I need space

Divya POV

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I can't stand in front of him, so I ran into the kitchen and crying. He tortured me so much with his words. He killed me everyday with his acts. He hurt me and didn't give me a chance, to explain myself. He didn't trust my love.

I know he realized his mistake, but my heart is unable to accept him as my husband though. I'm not ready to believe him. I don't want any care or love from him because I am not expecting that from him anymore. I would never allow him to hurt me again. I already decided to live my life only for my baby. I am staying in this relationship just for my baby.

My hand went down to my stomach. 'Baby always remember, Mumma loves you so much. Please don't hurt me like your daddy' I whispered painfully and wiped my tears away.

After 30 minutes, I finished making the food. I called Daksh for breakfast, and we sat down to eat and started eating breakfast.

“This is really delicious and much better than I was expecting it to be,” he compliments. I didn't react to his compliments.

All of a sudden, his cell phone rang. He attends the call, "Hello sri, how are you? He asked happily.

I know Sridar. He is Daksh classmate. He is very close to him from high school. We studied in the same school, but they are seniors to me. Sridar always treats me like his own sister. He is really very nice guy.

"Of course, we will definitely come. I'll be there at 6 pm. I promise" he said and hung up the phone.

"Doll, you know Sridar na? He invited us on his engagement party tomorrow at 7 pm. We are going so get ready for the party at 6 pm" he said with full of excitement.

"You can go. I'm not coming for the party" I told him uninterested.

"Come on, Doll. For the sake of sridar, please come with me" He gave me his puppy-dog eyes, and I couldn't say no.

"Okay, I will come only for Sridar" I said and finished eating and washed all the pans and plates I had used.

Soon it would be time to prepare lunch. As the lunch was prepared, I went back in my room and washed my face and took some rest as it was still half past twelve. I sat on bed after taking my pregnancy book out of my cupboard and started reading it.

After few minutes, I heard the door opened. From the corner of my eyes, I saw Daksh slowly approached me. He looked reluctant and nervous at the same time. He sat on the bed in front of me. I didn't look at him. I pretend I've been reading the book. I held the book right in front of my face because I don't want to see his face.

After sometime, I felt he removed my saree revealing my stomach, and I found his hand roaming on my stomach, “what the hell are you doing?" I was looking at him angrily and immediately held his hand.

"I read that we need to bond with the baby by doing things like singing or talking to them, so I want to try it" he said gesturing to my pregnant belly. I sighed and left his hand.

He brought his right hand on my stomach once again and started caressing my belly, "Hey baby. I'm your Daddy. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for ignoring you for a last three months. I am sorry for all the mistakes and hurt that I've caused you. I love you baby from the bottom of my heart. I am feeling so sad and regretful for my behavior baby. Please try to forgive me. I would not do this never again because you, and your mom are my world. My love for you two are bigger than my life" he cried out learning his head on my stomach.

The sight folding in front of my eyes broke me million times. My throat went dry, and my heart raced incredibly.

"I know baby, you don't know me yet, and I haven't seen you, but I love you so much. Words are not enough to explain myself how much I love you. You're my precious baby."he said crying into my belly.

This was my first time seeing him this way. His sweet word made tears form before my eyes. I cursed myself for being like this.

"You know baby. I still can't believe you're going to be here in 7 more months. I can't wait until you're actually here. We'll spend a lot of time together, me, you and your mommy. I'll teach you how to play the guitar and how to play video games, and I'll teach you basically everything I know. I got you a special present for you when you arrive. Little stuffed toys for you to sleep and a big teddy bear for you." He said to my stomach touching it carefully. I felt the tears fell in my eyes.

Why am I feeling this way? I hate him, right? Then why am I hurting knowing that he's feeling hurt?!

Suddenly, Daksh eyes locked mine. His eyes sparkled with different emotions as he stared at me, "You know baby. I am really very lucky to have your mommy in my life. But I hurt her a lot. I really care for you and your mommy. I'm sooo SORRY for everything I've done, so all I have to say is that I love you and your mommy. I really don't know how to make your mommy understand me and prove that I am changed. Please tell her to give one chance to me. Please tell your mummy to forgive me, baby. I'm sooo sorry" he begged.

Seeing him beg and cry like that almost broke my heart and melted at the same time. But then the anger won.

"Okay baby, you take a rest. I will talk to you later, and you better let mummy rest now, and I promise. We're gonna have the best family. I love you so much my precious baby" he finished and kissed my belly.

After that he came close to me and kissed the top of my head, "Please Doll, let me hug you." He said, grabbing my hand in the process. Pulling me in for a hug. His scent, I will miss, his touch, his lips, his black orbs, his everything. I cannot help but let my tears fall down. I felt my chest tightened painfully.

Why am I so weak when it comes to this idiot?

"Sweetheart, I'll do anything to make everything between us right. Just tell me what to do, and I'll do it, just don't push me away. Please" I bit my lower lip as I felt his warmth around me. I want to hug him and kiss him. But something inside me is preventing me from doing so.

"Please give me a one last chance. I will never let you down again. I know I broke your heart badly. How will I rectify my faults if you do not give me another chance?" He pleaded and buried his head on the crook of my neck. I closed my eyes as his scent tickled my nostrils. I missed everything about him and feeling him this close felt so good. A shower of pity washed over me as I placed my hand in his hair and hugged him tightly.

No heart! Don't be like this! Why am I feeling this way?

"Shh...Don't cry, Doll. I'm sorry for making you cry. You know how much I hate seeing you cry. I can't take it" He said gently while consoling me.

I didn't even realize that I'm crying until he said that.

He broke the hug and kissed my forehead and cupped my cheeks. Our gazes met, and I could see how much he missed me just by staring into his eyes.

His eyes went down to my lips. I gulped. He placed his lips over mine. My body went still. He kissed me passionately nibbling and sucking my lower lip. The kiss was full of love, longing, desire and hunger. When my lips finally moved to sync the movements of his lips, he groaned with joy. My hands moved at the back of his neck, forcing his lips more onto mine. I felt dizzy with excitement. The kissing turned passionate, and he pushed me to the bed without breaking the lip lock. He deepened the kiss. I moaned with pleasure.

I missed kissing him like this!

Suddenly, his past words echoing in my mind

You easily agreed to have sex with me.

It's easy for you to sleep with anyone.

You're such a sl*t.

I stopped dead in my tracks. My lips stopped moving. Tears started flowing under my eyes. Daksh broke the kiss and looked at me worriedly.

He cupped my cheeks, "Doll, You are Okay??? "He asked me with a concerned eye. I pushed his hands away and swiftly stood up from the bed and made my way towards the washroom. I opened the Shower tap and sat with a thud on the floor burst out in tears.

He accused me of cheating on him, but here I was allowed him to kiss me. How can I give in so easily to him, to let myself fall for him once again, but what would happen when hurt me once again?

I can't stop being disgusted at myself for letting him kiss me.

Daksh entered the washroom, and he saw I was crying under shower fully drenched. He ran to me and closed the shower tap. He made me to stand up and asked, “what are you doing?” he asked and there was pain in his eyes.

"I am punishing myself for giving in so easily to you" A flash of hurt crossed his face.

“Who gave you the rights of punishing yourself? It's my fault. You have to punish me for not trusting you" he said, held my wrists and pulled me closer to him.

"Slap me." He held on to my hands and made me slapped his face. I pulled my hands away, but he was holding on it so tightly.

"Come on Doll. Slap me, hit me. If that made you feel better. I don't blame you for being mad at me, but please forgive me." He made me slapped his face again and again - so hard. His cheeks turned into red.

"No Daksh! Stop please stop!" I clenched my fist pulling my hands away from him. I quickly ran out of the bathroom. I opened the balcony door and the wind blowing cool breeze hits my body making me to hug myself. Daksh saw me. I was standing here. He came to me and wrapped a towel around my body and pulled me into the room.

"Sweetheart, Scold me for my mistake but please don't punish yourself. Just tell me, what can I do to make you to forgive me"? He asked desperately.

"I'm still hurting and I need to heal first. I need some space away from you so that I could forgive you. I need time to find myself again until don't touch me. Just stay away from me" I said, my voice is barely more than a whisper.

"Is this what you want? Do you want me to leave?" He asked me painfully.

My mind says yes, but my heart says no. I'm hurt because of him, but my stubborn heart still loves him.

"Yes" I whispered. Hurt were written all over his face when he heard what I've said.

"Sweetheart, I love you and I will give you the space. I will stay away from you" He said, and I could see the sadness and Pain in his eyes as he stared at me.

"Please change your dress" He said and then left the room. I stayed on my position for I didn't know how long before I realized that I was already crying. My heart was shouting for me to follow him, but my mind was keeping me from doing so. I wanted him to give me space, but now I'm regretting it.

Argh!! I'm going crazy!

I shut my door and got changed into my white top with long skirt. I saw Daksh leave the house and get into his car. I was looking out the window while crying.

My mind won't let me rest until he came home, so I've been lying here for hours, thinking, regretting, wanting. I felt my stomach rumble. I looked at the clock again. It was 4.30 pm.

"Sorry baby, mommy forgot to eat lunch" I said rubbing my tummy softly. I got out of my room and went downstairs to eat while I was eating my thoughts drifted into Daksh. He didn't eat lunch. I don't know whether he ate lunch or not. I don't want to eat anything, but I need to eat something for my precious diamond baby and take tablets. I sighed and finished eating I put my dishes in the dishwasher and went upstairs. I sat down on my bed and looked out the window.

Almost 6 more hours, I'm laying in my bed. The sky turned into the deep dark. Daksh did not come home. I tried his number, but he didn't lift the call. I started to feel restless thinking that he was hurt because of my words.

All of a sudden, I felt nauseated so I hurriedly went to the bathroom. Nothing came up, so I went downstairs to get some water. I sat down on the couch with my head in my hands.

Where are you Daksh? I whispered myself.

Suddenly, I heard constant knocking on the door and the bell ringing continuously throughout the house. I think he is here. I went and opened the door to find.........

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Precap - I looked at Daksh face  keenly. I couldn't help but to cry again. His hair was messy. His face looked depressed. He even has a dark circle around his eyes. I've never seen him in this kind of state before. He is in pain because of my behavior towards him.

How is it?