Chapter 5

_______________________

Almost 18 years old:

I paced inside my room, my heart thudding as Sally's earlier announcement rang in my ears. It explained why Severus hadn't come to visit me in the past month and why Donna had been very busy lately.

"Your birthday is approaching, Donna. In regards to this monumental moment the boss has given you the chance to wish for whatever you want from him."

Before I could've opened my mouth and uttered the words that I wanted to blindly throw at her, Sally cut me off. In the most stern way she ever had, since I got here.

"After the wedding of course, for now, you can only think about what you want."

All thoughts of demanding for freedom vanished from my mind, I should've seen it coming. That man was hellbent on keeping me here, even if it meant having to tie me up in a room. That fact Sally had clarified for me.

I was frustrated, anyone who saw me could've guessed that. I couldn't talk to Sally because she could relay everything to him and Severus and Donna were both busy while Edward was just out of question. So I was left alone to my thoughts.

Thoughts that border-lined on friendship and wedding. I was close with Severus, we both knew that but I had never been intimate with him and the thought of kissing him made my heart thump away in my chest.

How was a wedding supposed to be? I knew about the dress being white and bouquet of flowers but my knowledge didn't go much farther than that. I knew how to be a spectator not how to be the bride.

Whining to myself, I stood up from my bed and speed walked to the door. I knocked on it from inside knowing that a nearby guard would hear and come have a word with me. I was proven correct as only moments later, someone knocked on the door from the outside.

"Is something the matter, Donna?"

A gruff voice questioned. No male was allowed in my room, at least not without the boss's permission, but unknown to the boss both his sons had broken his rules.

"I want to have a word with Severus."

Everything went still for a while as I strained my ears to pick up any sounds being made outside, unfortunately, I was greeted by silence.

I knocked again, not sure if the guard was still outside. Whispering greeted my ears and a few minutes later, Sally knocked on my door before stepping in.

"You called, Donna?"

I shook my head and took in her expression that clearly said 'I have better things to do and places to be'.

"I want to talk to Severus."

She frowned and folded her arms in front of her chest. From the time that I had known her, I had picked up on small details, for example: If she folded her arms in front of her chest, it meant that she was stuck between supporting me or reprimanding me. Though I can assure anyone that the latter option was her favorite.

"No."

She replied, her lips thinned into a grim line as I frowned.

"Why can't I talk to my Fiance?"

Sally gave me a once over and stiffened as she met my eyes. For a moment, I caught onto the flicker of curiosity that flashed through her eyes but it was quick to disappear.

"Why would you want to talk to him a few weeks before the wedding, Donna?"

"...I want to see him."

Suddenly feeling shy, I lowered my eyes to the ground and peeked up at her through my lashes. She stood there, glued to her spot for a moment before sighing.

"He's currently busy with the wedding so close."

I frowned and pursed my lips, I really wanted to have a word with him but at the same time I guess it was for the best that I didn't get to see him nor did I get to ask him the embarrassing question that clogged my mind.

Sally silently turned around and yanked open the door.

"I'll send for him."

I looked at her back in shock as the door closed behind her. But I was quickly snapped out of the daze as I realized what I'd have to ask of Severus. My cheeks caught fire at the very thought of it.

_________________

"You called?"

I jumped off the couch, the book flying out of my hands as my heart rate quickened. Quickly turning around, I was met with the amused eyes of my soon to be husband.

"You could've walked through the door, this time Sally sent for you."

He shrugged, the other times that he had snuck in were times where Sally wasn't present or when she didn't know because none of us told her. But with her knowing, I would've guessed that coming in would've been easier.

He closed the window behind himself and walked over to the book that lay open upside down. Its perfectly blunt edges, now being slightly deformed. As he picked it up slowly my face heated up.

How was I supposed to explain this to him?

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he turned the cover to face me and ran a questioning gaze over me.

"Brides guide?"

I nodded and ducked my head as heat filled my cheeks.

"Now why would you need that?"

His tone was light, almost defying the calm look on his face, he sounded amused.

"...I just wanted to do some research."

He hummed thoughtfully and flipped through a few pages as I stared at the soft white rug beneath my feet. I heard the flipping sound stop and peeked up to see his eyes squint.

"First night secrets?"

I blushed cherry red and toyed with my fingers, a habit I had developed when in front or around him.

"I-I'm not there yet."

I whispered in a weak voice as his eyes transferred to me, his gaze was strong and heated. One that I could feel without having to look at him to double check. He shut the book and placed it on the desk beside him before motioning me closer with his index finger.

I gulped before taking a step forward, his finger twitched again and I took another step forward. He leaned against the desk and folded his arms deciding to speak with words rather than actions.

"Come closer."

I hesitated before stepping closer till I was only a few feet away from him. As soon as I was within arms reach, he pulled me forward by my waist. I gasped as his hard chest pressed against me and my breathing halted as my eyes met his.

I lowered my gaze without another word, the action making him grasp my chin and tug it upwards to look into my eyes again.

"What is it that you called me for?"

He questioned as I stiffened and shook my head forcing a smile to my face.

"N-nothing, I was just wondering if we could r-relax like old times."

His grip momentarily tightened around my jaw before relaxing again as he drew soothing patterns with his thumb over the place he had pressed.

"Now why would you lie to me Adira?"

I gulped and shook my head.

"Adira."

His voice was low and sent a rush of goosebumps flying over my body as the heat in his eyes seemed to prick my skin.

"...I..."

I trailed off and he used his hand to make our eyes meet yet again after I had turned them away.

"Neither of us has ever... done a-anything like what the book says."

I watched as the ghost of a soft smile danced on his lips.

"Trust me baby, I would've done so much more had it not been for the fact that I didn't want you running away."

I swallowed as my mouth dried from his words. Had he just implied what I think he had? Staring into his eyes, I knew for a fact that he had meant every word of what he had just uttered.

"Is that why you called me here?"

I nodded slowly while searching his eyes. The calm look in them didn't embarrass me as much as I thought it would, at least now I knew that he was thinking about the same things as me. We stayed silent for a few minutes, me wrapped up in his arms and him pressed close to me, that was until a knock on the door interrupted us.

I looked towards Severus and blushed when I didn't see the resolve to let go.

"severus I~"

I never managed to finish my sentence as his lips met mine and the background noise dulled into oblivion.