74

When he came home later that day, he stopped at the cottage, his unbuttoned shirt and loose tie giving him an air of magazine model. He had dark grey tailored trousers on over smart expensive black shoes, but he had pulled his shirt loose at the waist messily. Dropping his jacket over the couch.

He casually meandered into the room where she was attempting to put the finishing details to a little forest scene. The illustrations were similar in concept to her last in that it was a woodland set fairytale book but instead of gnomes and cute shaggy wildlife, it was all floral fairies and pixies, insects and small furry rodents. He leant down, kissing the back of her exposed neck, her hair piled messily on top of her head to keep it out of her way, admiring her work. She stopped, arching back and raising her face to meet his for a mouth to mouth kiss, savouring the way he always made her feel so desirable with the briefest of touches.

‘I had a call today! Let’s talk about it through in the other room.’ He looked at her warily, she could already sense the tension in his voice, he pulled her lazily from her chair and led her to the lounge. His calm manner and fluid movements easily guiding her onto the seat with him. Kicking off his shoes as she loosened his smooth tie fully and pulled it from around his neck, discarding it on the nearest table neatly. He sighed pulling her in for a slow long kiss, his hands moving up around her neck and jawline gently before breaking away, holding her captive, his fingers tracing her lips. His head cushioned in the padded couch his eyes fixed on their progress.

‘Your call?’ She breathed softly. Mesmerised by the erotic hypnotics of the movement and trying to push away the niggles, she stilled as he took a deep meaningful breath, letting it out slowly

‘Morag is being released!’ He frowned at her, pausing all movement.

She felt her face drop before she could counteract the reaction but his hand smoothing over her frown told her it was okay. He felt the same way.

‘What now?’ She sounded childlike, his face closed a little, his eyes far away and dark. Tensing his jaw as he thought about it and shrugged, unable to really formulate the right response.

‘I make sure she understands how things are now. What you are to me. That things are different, and I won’t be so readily available to shoulder her woes and meltdowns anymore.’ Rob pulled her closer on top of him, so she laid out, moulding his body and nestling her face against his chest. ‘I told you that it would be different, it will be.’

Rose sat motionless and silent. Numb and unsure how to calm the sea of thoughts washing over her like a tidal wave. Somehow knowing that Morag had been under lock and key, unable to come out. Overseen by professionals and people taking care of her. It had given her peace of mind. Breathing space to carry on unchecked. Affording them to feel like they could carry on unaffected, lost in the fantasy of it. She had known that eventually this would come up and he would have to deal with the fallout at some point, but now it was finally here, and Rose wasn’t ready. He broke the silence and her train of thoughts.

‘Tell me what you want me to do?’ He was looking deep into her eyes. ‘How I should play this?’ He really had no clue anymore. He was looking for insight. Knowing that his way of dealing with it so far had only made things worse.

‘I don’t know Rob. I don’t know her. I don’t know how to deal with her or understand how to even start dealing with her.’ She bit her lip thoughtfully, holding in the urge to cry. ‘You need to speak to her again. Try once more. Maybe now she’s back on her medication it will be easier. Calmer?’ She lifted her chin, so she could appraise his face, her heart thundering through her chest and her skin prickling with anxiety.

‘I need to tell her about this before anyone else does too.’ Rob scooped up her hand, turning her ring in his fingers slowly; his eyes a dark cloudy grey. Pulling her fingers to his mouth to brush against his lips, they both jumped as his phone shrilled out painfully, vibrating beside them on the table.

‘Jesus. Abby!’ He glanced at the screen. ‘Talk about timing!’ Sliding up from him so he could answer the phone Rose moved to the kitchen to fill the kettle and give him a minute. She needed a moment herself to think about things. Her head a whirlwind as she tried to formulate some kind of plan of action. Coming up empty.

She knew he had to be delicate, gentle, and maybe that’s what this needed. Time and careful handling. An understanding that this woman was not some evil monster, but a broken and sad person, with real problems. Real trauma in her past and no one else to turn too. Maybe by ignoring that all this time had somehow made it worse for the other woman. No more pandering, but yet, a little more understanding and empathy involved in explaining that he was with Rose now. Maybe for a while, they could go back to staying out of sight, not rubbing it in the woman’s face. Let her get used to the new order of things for a while before they started venturing out publicly again.

She heard the tone of his voice change and the obvious volume rise brought her attention up. Standing still. A prickle running up her spine as she listened intently. He seemed agitated with his sister, the noise of him getting off the couch and pacing around as he continued to talk.

The kettle clicked, drawing her attention and forcing her to concentrate on making the two steaming mugs of coffee. Trying to find a task and give him space, she rummaged the fridge finding cooked chicken, leftover salad, pasta and coleslaw and began to plate up instead. He rarely got angry with Abby but when he did it was best to give them a wide berth to bang it out between them.

He appeared at the door as she slid everything on the table moments later. That dark look and stormy eyes indicating he was not happy; he threw his phone on the table absently, sending it skimming between the plates and came to rest on the back of one of the chairs. Flexing his upper arms and hunching his strong shoulders moodily

‘That god damn girl!’ He was more than angry. The darkness of his eyes almost sinister.

‘What’s she done?’ She coaxed gently, uptight at his severe mood change, continuing to set the plates, mugs and cutlery out before them. Trying to still her thumping heart, her gut giving her warnings.

‘What have THEY done more like!’ He pulled out the chair, sliding in and resting his elbows on the table, his hands coming to his temples and sighing dramatically.

‘Okay, what have THEY done?’ She asked again, stopping to lean on the chair and look at him fully.

‘They decided we should have an engagement party... a surprise! Family and close friends, right?’ He picked up his phone and began picking at a corner of his case in agitation.

‘Right?’ She wasn’t sure why that was that much of a huge deal apart from the fact she still had not worked out the details of telling her own family, and his had sort of found out thanks to Abby.

‘Wrong! The town bugle got wind somehow. Little old women and their insane need to gossip and pretty soon like wildfire the whole town is chipping in, inviting the entire north of Scotland. Abby realising what a fucking idiotic thing it was decided to fess up.’ He dropped his phone and dragged over his mug of coffee, using it to cradle his hands around something as though envisioning his sister’s neck. ‘It’s turned into this huge elaborate party, much like the one we’re still recovering from. I’m still finding stray party poppers and plastic cups around the manor.’ His voice was still husky, irate and deep.

‘You’re worried Morag will get wind and take this much worse?’ Rose soothed, starting to piece together how awful this would be for her to find out this way.

‘I’m not worried she finds out! I know for a fact she will. I’m the Laird and this is a small country town baby... I’m big news and that makes you and I newsworthy. Every local rag and radio will be practically headlining it. Makes a change from wool prices and oil rig strikes.’

Rose sat down slowly, letting it all sink in.

‘Oh god.’ Was all she could say as she thought about how cruel it would be to hear the man you were crazy for was getting married over a radio show.

‘It’s not that I don’t want her to know. It’s the way she finds out that matters. I owe her at least that much! I’ve been the only constant friend in her life since we were kids and to let her find out via the grapevine or media would be the shittest thing to do to her.’ He was visibly frustrated, tension oozing from every pore. Rose couldn’t agree more.

‘What are you going to do?’

‘I’m going to have to be the one to bring her home from the hospital, before this goes public.’ He was angrily tapping his fingers now on the handle of the cup, trying to form some sort of strategy in his mind. ‘I’ll just have to tell her. Deal with the outburst once I get her home. Hope that it’s not as bad as I suspect it’s going to be.’ He cursed Abby again. ‘My father has been just as bad! He’s been dishing out the cheques and making calls, arranging the whole damn thing. He knows what we’re dealing with; It’s like he’s trying to force my hand where Morag’s concerned.’ He sighed again, letting go of his mug to again cradle his temples.

Rose was speechless, trying to find comforting words and wisdom, watching him wrestle with his own thoughts and anger before her. He picked up his mug and drank a large mouthful. His face calming as he pulled back inwards, the return of blank-faced control that signaled Rob going into all business mode.

Pulling his plate towards him he attempted to eat and pushed it back away moments later, apologising softly. Rose shrugged, smiling understandably. Reaching out to take his hands and watching him carefully; he gripped her fingers gently before getting up and leaving the room.

His manner was making her uneasy, a feeling rising inside her, instinct telling her she would be spending the evening alone. He returned a few minutes later confirming her fears. Shoes back on. Shirt rolled up at the sleeves and tucked in.

‘I’m sorry baby. I need to go stop my dad form making this any worse. Give Abby hell and call the hospital for release details. I need some time to think things through and calm down. I don’t want to inflict this mood on you.’ He scooped his phone from the table.

She nodded numbly, unable to meet his eyes, pushing her food around the plate absently. Apologising again, he came around the table kissing her on top of the head.

‘I’ll stay at the manor tonight and get some work done after I’ve dealt with this shit. I’ll text you.’

Rose made a face of protest, but he seemed to avoid recognition. Turning to pick up Muffin and lavish quick affection on him before sending him on his way again. She wanted to cry.

Rob was doing what he did best; closing ranks, shutting her out and taking control of something messy. Abby had told her a million times that it’s how he had dealt with their mother’s death, how he dealt with anything that he felt responsible for and now here she was at the receiving end and she wanted to shake him.

She heard the door of the cottage close softly, moments later, and her heart deflated hugely. Trying not to be angry at him but unable to push the heartache and disappointment away. She knew that she had nothing to feel insecure about, he had proven that to her a hundred times over already but closing her out over this stupid woman was not exactly helping her mental state right now.

The way he was being over the other woman finding out, although frustrating was also something she understood. It’s who he was. Carer. Protector. Shoulder to lean on. He wasn’t an asshole who just hurt those he cared about. He was someone who stood up and took control when everything was falling apart, someone who tried to smooth it over and hold it all together. The way he had done when his mother had passed; everyone looked up to him, relied on him. People in town came to him for advice and help endlessly and greeted him like a celebrity or a film star. It was because he was a good person, always finding the time to really listen to them and help in any way he could. He had an aura of control and wisdom that he could make everything better. Honest and never motivated by anything other than genuine care.

He had been in that woman’s life for half of his own; once teen lovers. He had stood by her when her world had crumbled, loved her once, as much as that pained Rose to admit. Her own mother passing away early on, leaving her alone and defenseless and he had held her hand in the agonising court case against her abusive father, been the only constant when she had broken down; destroyed by the events of her own life. He hadn’t turned his back on her after her lies and attempted suicide. He had pushed his own anger and hurt aside and been that strength for her once again. Patient and steady no matter how much she had acted out and fallen apart.

She knew this wasn’t easy for him; he would be intentionally looking her in the face and destroying what was left of her heart with what he had to say. Someone who he had sheltered and protected endlessly, and it went against every one of his instincts to be the reason she may never recover. She understood his need for some head space. It was an almighty labyrinth of complication, overwhelming him but it didn’t make Rose feel any better, despite knowing all of that.

Rob didn’t call or text that evening, and he didn’t crawl into her bed in the night as Rose had hoped. Sleeping with the door unlocked in the off chance he would appear. She had left him alone, unsure how to navigate this, even though she felt like she knew him in ways no one else did, the reality was that they still had so much to learn about each other. Parts of their personalities and lives, they had only grazed the surface of. She had never seen him this way except when she had exited his life, didn’t know how to comfort him or make him talk about what he was thinking. He was so used to dealing with things alone. The eternal strong rock everyone turned to and letting her help him was not something he was used too.

The reality that they had only known one another a few short months and this whirlwind that had taken over her life, was less time than most people spent on first dates and casual fooling around, still trying to figure out if they even liked who they were seeing. Somehow, they had bypassed all of it, going straight in for the kill; both knowing from the first moments that this was different.

She wouldn’t change it though. She wouldn’t have him any other way, didn’t need to take things slow and waste time playing games and acting cool. It seemed he had been on the same page and when you found something that earth shattering it only made sense to dive right in.