Chapter 410: Disqualified from the Human World

AI generates beautiful pictures of Guan Tingmei

Guan Tingmei, as the president and editor-in-chief of the Persimmon Publishing House, replied with a gentle smile in order to appear more prestigious: "Then I will test your literature. Can you improvise a modern poem?"

Lin Lang replied in a catchphrase: "Drinking and composing poetry is a small matter that not only Li Bai is good at, but I also know a little bit about it!"

Guan Tingmei smiled charmingly, looking at the handsome Lin Lang with a dazed look, and joked: "Then Mr. Lin, don't control yourself, just improvise a limerick now!"

Lin Lang picked up the glass and took a sip of white wine. Then, following the system prompt, he began to improvise a modern poem, borrowing from a love poem published by contemporary poet Yu Xiuhua in 2014.

"Cough cough..."

"The poem I'm going to improvise is called 'Crossing Most of the Summer Country to Sleep with You'."

Guan Tingmei covered her mouth and laughed: "Xiao Lang, are you kidding me?"

"Of course I'm not kidding, I'm writing poetry seriously!"

"But Xiaolang, you are not joking, then why are the names of your poems so inappropriate?"

"Aiya~ Aunt Mei, do you want to listen to my poetry? You are interrupting my creative inspiration!"

"Good good!"

"Isn't it okay if Aunt Mei doesn't interrupt your impromptu poetry composition?"

"I'd like to listen carefully to your impromptu composition 'I Crossed Half of the Summer Country to Sleep with You'. Is it poetic or a funny doggerel?" Guan Tingmei's charming and sweet smile was so attractive.

Lin Lang raised his glass again and took a sip of white wine, then began to pretend to recite a poem.

I traveled across most of the country to sleep with you

In fact, sleeping with you and being slept with by you are almost the same

It is nothing but the force of two bodies colliding, nothing but the flower that blooms due to this force.

It is nothing more than the virtual spring created by these flowers, which makes us mistakenly believe that life has been reopened.

In most of Xia country, everything is happening: volcanoes are erupting, rivers are drying up,

Some criminals and refugees who were not taken care of

Elk and red-crowned cranes at gunpoint

I went through the hail of bullets to sleep with you

I am pressing countless nights into one dawn to sleep with you

I am countless me running into one me to sleep with you

Of course I get led astray by some butterflies

Take some praise as spring

Treat a village similar to Hengdian as your hometown

and they

These are all the necessary reasons for me to sleep with you.

When Guan Tingmei first heard Lin Lang's poem, she wanted to laugh, because the poem "I Crossed Half of Xia Country to Sleep with You" sounded a bit inappropriate at first.

But after savoring it carefully, Guan Tingmei realized that this poem, with "sleeping with you" as its core image, unfolds a profound reflection on life, love and the state of existence.

Guan Tingmei heard the cry of freedom in the bold and vulgar poems. Lin Lang's impromptu song "Crossing Half of the Summer Country to Sleep with You" was like a burning torch to her, illuminating Guan Tingmei's humanity.

After Lin Lang recited a poem, the smile on Guan Tingmei's face gradually turned into surprise. She clapped her hands and exclaimed, "Great!"

"Xiao Lang, your unorthodox modern poem may have a shocking title, which may easily lead people to mistakenly think that the content is too vulgar. However, after listening to the content of the poem, I find it to be very literary, even full of power and depth!"

"This poem uses 'sleeping with you' as its core image, revealing the power of life, social prejudice and personal struggle. It is indeed a masterpiece worth pondering and savoring over and over again!"

Guan Tingmei's expression was very excited and exaggerated when she praised Lin Lang. She even looked at him with the passionate gaze of a fangirl, with great admiration.

Lin Lang shook his hair exaggeratedly, "Aunt Mei, did the test questions you gave me stump me?"

"Well...you really understand literature."

"Xiao Lang, this poem you improvised is simply a river of desire and sensuality. It really aroused me."

"Aunt Mei believes that if you publish the modern poem "I'll Cross Half of Xia Country to Sleep with You" on the Internet, it will definitely go viral."

After listening to this, Lin Lang thought, "This modern poem written by Yu Xiuhua, a female poet with cerebral palsy, was originally a work that went viral on the Internet in 2015. It was forwarded nearly 100 million times that year, and it can be regarded as a phenomenally popular masterpiece."

After reading it, Lin Lang looked at Guan Tingmei with lustful eyes, and said with a chuckle: "Aunt Mei, now I am going to redeem the reward and start kissing you, are you ready?"

Guan Tingmei, whose face was flushed, became inexplicably nervous after hearing this. She picked up the wine glass and tactically took a sip of the white wine, and said weakly: "Xiao Lang, stop making trouble. You don't really want to kiss me, do you?"

"I'm not making a fuss!"

"Aunt Mei, we made a bet. You promised me that if the test questions were not difficult for me, you would reward me with a kiss!"

Guan Tingmei opened her red lips slightly, looked at Lin Lang with a drunken look in her eyes, and replied with a quickened heartbeat: "But I..."

Without waiting for Guan Tingmei to finish her words, Lin Lang couldn't wait to kiss her red lips. It was a very bold and passionate kiss.

Lin Lang's kiss made Guan Tingmei have difficulty breathing. He kissed her so greedily that he didn't give Guan Tingmei any time to react, let alone leave her a chance to refuse.

Guan Tingmei's brain suddenly crashed when Lin Lang forcefully kissed her. She continued to kiss Lin Lang with a blank mind.

After a brief hesitation, Guan Tingmei, blushing and heartbeating, pushed Lin Lang away and said embarrassedly: "Xiao Lang, you are drunk. I am your mother's best friend. It's not right for us to do this, right?"

Lin Lang, however, laughed with a lingering feeling, "If you lose the bet, you have to admit it. Aunt Mei, you promised me that if you can't stump me with the test questions, I can kiss you!"

Guan Tingmei bit her red lips, looked at Lin Lang with a charming look on her face, and replied with a pounding heart: "But I thought you were going to kiss my face like when we were little!"

"Who would have thought that you were kissing Aunt Mei on the mouth? How can a younger person kiss an elder?"

Lin Lang replied with a playful smile: "My mother has passed away. From now on, we will talk about our own things. You call my mother your sister, and I will call you sister too. How about that?"

"fart!"

"Nonsense, wouldn't that mess up the generations?"

"If you call me Aunt Mei at the beginning, you must keep calling me Aunt Mei from now on. If you keep saying nonsense, I will spank you~"

Lin Lang touched Guan Tingmei's hand and replied, "Beating is love and scolding is care. Aunt Mei, as long as you obey my wishes, you can beat me or scold me as you like in the future."

"Hey……"

"Xiao Lang, what are you doing with your dirty hands?"

Guan Tingmei pushed Lin Lang's hand away, playing hard to get, and replied happily: "What kind of lewd words are you saying, kid? Don't you know who you are flirting with?"

Lin Lang looked at the charming Guan Tingmei, who had a curvy figure and charming demeanor, and replied with difficulty: "Aunt Mei, I didn't kiss you enough just now. What should I do if I want to kiss you again now?"

Guan Tingmei replied with a flushed face: "If you want to continue kissing me, it's easy. Don't you know a thing or two about everything? I'll continue to ask you questions. Do you dare to take them?"

After hearing this, Lin Lang was as excited as if he had been injected with chicken blood. He replied excitedly, "I dare! Of course I dare. Aunt Mei, what do you want to test me next?"

Guan Tingmei drank the white wine in the glass, and with the help of the alcohol, she looked at the ridiculously handsome Lin Lang with blurry eyes, and replied charmingly and tenderly: "You are the boss of a music company, and your literary ability of improvisation is so amazing. There is a piano in my study. You can improvise a song and sing it to me by yourself."

"If the song you improvised sounds good when you sing it yourself, how about Aunt Mei continue to let you kiss her?"

"If you have the ability, can you continue to kiss me, your aunt Mei?" Guan Tingmei used a provocative look to seduce the son of her deceased best friend.

"Snap..." Lin Lang snapped his fingers proudly.

"Aunt Mei, you really can't faze me!"

"I know a little bit about improvising lyrics and music, and I know a little bit about playing the piano and singing by myself! I know a little bit!"

AI generates beautiful pictures of Guan Tingmei

Afterwards, Lin Lang drank the white wine in the glass in one gulp. After standing up, a little drunk, he took Guan Tingmei's hand and walked towards the bedroom.

"Uh... we're alone, Xiaolang, why are you dragging me to the bedroom?"

"I'm sorry, Aunt Mei, the liquor in your house is a bit strong. I wanted to take you to the study but I took the wrong road, hehe..."

In fact, Lin Lang did it on purpose. This ambiguous test made Guan Tingmei further break down her defenses, and she even looked forward to the scene of bringing Lin Lang back to her bedroom.

"Xiaolang, you are so annoying!"

Guan Tingmei helped the slightly tipsy Lin Lang to the study room and lifted the piano lid with great anticipation.

Lin Lang sat upright on the piano stool, raised his hands and placed them on the keys. A clear and pleasant note rang out, and he simply played a short piece of classical piano music to test the sound.

As Lin Lang's fingers pressed the black and white keys, a beautiful melody flowed out from the piano, just like the first ray of sunshine in the morning shining on the earth, making people feel extremely warm and comfortable.

Guan Tingmei, who was standing nearby, couldn't help but exclaimed: "Sure, Xiaolang!"

"You can actually play the piano. I remember that when you were a kid, you only learned to play the erhu from your grandfather, but never the piano!"

Lin Lang replied perfunctorily: "The music theory knowledge of musical instruments is similar, except that the piano and violin use five-line notation, while the erhu and guzheng use simplified notation. The musical instruments just use different notation methods. Basically, if you learn one, you can learn everything!"

After hearing this, Guan Tingmei said, "But the erhu is a bowed string instrument, while the piano is a keyboard percussion string instrument. Even if the music theory knowledge is similar, it doesn't mean that you can play the piano just by playing the erhu, right?"

Lin Lang lied, "I signed up for the piano club when I was in college, and I learned to play the piano in the piano club."

"I see, Xiaolang, you are really knowledgeable and talented!"

Lin Lang chuckled and said, "Aunt Mei, I'm going to start showing off!"

"Then Xiaolang, start showing off!" Guan Tingmei covered her mouth and smiled charmingly.

"wrong!"

"It's a slip of the tongue, it's a slip of the tongue. I'm going to start improvising a song and sing it to Aunt Mei. The name of the song is "Itch". I hope Aunt Mei will like it."

Guan Tingmei couldn't help but laugh and teased, "Xiao Lang, why do the names of your improvisations sound so inappropriate? Did you get the inspiration for this song because you were bitten by a mosquito and the more you scratched, the more it itched?"

Lin Lang smiled without saying anything, and directly played the prelude of the song "Itchy" on the piano. Under the influence of alcohol, he imitated the charming but not coquettish singing voice of the original singer Huang Ling, and sang the magical song "Itchy" that shocked Guan Tingmei.

It is no exaggeration to say that as soon as Lin Lang opened his mouth, the urticaria that Guan Tingmei had been curing for many years was revived. What a sin!

She is a setting sun

I want to know who can appreciate it.

He has a blue window

Just waiting for someone to share it with

She is a continuous piece of music

I wish someone knew how to sing

He has a full eye of soft light

Just waiting for someone to bloom for it

Come on, be happy, have a lot of time anyway

Come on, love, there is a lot of foolishness anyway

Come, wander, and have a lot of directions anyway

Come on, pretend, anyway, there is a lot of scenery

Ah, itchy...

After Lin Lang finished singing, Guan Tingmei clapped her hands like a fangirl and couldn't help but smiled and praised: "Xiao Lang, you are so talented!"

“A person with a normal brain circuit would never write a song like this, but the more I listen to it, the more addicted I become, and the more exciting it becomes!”

"Xiao Lang, you are the only one who can sing a song so seductively!"

"If you were Daji and could sing this song, King Zhou would have been killed by you in the first episode!" Guan Tingmei smiled charmingly.

"Aunt Mei, are you praising me? Or are you insulting me?"

"Of course Aunt Mei is praising you!"

"Xiao Lang, the song 'Itchy' that you improvised is really itchy and arousing. It gave me goose bumps all over my body, and I couldn't suppress the urge to indulge myself!"

Lin Lang stood up from the piano stool, pulled Guan Tingmei into his arms, hugged her slender and soft waist tightly, breathed in the charming perfume on her body, and said uncontrollably: "Aunt Mei, you can't help but want to indulge yourself!"

"Uh...Xiao Lang, what are you going to do to Aunt Mei?"

Guan Tingmei, who was held in Lin Lang's arms, looked at Lin Lang with a blushing face and a beating heart. Her delicate body and red lips were trembling nervously.