124. Preparations in Private.

Deangelo.

I woke up early in the morning, still feeling groggy from sleep. Sofia was by my side, which brought me comfort, but something deep down felt off. My body longed to transform into my wolf form, to experience the freedom and power it brought, but my injuries from the accident held me back. It frustrated me that I couldn't go for a run and release the pent-up energy inside me.

While I lay there, my mind drifted back to the incident that left me in this state. The memories were fragmented and confusing, like scattered puzzle pieces that didn't quite fit together. I saw glimpses of twisted metal, screeching tires, and blinding lights, and the pain I felt at that time, both physical and emotional, was overwhelming.

I desperately wanted to regain control over my body, to feel the strength surging through my veins once again. But the doctors warned me not to rush the healing process, as it could have serious consequences. So, I reluctantly accepted my current condition, even though impatience ate at me from the inside.

I glanced out the window, absentmindedly observing the world outside. And then, I noticed her. Elena, gracefully moving through the landscape, her agile figure capturing my attention. It was as if everything around me faded away, and time stood still, leaving only her in focus.

Her movements were confident and determined, her body glistening with sweat in the morning light. Every step she took was a beautiful display of strength and grace, showcasing the wonder of the human form in motion. I couldn't tear my eyes away as she effortlessly navigated the scenery, her presence captivating me in ways I couldn't fully explain.

A whirlwind of emotions churned inside me, conflicting feelings clashing like a storm. Seeing Elena like this awakened something deep within me. It wasn't just her physical appearance that held me spellbound; it was the memories that lurked beneath the surface of my fragmented mind.

A wave of unease washed over me, an unsettling feeling that settled in the depths of my being. Here I was, lying in bed next to Sofia, the woman who had been my rock during my recovery, and yet my attention was inexplicably drawn to another. Elena. The mere thought of her ignited a mix of emotions within me, leaving me feeling guilty and confused.

It felt wrong, almost forbidden, to admire another woman while being in Sofia's presence. The inner turmoil grew stronger as I grappled with the conflicting desires that pulled at my heart. I questioned the morality of my thoughts, berating myself for betraying the trust and affection Sofia had shown me.

But as I contemplated my actions, I couldn't deny the magnetic force that Elena had over me. It was as if an invisible hand was pulling me towards her, tempting me with a connection that defied logic. Her image lingered in my mind, her presence vividly etched against the backdrop of my thoughts.

The turmoil of my emotions only intensified as I struggled to make sense of the depth of my feelings. Amidst the chaos, another woman emerged—a mysterious figure who haunted my memories. She existed on the edge of my consciousness, her touch and voice felt, but her face remained hidden, like a missing puzzle piece. It seemed that my mind couldn't hold the memories of one woman without intertwining them with another.

The jumbled mess of my thoughts left me feeling confused, questioning who I really was. Why did I find myself drawn to multiple women, each one evoking a different set of emotions within me?

Sofia tossed and turned restlessly in bed, disturbed by dreams I couldn't fathom. Guilt crept up on me, intensifying the unease I already felt. Determined to find some distance from these conflicting emotions, I slipped out of the room quietly, leaving Sofia to find her own peace.

As I descended the stairs, seeking solace in the familiar embrace of the kitchen, Mrs. Cali, a kind and nurturing presence, was taken aback by my unexpected appearance at this hour. It broke away from the routine I had established during my recovery. Mrs. Cali, always perceptive, noticed the turmoil etched across my face.

Assuming it was hunger that made me restless, she offered me food. But my appetite was overshadowed by the weight of my heart. I explained that I simply needed someone to talk to, as my mind was on the brink of exploding with unanswered questions and frustrations.

I mustered a weak smile and replied, my mind burdened with turmoil, "Mrs. Cali, I hope I'm not interrupting anything. I just needed someone to talk to."

Mrs. Cali's concern deepened as she observed the heaviness in my gaze. "Of course not, alpha. Please, sit down. I'm here to listen. What's been troubling you?"

Taking a seat across from her, I nervously drummed my fingers on the table, struggling to find the right words to convey the confusion that plagued me. "I feel lost, Cali," I began, my voice tinged with frustration. "Since the accident, there's this disarray in my mind that I can't shake off. It's like the pieces of a puzzle scattered everywhere, and I can't make sense of them."

Mrs. Cali nodded, her eyes filled with understanding. "It's not an easy journey, alpha. Your path to recovery is filled with challenges, both physical and emotional. Sometimes, it can feel overwhelming."

Letting out a sigh, I slouched my shoulders. "I miss who I used to be, the clarity I had before. Now, it feels like I'm grasping at fragments of memories that slip away before I can fully grasp them."

Mrs. Cali's voice carried a soothing tone as she spoke. "Healing takes time, my dear. It's a process of rediscovering yourself, of putting together the puzzle at your own pace. Be patient with yourself."

Our eyes met, and in that moment, vulnerability and a longing for answers shone through mine. "But how do I find my way back, Cali? How do I untangle this confusion and make sense of it all?"

Leaning forward, Mrs. Cali's voice was gentle yet firm. "You find your way back by embracing the unknown. Allow yourself to explore, to connect with your present experiences, and trust that your true self will guide you."

Her words struck a chord deep within me, igniting a flicker of hope amidst the fog of uncertainty. "So, it's okay to feel lost?" I asked, seeking reassurance.

Mrs. Cali nodded, her eyes filled with compassion. "Absolutely, alpha. Sometimes, it is in those moments of vulnerability and uncertainty that we uncover the most profound truths about ourselves."

I pondered her words, my gaze wandering to the window as I got lost in my thoughts. It dawned on me that Mrs. Cali's wisdom held a profound truth. In this journey of rediscovery, I needed to let go of fear and resistance, embracing the currents of change and placing my trust in my own inner strength.

Sofia.

I was getting desperate. Each day, it became clearer that Deangelo was slipping away from me. Even with the manipulation, I was still not having him in my clutches just as I wanted. It broke my heart and filled me with an urgent need to take drastic action, to reclaim what was rightfully mine.

The weight of this realization hit me hard, and I knew I had to act quickly and decisively if I wanted to separate Deangelo from the people and circumstances that threatened to erase me from his life. The mere thought of losing him, of being replaced by his past, terrified me. The fear of being forgotten, discarded like a forgotten toy, consumed my every waking moment. It ate away at my soul, pushing me to take risks, to manipulate the situation in my favor.

My frustration grew. Deangelo was recovering well, which was a relief, but it felt like he didn't need me anymore. I wanted to take care of him, but he insisted on doing things for himself. He even rejected the breakfast I made, claiming it made him lazy. It seemed like I was losing my place in his life.

To make matters worse, he showed no interest in being intimate with me. All he wanted was to cuddle, which was sweet, but it wasn't enough for me. I longed to feel desired, to feel needed. It felt as if he only saw me as a caregiver, nothing more. I knew I had to do something drastic to hold onto him, to prevent him from slipping away.

I was spiraling, consumed by fear and desperation. The Amato park was closing in on us, and we had to take action swiftly. So, I devised a plan. I invited Deangelo to a special dinner, hoping to catch him off guard and sway his emotions in my favor.

As we sat at the table, I took a deep breath and gathered the courage to tell him a lie, a lie that could save us.

I looked into Deangelo's eyes, trying to convey the urgency of the situation. "We were supposed to get married," I said, my voice trembling slightly.

Deangelo's eyes widened in shock. "What?"

"Yes, we were planning it secretly. We didn't want anyone in the family to know yet because we wanted to surprise them," I lied.

Deangelo looked at me skeptically. "I can't believe I forgot something like that."

I reached out, grasping his hand. "It's alright, my love. You were in pain and confused. But we can still have a small, intimate wedding with just our families."

Deangelo averted his gaze, lost in thought. I anxiously waited, hoping he would believe my words and return to me. Finally, he looked back at me and spoke. "I need some time to process all of this."

My heart sank as he got up from the table and left the restaurant. I knew I had to give him space, but I couldn't shake off the feeling that I was losing him. I had to do whatever it takes to keep him safe, even if it meant lying to him.