Chapter 37

"YOU'RE GOOD AT BEING A MOTHER."

Stella paused and looked up from her meal with surprise in her eyes.

David chuckled softly and wiped the corner of his lips with a handkerchief.  "You've done a pretty good job raising Alex on your own and I realize I've never actually thanked you for it"

Surprised at his compliment, she smiled, tucking her hair behind her ear as a show of shyness. "Thank you, David. That means a lot to me coming from you"

David nodded and smiled.

For a while, they ate dinner and David realized, he had forgotten how easy it was to speak to her. It had been years since they had any conversation this long and to some extent, he enjoyed her company and wished he had done it sooner.

After they finished their meal, he poured them both a glass of wine.

"Thank you," Stella said, stirring the glass in her hand. "I haven't had such good wine in a long time"

David nodded and downed his glass. "Then maybe I'll buy you a whole wine store after all this is over"

She chuckled softly and they suddenly went quiet, both sipping their drinks and enjoying the scenery until David finally spoke.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," Stella said, placing her glass on the table island.

"Was Stacey ever happy... I mean after I left?"

It was a question he'd spent the better part of five years wondering about.

Was Stacey happy?

The thought of it usually kept him up most nights and now that she went from a distant memory to a reoccurring nightmare, it only worsened— the fact that he had a role to play in her death ate him alive.

Stella blew out a breath and stared at her thighs as she spoke. "You know, now that I think about it, I remember the times Stacey wished she were dead. She'd trash around the house and throw a fit because she was devastated and felt alone."

She looked up at him and smiled.

"But I also remember countless times when she smiled and laughed. She was happy David. The thought of carrying your child brought her joy. Alex was her last thread of hope for her and that is why I cannot afford to lose him"

David smiled. "You won't lose him, I promise"

She chuckled softly. "She missed you David, and she waited for you but you never came back"

Guilt washed over his face. "I'm sorry Stella..."

"It's fine" she sniffed and picked up and hand cloth to wipe the corner of her eyes. "You know, Stacey actually knew she was going to die"

"She did?"

She nodded. "I couldn't stop her even if I tried. The doctors had warned her, told her that her chances of survival were slim but she did it anyway"

"Why? Why did she do it?"

Stella picked up her glass and smile but it was sad and her heartbreak glimmered in her eyes. "It's not easy for a mother to get rid of their own child David, it does things to you, mental and emotional things" she sighed. "But I guess I'll never understand it until I have a child of my own"

"Stella"

"It's fine" she sniffed again. "I'm fine, I promise." she smiled. "If you want some closure you should visit her grave some time. It'll help you feel much better"

David nodded and parted his lips to speak but the door suddenly whooshed open and he automatically turned, meeting the dark gaze of Paula who stormed towards his table.

"David!" she yelled and before he had a chance to utter a word, she slapped him, so hard that Stella was forced to release a gasp.

"You fool. Cheating lying scumbag!" She snapped, slapping him across the face again but David didn't as much as flinch.

"You know I never liked you because men like you are dirt, clowns who can't keep their pants in order. I never really understood what Dawn saw in a piece of shit like you!"

David remained quiet, his face to the ground and his hand fisted to the side as they tried not to act out and slap her face into a wall.

"Say something, you moron!" She yelled, hitting his chest with all the energy she'd mustered.

"Will you please stop it!" Stella finally yelled and Paula turned her attention to her.

"And aren't you the big slut?"

"I don't care what you call me but you are taking this too far, if you touch David one more time I won't hesitate to call security"

"It amazes me how you can be so brazen after destroying my sisters' marriage, you homewrecker!"

"For what I know, Dawn destroyed her marriage with her own hands. David has done nothing wrong and I think it's you guys who need to sort yourself out"

"Why you!" She raised her hand but David stepped in front of her and held It firmly.

"Don't, Paula" he demanded, speaking for the first time.

She flung her hands away and chuckled bitterly. "Are you going to defend her?"

"It's me you're here for, not her"

She scoffed. "You are so rotten David, you and that stupid son of yours!"

He clenched his jaw. "I'll let this go because you have every right to be mad at me but don't you ever speak ill of my son again. I have been nothing but faithful to Dawn, yeah I lied and my best friend from five years ago had a child for me. That's it! I didn't cheat! I'm not a cheater so stop fucking treating me like one!"

"Look whose grown some balls" she laughed. "In my eyes, you'll always be a cheat David, a lousy unfortunate fuckboy. Rather than clinging to this fake life of yours, go home and make things right with my sister and your child she's carrying"

With that, she stormed off and disappeared behind the door.

"I'm sorry David, does it hurt?" Stella asked, examining his face.

David turned away. "It's fine. I have to go now"

Stella sighed. "I understand"

"I'll see you on the day of the surgery," he said and nodded at her before walking out.

***

LATER THAT NIGHT, just as the rain poured down in heavy revolts and soaked the city, Dawn sat on the sofa and stared into blank space with a cup of hot cocoa in her hand.

After her emotional spree with Amanda had ended, she returned to Becky's apartment, took a hot bath, and settled down with the thought of her husband clouding her mind.

The very thought of not being with him for this long made her sick to her stomach and the idea of not having him in her life was starting to hurt a little too much.

She placed the cup on the table and hugged her knees to her chest.

She'd seen him without his luxuries and his fanciness. She'd seen the man beneath all the sexiness. She'd seen the jester, the simp, the softie, and living easily without him was a whole lot scarier than the prospect of the fight to live with him.

She sniffed, but it didn't work. Tears burned her eyes and she wiped her cheeks, cleaning the beads that spilled from her eyes.

"Don't cry, Dawn..." She told herself but it was hurting her so much that she could only imagine what David had been going through. She couldn't even be mad at him anymore, after her talk with Amanda, it all felt useless and she admitted to herself that she missed him.

She didn't want to do it anymore.

She wanted him back, she wanted her husband back.

A knock on the front door made her quickly wipe away her tears.

She disentangled herself from her position and craned her neck towards the door. "Who is it?" She asked, sounding groggy.

When no reply came for over ten seconds, she walked to the door, and what she saw when she opened made her eyes wide.

"David?" She questioned, staring wide-eyed at him.

"Dawn..." he murmured, shivering as the rain continued to bit down his head and soak him.

"Oh my God, David what are you doing here!" She exclaimed, holding back from throwing herself in his arms and squeezing him tight.

"Dawn I'm sorry," he said, even though he knew his words could never be enough.

She sighed "let's not do this David. Go home" she urged, wanting to shut the door but he placed his hands on it, stopping her from doing so.

"You're my home, Dawn, you've always been and you still are"

"Stop your delusions and just leave" she begged, trying to shut the door but he held it firm.

"Yes it's true, once upon a time I loved Stacey, she was my best friend and I took things a little too far but it only happened once and when I left, we never met again"

"You don't have to explain to me David, I don't need it"

"Before I met you, I thought love was only for the delusional, I thought it was more or less a painful experience, only ever real if you're delirious"

He stepped forward, his eyes glowing with sincerity as the rain continued to do ruin to his body.

"Before you, my life was a mess. I  thought there was nothing more to living but women and whiskey, I'd lost my way.  but..." He choked on his words but he barely paused before he continued. "But when you came along everything changed, you became my heaven. Our marriage — this —us—  it became my safe heaven"

"David. I don't know what to say"

He looked into her eyes. "Say you won't leave me, say you'll come back home and be my wife again"

She looked away. "David…l—"

"I'd much rather die than have to live without you for the rest of my life and I don't care if I'm being delusional but it's the honest truth. I need you, Dawn. I've never said that to another woman in my life"

Dawn inhaled deeply, her eyes red with tears. "How can I believe a word you say when you've done nothing but hurt me?" She asked, her lower lip quivering as a tear slowly rolled down her cheek and settled in the corner of her lips.

"I know I don't deserve to be forgiven and it's selfish of me to even ask for it but I can't do this anymore. I want you. I want to be with you. I'm head over fucking heels about you, and I love you" he said, choking on his words "I don't even care if you feel the same way anymore, I love you and... and" he leaned forward and whispered, "I need you"

"Oh, David," she said and then did the only thing she could do. She closed the distance between them and hugged him so tight that it felt like he might die from suffocation.

The rain had poured on both their heads and Dawn had become wet but she didn't mind.

She loved him, and he loved her, and if there was anything more important in her world, it just didn't matter, not right there, not right then.