Chapter 64

"Yes," I breathed.

"Then what's to wonder about?" She leaned in to kiss me a little harder this time. "One of the things I believe about Christ's message is that love is never wrong. I don't think it matters whether it's between a man and a woman, two men or two women. The things we do are just acts, but how we treat each other is how God will judge us."

"So we just shared an 'act'?" I asked, my turn to have that teasing tone.

"Several." McKayla winked. Her hand went to the back of my neck. I tilted my head back and opened my mouth. Her tongue intertwined with mine. "And I plan on sharing many more with you later today."

"Mmmmmm," I purred. "That sounds like a plan."

"What do you want to do now?" McKayla asked. "Finish breakfast?"

"Maybe later," I said seductively. "I think you need to pray some more."

"Pray?" she gave me a quizzical look.

"Yes, sweetheart, you're going to pray." Taking her hand, I pulled her toward the bedroom. "Are you ready? Repeat after me ... Oh, god ... OH! God ... Oh, GOD!"

We laughed and fell on to her bed.

That night, I tried to convince McKayla to call in sick with me the next day, but she had some important meetings. I had to be at work early, too, so I headed home late Sunday. I also needed some time to think.

What was I doing? My feelings for McKayla were becoming stronger. There was definitely an attraction between us, and not just because of the sex. I was intrigued by her intelligence. She was interested in the world. We talked about nearly everything. She was funny. She was kind. The only way she could have been more perfect was if she spent her weekends volunteering at a shelter for homeless kids and donated a kidney to a random stranger.

Yet a little part of me wondered if I was willing to completely change my lifestyle. I felt some of that while at church and out in public with her. I felt like people were staring at us. Judging us. Judging me.

I felt so alone that night. Laying in my bed, without her arms around me, I wished she were there to comfort me. I had never felt that way with anyone before. Even with my ex, for the two years we were together, I don't ever remember wanting him touching me as I slept. And there I was, missing the gentle warmth of my female lover.

A part of me wanted to call her, but would that make me come off as being desperate? Or would that scare her off? After all, McKayla was already cautious of relationships; the last thing I wanted to do was smother her.

So I lay there alone, counting sheep and wishing my lover was next to me. When I finally fell asleep, it was only bundled up under my heavy comforter and surrounded by pillows, poor surrogates for my raven-haired beauty with the charming smile and tender touch.