archive located on the top floor of the building.

She must have been so heartbroken that she missed the wedding she had singlehandedly planned. He needed to apologize. Women were a dramatic lot. Who knew what she would do-

He stopped short, just two doors away from the archive and one away from the music room.

He had heard something, except that he wasn't quite certain what it was but it did sound like a melody.

He craned his neck forward and listened. It was a song, a native song only people in their 50s would know. He looked in through the door slightly left ajar. It was his mother, sitting by the piano and singing softly to herself.

His first inclination was to walk forward and approach her but he held still, listening and translating the little he could. It was a sad love song. A song to her lost lover.

He pressed his ear against the door, not wanting to open it as his mother might notice and stop but the door slightly opened as it came in contact with the side of his face.

"Who's there?" Amanda shot immediately and David reeled back instantly, cursing at his clumsiness.

"Show your face before I call the security guards" she demanded and David cleared his throat before walking inside.

"David?" She said, quite surprised but pleased.

David straightened his face, he parted his lips to speak but paused when he caught a glimpse of the catheter fixed on her right wrist.

Amanda hid the hand behind her back and looked away, knowing what was going to come next.

"Did you have another phase?" He asked pointedly and she nodded with a slight hum.

"And why wasn't I informed of this?"

"I asked them not to" she raised her gaze off the floor and looked at him. "I didn't want to ruin your stay more than I already have "

That look on her face... David sighed and rubbed his head. When it came to the two women in his life, he was powerless.

"I've told you several times...mother, you shouldn't play with your health. You need to be more careful and stop overworking your self"

She smiled warmly. "I didn't think you cared"

"I might be mad at you but surely I don't want you dead, and why are you out here all alone?"

"I couldn't sleep. I'm guessing you couldn't too"

He sighed and rubbed his head. She was right. He couldn't.

She tapped on the space beside her. "Seat with me for a while" she urged.

"I can't" he bellowed "I need to get back to my wife"

"It will just take a little time, I promise"

David paused and stared at her for the longest time, his eyes searched hers and when he didn't find what he was looking for, he sighed and crossed the room to her side.

There was a short ripple of silence but luckily, Amanda, saved their awkward silence from going to monumental proportions by asking "How is Dawn?"

"There's no need to pretend that you care" he snorted, he didn't look the least bit fooled by the air of innocence his mother was trying to convey, he knew her too well.

"Well I do care"

He swung his gaze over to her "Since when?"

Ananda smiled "since I realized how much you love her. What is she like? Tell me about her"

"You don't have to force it"

"I want to know" she urged and David straightened his shoulders, delighted by the topic of discussion.

He wasn't exactly certain how one could describe her. Her features were exotic, she had a shapely figure, an imp-thin body with a wasp waist and glossy completion but that wasn't all, she was the kind of woman that carried herself with class, she was submissive, morally challenging, there was intelligence in her eyes, curiosity in the way she clocked her head to the side. She was unique in the most beautiful way.

He smiled. "She's an amazing woman mother — a little too over the edge sometimes but she's empathetic and genuine. The kind of woman who puts effort in you. She's the type who tends to believe that everyone deserves second chances, I guess that's why I got attracted to her in the first place"

His smile widened as he looked up at the ceiling as if lost in his own thoughts.

"She always believed there was more to me than just a lothario and truthfully she discovered parts of me I never knew existed"

"You must really love her" Amanda smiled to herself. How had she not realized this?

"I don't think there's the right adjective to describe how I feel about her, I'd idolize her but she's more than a queen to me, what I feel... Even I can't comprehend it and I don't know how to make it clear" he chuckled, letting himself relax on the chair.

"I understand what you feel" she released a soft sigh. "That unusual optimism you feel whenever she's around. The permanent ache in your chest that increases whenever she cries, the butterflies you get whenever she laughs at your jokes and smiles at you even after you say the most absurd things"

She turned.

"That intense craving to protect her, the constant worry and insecurity, the desire to draw her close and hold her till both your body and soul become one"

When she stopped talking, David just stared at her. He had never seen this part of his mother before and frankly, he was mesmerized, she had always been so uptight and detailed that it seemed odd or rather unthinkable that she'd have the slightest idea of what he felt - of what love meant.

"I too was once In love" she chuckled bitterly, noticing his look of confusion. "Well that is before I wedded your father"

David instinctively leaned closer - an instant yearning to know more making him relax beside her.

"Fabian was his name, I encountered him a few times at the pub, he was a singer and pianist, his songs we're marvelous and he played my favorite every night by 8:pm at royal Harvey, pub- 'ne me quitte pas' a song that still lingers in my heart" she rested her back against the chair and placed a hand on her cheat

"Je t'offrirai des perles de pluie, venues de pays où il ne pleut past.(I will give you rain pearls, from countries where it does not rain)" She sang, every word coming from her heart, and David watched her with every bit of admiration.

"Back then I always forced Amelia to come listen with me and although she declined, her Sister complexity never allowed her leave me to my self, we usually snuck out through the kitchen emergency door and took a taxi to the pub where we'd stay up all night listening to his songs that somehow made my heart thump intensely for him"

She parted her lips to speak but paused and took a deep breath instead. These were memories long buried, memories she was forced to forget and David understood how painful it was bringing it back to light.

"After Luther began courting your mother she no longer had time to watch with me so I went alone and stayed there listening to him till everyone else was gone and it was only us left. Eventually, we had a chance to talk and he had the most charming voice I'd ever heard, he was British but there was something about him that made him, even more, foreign - unique even"

There was a far-off look on her face as if she was reliving the moment.

"Every night we talked and bonded like we'd known each other for years, he invited me out to hang out with his band and went as far as introducing me to his parents. We were in love, hopelessly In love but I knew that father would never let me settle for a mere pub player, our status as the Medichies carried along a lot of responsibility and weight. I couldn't choose who I loved. These things only ever happened and it was unfortunate that mine had to be unethical"

She exhaled and smiled at David sadly. At this point, his expression had softened and all he wanted to do now was pull her into a comforting hug.

"We continued our affair and most times I spent a week or two at his place, he proposed and I said yes, we were going to run away together and leave everything behind but then your mother died and I fell apart, I could've been there for her, if I had made it in time she wouldn't have bled to death but I wasn't there instead I planned to run away, it was foolish of me and I blamed my self for her death but after meeting you it all changed. You were just 5 months old when I cradled you in my arms for the first time and I fell in love with those winter grey eyes"

She smiled, running a hand through his face and David didn't oppose, as a matter of fact, he drew even closer.

"I ended things with Fabian and you can guess how miserable life was after that but I had you so that was enough. The arrangement was made and I was set to remarry Luther, he was a nice man but I knew things weren't going to be the same as having Amelia around but it didn't matter I was doing it for you anyway"

Amanda paused but after a moment, she shrugged.

"A week to our wedding I found out that I was pregnant with Fabian's child"

David looked up, his eyes widening in shock. "Mother..."

She took a deep breath and smiled a little. "I didn't think too much about it, I just did what needed to be done and I let it go believing in the greater good and that was where I lost my womb but it was a small price to pay, I had you, after all, you were all that mattered to me, you were my redemption, the only thing that kept me going and I was ready to give my all for you...I still am"

She sniffed the moment she realized her tears had begun to fall.

David felt his heart ache, he was breathless, simply out of words

"I'm sorry if I caused you pain, I'm sorry for hurting Dawn," she said, even if she knew her words weren't enough. "I guess I was a little jealous that I wasn't the one making you smile anymore. I wasn't the one you ran to whenever you got hurt and depressed, it was selfish of me to believe no one could love you as I do but I was wrong, Dawn is different and now I see it"

"Mother..." David said, doing the only thing his instincts told him to do. He hugged her.

"It gets lonely around here and-" she choked on her words but barely paused before continuing " I just really miss my baby boy" she clutched his shoulders, her tears soaking into his shirt.

"I'm here mother," he assured, pulling back so he could see her face. "I'm here for you and I'll never stop being your little boy, I love you mum. I'm sorry for making you cry"

How had he not realized this?

Over the years of his marriage, she never once showed dissatisfaction, if anything, it was his fault for not realizing this sooner.

Amanda reached up and touched the tears on his face. Time passed, maybe minutes, maybe hours, they were both engrossed in their feelings that they lost sense of time. It was certainly a night filled with uncaged emotions and David realized how blessed he was to have this woman in his life.