Chapter 256 Shit Escape is Impossible
·
Jing Shen Tian Si
"What? Drilling into the toilet." Aaron stared at Bud with wide eyes. "I don't agree with killing him. I have never been so wronged when I grow up."
Shit escape, thank you for thinking it out.
Although he is not from this world, if he does this kind of thing, it will be a nightmare to go to the bathroom in the future.
The dwarves also glared at each other, with 1 reluctances in their hearts. If word spreads that the reputation of the whole life will be ruined, how will they get along in the future?
"That's the safest route, no one would think of it." Bud smiled far-fetchedly, "And don't get me wrong, the toilet in our house leads directly to the lake below, and it's not dirty at all."
"That's not okay." Aaron said angrily.
"Okay!" Bud spread his hands helplessly, "You can go to my house openly, and then be discovered by the watchers, and then be discovered by the mayor.
It doesn't matter to me, at worst, you will be beaten up, and at worst, you will be locked up for a period of time, but you will definitely be arrested and sent to the woodland kingdom to claim credit. "
Hearing this, Sorin was silent for a long time and then said: "We agreed."
"Sorin." Dwalin was very puzzled and looked at him in disbelief, "You, you can't..."
"Why not?" Sorin asked rhetorically, "Is it the journey that matters, or the little bit of self-respect?
We're running out of time, nothing can go wrong, miss this one, and we might not have a chance. "
When the dwarves heard this, they could only accept this route against their will. After all, there was no comparison between personal honor and disgrace and rebuilding the dwarf kingdom.
"I want to go to you, I will definitely, absolutely, never go that way." Aaron said rather disgusted, "Even if I die, die outside, jump from here, I will not learn shit escape. "
"Aaron, just bear with it." Bilbo persuaded patiently.
"You don't need to persuade me. The elf prince and I have a little friendship. Even if I get caught, nothing will happen."
"But this is not your business alone!" Balin said in a deep voice, "We are a team. If you are exposed, we will naturally not be able to hide."
"Gaius." Sorin looked at him deeply, "Don't forget the contract you signed, you can't be arrogant at this time."
"You..." Aaron laughed angrily, "Okay! Now that things have happened, I won't pretend anymore.
That's right, I'm a wizard, and magic can keep me out of the sight of ordinary people, so I won't hold back the team. "
"But you don't even have your wand," said Bilbo weakly.
Aaron gave him a hard look, why didn't you find out that your mouth is so broken before?
"Are you sure?" Thorin asked seriously.
"I'm pretty sure."
"Can that help us too..." Dwalin asked impatiently, there seemed to be a gleam of light in his eyes.
Hearing this, Aaron gave him a gentle smile, "I'm sorry, I might disappoint you, but I'm not that good yet."
I'm that powerful, it's not impossible to cast the Disillusionment Curse on a dozen people, but who told you to force me to escape?
It's not very harmful, it's very insulting.
A look of embarrassment appeared on the faces of Dwalin and the others, and they stopped being reluctant.
"Have you discussed it?" Bud asked, "Come with me after we have discussed it."
He led the crowd along a narrow path, but just after turning a corner, he bumped into a young man.
"Dad, our house is under surveillance."
"Your son?" Aaron looked at the boy, and by visual estimation he should be a few years older than him.
Bard nodded, then looked at his son, "Don't worry, Barn.
You stay here with Gaius, I'll show the others the route, and I'll be back soon. "
After speaking, Bud led the others to continue walking around the streets, told them the location of his home, and focused on describing the signs of the toilet, lest they get into the wrong place.
After turning back, he saw Aaron grabbing his son and asking him about his age, education, and living conditions.
"Ahem! It's time for us to go. How are you going to get to my house?" Bud asked, "If you regret it now, I can take you there again."
"No need." Aaron snapped his fingers, and his body instantly became transparent.
Bud was a little better. Although he was shocked, his expression was calm.
Bahn was dumbfounded, pointing at the transparent area in front of him tremblingly, "Dad, Dad, Dad, did you see it?
He is invisible?Really invisible. "
"I see, I'm not blind."
"A simple and unpretentious disillusionment spell." Aaron said lightly, "Now you can lead the way with confidence."
Bud and Bahn looked at each other and walked out of the alley silently.
In order to prevent those who watched them from finding out that the time was wrong, they went to the market and bought some useful things as a cover.
As they approached the house, the three climbed up the stairs.
Bud threw a fruit to the two people who were fishing under his house, "You can tell the mayor that I have finished my work today."
A little girl saw Bud come in and hugged him happily, "Dad, where have you been?"
Another older girl also gave him a hug, "Father, you're back, I'm so worried."
"Here, Sigrid." Bard smiled, and handed her the things he scavenged from the market.
"Family harmony!" Aaron said with emotion.
"Who is talking?" The eldest daughter Sigrid looked around in surprise.
"Yes, it's a wizard, to a wizard." Bain said firmly, then looked to the side, "Gaius, show them."
Aaron shrugged, and then lifted the Disillusionment Charm.
Seeing Aaron, the eldest daughter, Sigrid, couldn't help but widen her eyes. It was the first time she had seen such a handsome guy when she grew up.
"What a wizard." The youngest daughter looked at Aaron curiously, "Can you teach me magic?"
"Uh...it depends on talent. There are some things you can't just learn if you want to." Aaron said euphemistically, wizards are quite rare in this world, and this family has no wizard blood at all.
"Barne, let them in."
"I'll go too." Aaron was full of interest, "Where is your toilet?"
"Come with me!" Barn shrugged and led Aaron down the stairs.
He looked at the unobstructed lake in front of him, and after confirming that no one was watching, he patted the wooden board on the wall.
boom! boom! boom!
A bald man came out of the toilet, and Dwalin looked at Bahn very seriously, and warned: "If you tell anyone about this, I will wring your hand off."
Aaron couldn't help laughing as he looked at Dwalin's face darkened.
"You still dare to laugh?" Dwalin's face darkened even more. "And you, if you dare to speak out, I will definitely pull out your tongue."
"Hahaha..." Aaron clutched his stomach, "I'm very sorry, I've also been trained strictly, no matter how funny it is, I won't laugh unless I can't help it.
In addition, I appreciate your attitude, but unfortunately, you can't beat me, hahahaha..."
Dwalin's angry eyes were burning, and he gave Aaron a hard look, then lifted the toilet lid and crawled out of the lake.
Bahn wanted to give him a hand, but he slapped his left hand away, "Don't touch me."
"Go up that way." Barn pointed to the stairs, and then pulled Bilbo out of the toilet, followed by a third, a fourth...
Every time a person came out, Aaron's undisguised laughter stabbed him in the heart. When the last person came out, Aaron suppressed his laughter forcefully.
It's not easy for Qili to survive until now, if he is overwhelmed by this wave of ridicule, the poison may spread even faster.
"Dad, why are these dwarves crawling out of our toilet?" Sigrid asked.
"This knife repair is really wonderful." Aaron thought to himself, he obviously felt Qili staggered just now, and he undoubtedly suffered a critical blow in his heart.
"Will they bring us good luck?" the little girl asked happily.
"Not necessarily." Aaron patted her on the head and put a gold coin into her pocket, "But I will bring you good luck.
Take it, the pocket money my brother gave you. "
When all the people came out, they gathered around the fire.
Now that winter is about to enter, they soaked in the cold lake water for nearly half an hour, each shivering from the cold.
Bud shared the blankets at home with his clothes, and the three brothers and sisters specially poured a cup of hot water for each of them to warm up.
Sigrid handed the water glass to Aaron, "Do you need it?"
"Thanks, but the water is unnecessary, just give me the glass." Aaron took out the bottle of wine directly, "I have this."
Aaron opened the wine bottle and just poured a full glass, and the mellow smell immediately permeated the room.
"Wine." Ouyin murmured, and the others also looked at the wine bottle, and the voices of swallowing saliva kept coming and going.
"Hey, hey, can you have some quality?" Aaron glanced at everyone in disgust, and took a big sip from the wine glass, "It tastes good, better than the wine brewed by Bilbo."
"Why does this look like a key?" Bain asked puzzledly, looking at the cork.
"Ahem!" Aaron almost spit out his half-drunk wine, "Don't worry about those details, I'll give it to you if you want it, and throw it away if you don't want it."
Bahn was stunned for a moment, picked up the cork and threw it into the stove, adding a touch of warmth to the home.
"Dwarf's wind crossbow." Thorin stared at a dilapidated tower outside the window, on which was a large crossbow.
"You look like you've seen a ghost," said Bilbo.
"Indeed," Balin explained, "the last time we saw this crossbow, the town was on fire.
On the day the dragon came, the day Smaug destroyed Laketown, Girion, Mayor of Laketown, summoned all his archers to attack the dragon.
But the dragon's scale armor is very hard, harder than the strongest battle armor, only the black arrows fired from the wind crossbow can penetrate the dragon armor, but such arrows are very rare.
Few of these arrows remained when Giraion struck the final blow. "
"If Giraion had shot the dragon that day, everything would have been different," Thorin said regretfully.
"Say it as if you were there at the time." Bud walked over and said.
"Perhaps he was really there." Aaron shrugged. "After all, he is a dwarf, and they are all dwarves."
"Then they should know that Giraion shot the dragon. He left a scar on the dragon's left flank. One more blow would have killed the dragon."
puff!
Aaron spit out a mouthful of amber liquid, looked at Bahn in astonishment, "Are you serious?"
"It's true."
"Where is it exactly? Is it near the heart?" Aaron asked eagerly. If there is no accident, they will be slaying the dragon next, and all the weaknesses of the dragon need to be clarified.
Shit escape, thank you for thinking it out.
Although he is not from this world, if he does this kind of thing, it will be a nightmare to go to the bathroom in the future.
The dwarves also glared at each other, with 1 reluctances in their hearts. If word spreads that the reputation of the whole life will be ruined, how will they get along in the future?
"That's the safest route, no one would think of it." Bud smiled far-fetchedly, "And don't get me wrong, the toilet in our house leads directly to the lake below, and it's not dirty at all."
"That's not okay." Aaron said angrily.
"Okay!" Bud spread his hands helplessly, "You can go to my house openly, and then be discovered by the watchers, and then be discovered by the mayor.
It doesn't matter to me, at worst, you will be beaten up, and at worst, you will be locked up for a period of time, but you will definitely be arrested and sent to the woodland kingdom to claim credit. "
Hearing this, Sorin was silent for a long time and then said: "We agreed."
"Sorin." Dwalin was very puzzled and looked at him in disbelief, "You, you can't..."
"Why not?" Sorin asked rhetorically, "Is it the journey that matters, or the little bit of self-respect?
We're running out of time, nothing can go wrong, miss this one, and we might not have a chance. "
When the dwarves heard this, they could only accept this route against their will. After all, there was no comparison between personal honor and disgrace and rebuilding the dwarf kingdom.
"I want to go to you, I will definitely, absolutely, never go that way." Aaron said rather disgusted, "Even if I die, die outside, jump from here, I will not learn shit escape. "
"Aaron, just bear with it." Bilbo persuaded patiently.
"You don't need to persuade me. The elf prince and I have a little friendship. Even if I get caught, nothing will happen."
"But this is not your business alone!" Balin said in a deep voice, "We are a team. If you are exposed, we will naturally not be able to hide."
"Gaius." Sorin looked at him deeply, "Don't forget the contract you signed, you can't be arrogant at this time."
"You..." Aaron laughed angrily, "Okay! Now that things have happened, I won't pretend anymore.
That's right, I'm a wizard, and magic can keep me out of the sight of ordinary people, so I won't hold back the team. "
"But you don't even have your wand," said Bilbo weakly.
Aaron gave him a hard look, why didn't you find out that your mouth is so broken before?
"Are you sure?" Thorin asked seriously.
"I'm pretty sure."
"Can that help us too..." Dwalin asked impatiently, there seemed to be a gleam of light in his eyes.
Hearing this, Aaron gave him a gentle smile, "I'm sorry, I might disappoint you, but I'm not that good yet."
I'm that powerful, it's not impossible to cast the Disillusionment Curse on a dozen people, but who told you to force me to escape?
It's not very harmful, it's very insulting.
A look of embarrassment appeared on the faces of Dwalin and the others, and they stopped being reluctant.
"Have you discussed it?" Bud asked, "Come with me after we have discussed it."
He led the crowd along a narrow path, but just after turning a corner, he bumped into a young man.
"Dad, our house is under surveillance."
"Your son?" Aaron looked at the boy, and by visual estimation he should be a few years older than him.
Bard nodded, then looked at his son, "Don't worry, Barn.
You stay here with Gaius, I'll show the others the route, and I'll be back soon. "
After speaking, Bud led the others to continue walking around the streets, told them the location of his home, and focused on describing the signs of the toilet, lest they get into the wrong place.
After turning back, he saw Aaron grabbing his son and asking him about his age, education, and living conditions.
"Ahem! It's time for us to go. How are you going to get to my house?" Bud asked, "If you regret it now, I can take you there again."
"No need." Aaron snapped his fingers, and his body instantly became transparent.
Bud was a little better. Although he was shocked, his expression was calm.
Bahn was dumbfounded, pointing at the transparent area in front of him tremblingly, "Dad, Dad, Dad, did you see it?
He is invisible?Really invisible. "
"I see, I'm not blind."
"A simple and unpretentious disillusionment spell." Aaron said lightly, "Now you can lead the way with confidence."
Bud and Bahn looked at each other and walked out of the alley silently.
In order to prevent those who watched them from finding out that the time was wrong, they went to the market and bought some useful things as a cover.
As they approached the house, the three climbed up the stairs.
Bud threw a fruit to the two people who were fishing under his house, "You can tell the mayor that I have finished my work today."
A little girl saw Bud come in and hugged him happily, "Dad, where have you been?"
Another older girl also gave him a hug, "Father, you're back, I'm so worried."
"Here, Sigrid." Bard smiled, and handed her the things he scavenged from the market.
"Family harmony!" Aaron said with emotion.
"Who is talking?" The eldest daughter Sigrid looked around in surprise.
"Yes, it's a wizard, to a wizard." Bain said firmly, then looked to the side, "Gaius, show them."
Aaron shrugged, and then lifted the Disillusionment Charm.
Seeing Aaron, the eldest daughter, Sigrid, couldn't help but widen her eyes. It was the first time she had seen such a handsome guy when she grew up.
"What a wizard." The youngest daughter looked at Aaron curiously, "Can you teach me magic?"
"Uh...it depends on talent. There are some things you can't just learn if you want to." Aaron said euphemistically, wizards are quite rare in this world, and this family has no wizard blood at all.
"Barne, let them in."
"I'll go too." Aaron was full of interest, "Where is your toilet?"
"Come with me!" Barn shrugged and led Aaron down the stairs.
He looked at the unobstructed lake in front of him, and after confirming that no one was watching, he patted the wooden board on the wall.
boom! boom! boom!
A bald man came out of the toilet, and Dwalin looked at Bahn very seriously, and warned: "If you tell anyone about this, I will wring your hand off."
Aaron couldn't help laughing as he looked at Dwalin's face darkened.
"You still dare to laugh?" Dwalin's face darkened even more. "And you, if you dare to speak out, I will definitely pull out your tongue."
"Hahaha..." Aaron clutched his stomach, "I'm very sorry, I've also been trained strictly, no matter how funny it is, I won't laugh unless I can't help it.
In addition, I appreciate your attitude, but unfortunately, you can't beat me, hahahaha..."
Dwalin's angry eyes were burning, and he gave Aaron a hard look, then lifted the toilet lid and crawled out of the lake.
Bahn wanted to give him a hand, but he slapped his left hand away, "Don't touch me."
"Go up that way." Barn pointed to the stairs, and then pulled Bilbo out of the toilet, followed by a third, a fourth...
Every time a person came out, Aaron's undisguised laughter stabbed him in the heart. When the last person came out, Aaron suppressed his laughter forcefully.
It's not easy for Qili to survive until now, if he is overwhelmed by this wave of ridicule, the poison may spread even faster.
"Dad, why are these dwarves crawling out of our toilet?" Sigrid asked.
"This knife repair is really wonderful." Aaron thought to himself, he obviously felt Qili staggered just now, and he undoubtedly suffered a critical blow in his heart.
"Will they bring us good luck?" the little girl asked happily.
"Not necessarily." Aaron patted her on the head and put a gold coin into her pocket, "But I will bring you good luck.
Take it, the pocket money my brother gave you. "
When all the people came out, they gathered around the fire.
Now that winter is about to enter, they soaked in the cold lake water for nearly half an hour, each shivering from the cold.
Bud shared the blankets at home with his clothes, and the three brothers and sisters specially poured a cup of hot water for each of them to warm up.
Sigrid handed the water glass to Aaron, "Do you need it?"
"Thanks, but the water is unnecessary, just give me the glass." Aaron took out the bottle of wine directly, "I have this."
Aaron opened the wine bottle and just poured a full glass, and the mellow smell immediately permeated the room.
"Wine." Ouyin murmured, and the others also looked at the wine bottle, and the voices of swallowing saliva kept coming and going.
"Hey, hey, can you have some quality?" Aaron glanced at everyone in disgust, and took a big sip from the wine glass, "It tastes good, better than the wine brewed by Bilbo."
"Why does this look like a key?" Bain asked puzzledly, looking at the cork.
"Ahem!" Aaron almost spit out his half-drunk wine, "Don't worry about those details, I'll give it to you if you want it, and throw it away if you don't want it."
Bahn was stunned for a moment, picked up the cork and threw it into the stove, adding a touch of warmth to the home.
"Dwarf's wind crossbow." Thorin stared at a dilapidated tower outside the window, on which was a large crossbow.
"You look like you've seen a ghost," said Bilbo.
"Indeed," Balin explained, "the last time we saw this crossbow, the town was on fire.
On the day the dragon came, the day Smaug destroyed Laketown, Girion, Mayor of Laketown, summoned all his archers to attack the dragon.
But the dragon's scale armor is very hard, harder than the strongest battle armor, only the black arrows fired from the wind crossbow can penetrate the dragon armor, but such arrows are very rare.
Few of these arrows remained when Giraion struck the final blow. "
"If Giraion had shot the dragon that day, everything would have been different," Thorin said regretfully.
"Say it as if you were there at the time." Bud walked over and said.
"Perhaps he was really there." Aaron shrugged. "After all, he is a dwarf, and they are all dwarves."
"Then they should know that Giraion shot the dragon. He left a scar on the dragon's left flank. One more blow would have killed the dragon."
puff!
Aaron spit out a mouthful of amber liquid, looked at Bahn in astonishment, "Are you serious?"
"It's true."
"Where is it exactly? Is it near the heart?" Aaron asked eagerly. If there is no accident, they will be slaying the dragon next, and all the weaknesses of the dragon need to be clarified.
