Chapter 25

“Of course,” Asher nods eagerly, and I realize my assumptions may be off. Either I misjudgedElizabeth or this is not about Asher’s lifestyle choices. Elizabeth storms back out, and I have a feeling the rest of the week is going to be very tense. I turn questioningly to Asher, and he says, “Let’s do something in town this afternoon. The three of us. I’ll explain then.”We’re sitting in the back corner booth of the old-dinner-turned-hipster-coffee-shop for maximum privacy, Paige next to me and Asher on the other side facing us. Asher is silent while we wait for our drinks to be called out. He’s fidgeting and avoiding my gaze so I know he thinks I’m not going to like this discussion.Once we all have our mugs in front of us, I prompt Asher, “So?” Under the table, Paige takes my hand and laces our fingers together. I don’t glance at her but I squeeze her hand in acknowledgment and thanks. “So,” Asher finally looks at me. “I was on the phone with Francesco this morning.” Francesco is a guy he met earlier in the year, and he and Asher have been eyeing and teasing each other since the beginning of the year. But I know Asher has been hesitant to go any further because Francesco is only here in exchange for a year.“I know you’ve been texting,” I say, when he doesn’t continue. He rakes his hands through his hair in that way he does when he’s trying to hide his fluster usually, about someone he likes. He doesn’t smile, though. “He’s been trying to find a way to stay after graduation.”“So, you’re thinking of giving it a shot?” This time, it’s Paige who prompts him. Asher finally smiles. “Yeah,” he sighs. “Yeah, I think I really like him, you know?”

“I do know.” I grin, but I don’t say more. I’m happy for him but this doesn’t tell us what happened.“Well,” Asher looks down at the table – I think the word is bashfully – and plays with his mug. I groan internally – this is like pulling teeth – but I just wait him out. “I was on the phone with him because I didn’t want to tell him that over text, you know?”“And mom heard you,” Paige concludes.His eyes flick up to her and then back to his mug. “Yeah, but I think she believes I’m – I don’t know having an affair with another girl or something.” Okay, so this is not unsalvageable. This might actually help with the whole other mess of his parents expecting us to get married.

Except.Asher is still not looking at me, like he’s reluctant to tell me the rest. “Asher,” I say. “What is it?” He looks at me. I try to read his gaze but he seems closed off. And then he looks at his sister, and all I can see is sadness in his eyes.“It made me think and…” he trails off. He takes a big breath, and adds, “I think I’m going to tell them.”Paige inhales sharply and squeezes my hand, but all she does is asks, “When?”

“Whenever they force that conversation, I guess?”

“You can’t do that before everyone else has left.”“Yeah, I’m trying, but you know mom.”I’m only half-listening to their back and forth now. I think I’ve gone a little numb. All that runs through my head is the selfish thought that this is the worst timing for me and Paige. That there’s no way her parents will ever be okay with her moving in with or close to Asher and I. That they’re going to redouble their efforts to make her the perfect daughter they want if Asher cannot be the perfect son they thought he was. I know somewhere at the back of my head that I am jumping the gun. That their parents could surprise us still. Accept Asher and give Paige hope that they’ll accept her. But right now, I can’t think of anything but the looming loss.I look up when I hear my name, and I turn to Paige. She’s looking expectantly at me. She frowns and says, “Let’s go home, okay?”Back at the house, I don’t even pretend to put on a brave face. It works well enough for Asher’s cover anyway. For now. It might not once he clarifies everything, but for now it means people leave me alone. I don’t look at anyone, but I’m sure Elizabeth must show pity all over her face. Paige joins me in her room as I am turning on the hot water in the tub. “You okay?” I sigh. I’m finally starting to digest the news and I’m realizing I should also be concerned about her. She’ll be much more impacted than I will. And yet, she’s been the one facing everyone like everything was fine.“I’m sorry,” I say, turning away from the tub. “I should be the one supporting you right now.” She comes into the bathroom more fully, and I meet her with a step. She takes my hand, but doesn’t say it’s okay. Clearly, it’s not. Clearly, she’s struggling with this, and I have been a terrible friend.

“Why don’t you join me in the bath and we can talk about it?”

“That does sound good,” she says with a tiny smile.“Okay, I’m just gonna lock that door.” I release her hand. “Start stripping.” I go to lock her bedroom door as well, covering all our bases, on my way to grab her fluffy robe and my comfiest sweatpants. When I come back, she’s submerged in steaming sudsy water, head resting on the tub’s edge, eyes closed. The air is thick with smells of lavender and coconut.When the lock clicks shut, she opens her eyes and inclines her head towards me, still resting on the rim. I can see the fatigue in her eyes, but she already seems more relaxed. I deposit my loot on her hamper and quickly peel off my clothes. As I lift my foot to enter the water, she sits up and takes my hand. “Be careful, the tub is slippery with the oils.”