Chapter Sixty Two
"You are being ridiculous..."
His mouth moved closer to hers. "Do you really think that? You think what we share is ridiculous?"
"What we share is just sex, Dimitri. That's what this entire relationship has been built on. And I'm not prepared to stay with you until you get bored with me"
"Bored?" he laughed In genuine amusement. "Bored? I would give much for the opportunity to become bored by your company, Kelly. You tell me exactly how you feel.... I doubt you will ever learn to filter what happens between your brain and your mouth and you you are reliably unpredictable. There are many words to describe our relationship, but boring is certainly not one of them."
He released her then and turned and paced back across the room, a weary look on his face. "I'm sorry" he said quietly. "I have been wanting to talk to you but you wouldn't give me the opportunity to do so"
"I don't think it would make any difference" Kelly replied.
"Yes I know. It might not" Dimitri replied, "But I gotta tell you anyways. Because I know that you are so angry with me.... And you have every right to be. I have acted in a very shitty way... For my own selfish desires and I was wrong. But I can't.... I don't think I can take it if you leave... I really can't. Please don't do this, Kelly"
Kelly closed her eyes. The heat in the room was intolerable and her head was throbbing. "Why would you want to stay married to me? Because of the baby? Because the sex is good?"
"No... I mean, yes. But also because you are the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with"
"That's not true"
Dimitri ran his fingers through his hair. "Why is that so hard for you to believe? What do I have to do to make you believe me?"
"Don't ask me that" Kelly said, glaring at him, because all that time we spent together, I thought that I was having a great time with you... Getting to know you and all you were doing was going through the motions.... Figuring out a lot of ways by which you could ruin my life. Forgive me if I'm not willing to believe any word that comes out of your mouth"
Dimitri paced the room for a moment before he turned back to her. "That's not what happened. I mean, yes, I was the reason why you didn't get the contract. I know admitting that isn't going to help my case in any way, but I wasn't going through the motions with you. I swear I wasn't. I didn't fake anything.... I couldn't even if I wanted to. Every moment with you was amazing... The best in my life. I was selfish. I have always put myself and my work first. Never got emotional... Never cared or put anyone else's feelings before mine. Until you came along and I tried to fight it. I didn't want to care, but I couldn't help it. I guess what I'm trying to say here is that I'm so sorry Kelly. I know that I hurt you badly and it might be really hard for you to believe me, but I really hope that you do. You have a beautiful heart and I hope that you find a place in there to forgive me and try to make things right."
"You married me because you wanted the company...." Kelly began.
".... The company doesn't matter to me. Nothing else does. All I know is that I want you to come back home with me. It's all I care about right now. And you have to understand that no matter how it looks right now, that's not reason why I married you. I married you because I wanted you and when I found out that you were pregnant... " He stopped talking and walked over to her. When he took her hand in his, she stilled.
"What are you saying?" Kelly asked
He lifted her hand to his lips before he replied. "I'm saying that even the need to gain control of the company wouldn't have been enough to tempt me into marriage unless that was what I wanted"
Her heart pounded. "But you wanted the company"
"That deal could have been achieved in other ways" Dimitri said quietly, still holding her hands tightly. "The truth is when I saw the opportunity, I grabbed it, not because of the company but because I wanted to marry you. I only realized that myself recently. As for the baby, I meant what I said, I want a home for our child. I want us to raise this baby together"
"You are just saying all this because you are in a tight spot" Kelly said. He was a master negotiator... She knew that and she had made a fool of herself over this man. She didn't want to do it again.
"When I realized how I felt about you, it scared the hell out of me. When I asked you to marry me, I made it look like it was just about the baby but it wasn't. I just wasn't ready to admit it, that my reasons could be more complex than that...."
"Dimitri..."
"Don't interrupt me. I am trying to say something I have avoided saying for my whole life and it isn't easy" He released her hands and paced over to the other side of the room before turning back to face her. "I love you, Kelly. I married you because I love you although it took me a while before I realized it, and I want to stay married to you because I love you. There, I have said it three times and it's getting easier already" He gave a self deprecating smile and for a moment she couldn't speak.
"You do?" she asked.
"Unbelievable, isn't it?" he spread his hands in a fatalistic gesture. "Finally I fall in love with a woman who loves me in return and get lucky enough to marry her but now it's all in jeopardy because of my stupidity. I know it is a lot but how am I ever going to convince you that it's true?"
She wasn't ready to give in that easily. "How do you know that I love you in return?"
"I think.... that you have always loved me" Dimitri said. "I know because of the way you treat me, In your actions, but it has taken me a long time to recognize that too. You see, I'm not used to seeing love. Didn't grow up in a loving home and none of the women I have ever been with have loved me any more than I loved them"
"But the...."
He put a finger on her lips to silence her, "I'm not done yet" he said, and Kelly nodded. "I don't value my work or the company over you. I really don't and I'm sorry that I have given you that impression. When I realized you were gone I almost lost it. I'm sorry, baby"
He took a step back and folded his arms across his chest and lifted an eyebrow, "And now it seems to me that I have been doing a great deal of groveling and apologizing and I am hearing very little from you in return."
That statement sounded so much like his usual arrogant self that she gave a slow smile, hope building inside her. "That's because you won't let me say anything" she paused then asked, "What do you want me to say, Dimitri"
"A declaration that you won't leave again? Something about you being crazy about me too, loving me madly...." There was a glimmer of humor in his eyes. "..... That kind of thing.. If it's not too late"
"We are kinda different, Dimitri"
"A fact for which I am grateful for on a daily basis" he drawled, strolling towards her and dragging her into his arms. "Enough argument. We are different, it's true. But we are supposed to be different. Different is good"
"You are arrogant... And stubborn"
He gave a dismissive shrug. "And you speak sometimes without thinking. It's part of the person you are and I love you for it"
"... And you command and order"
He slid his hands either side of her face and dropped a gentle kiss on her mouth. "And you are ridiculously, extravagantly, impractically romantic, and I love you for that too. Did I mention that you are also very beautiful and really sexy and..."
"Okay. Okay. Okay. I get it" Kelly said laughing.
"So will you come back home... With me?" Dimitri asked.
She saw the uncertainty in his eyes and it was that uncertainty that made up her mind.
"I will come back, Dimitri" She said as she walked towards him and reached up to hug him, "And I do love you"
"Yes, I do know that" Dimitri's voice was unsteady. "But I didn't know if you would be able to forgive me for the less than conventional route we took to reach this point"
"Well, the thing about love is that it is generous and forgiving" she breathed. "Love is kind and everything good. And love can perform miracles"
"That I know to be true" Dimitri said as he leaned down, his mouth hovering temptingly close to hers, "Because I found you and that truly is a miracle"
And with that he kissed her, leaving her in absolutely no doubt that as well as being generous, forgiving, kind and good, love was also perfect.
THE END
