He's Furious

Xylo's POV

Never did I thought that things would end this way. I was too busy fulfilling my responsibilities that I ended up losing someone that I really love and adore. I cannot help but blame myself, I chose to protect my people but I was not able to protect the one that I cherish the most. There was no one to blame but my own decisions in life.

How am I supposed to continue this life time?

If divines really did exist, why did they let these things happen? Clary did nothing wrong. She was full of hope and light that I never thought that I will be losing her this day. It was too shocking, I wasn't prepared for this kind of pain. Did the divines have wrote my fate this way? It was unfair.

I drank another bottle of liquor, trying to forget the last time that I saw her. It would be a little easier if I can forgot how her body looks when she was held by her father. It would be easier if I was assasinated too that night. But who am I to ask for easier life? Who am I to wish for an easy way out? Maybe, I was meant to suffer. In that way, I could feel how Clary felt.

She is probably scared that night, she was probably cold. She was probably hoping that someone would save her from those bastards. I could only guess, because I wasn't there for her. I should have stayed with her that night.

Now, I realized how painful regrets are. It will come out of nowhere, with no signs of coming. It will just hit you out of nowhere that you couldn't fight but accept it. It will let you live, but you will be hunted forever and you will never be able to escape. It will hit you whenever you are eating, sitting, talking, or even just breathing.

I could have protected her. I could have held her cold body for the last time. I couldn't even look at her for too long when she was held by father. I couldn't held her in my arms. I couldn't kissed her for the last time. I couldn't even come close to her body. I was too guilty for not protecting her. I was too guilty for depending the borders but not protecting her in the cold night.

I wish I could turn back time...to the day where we first met so I could held her longer. So I could tell her how beautiful she is, how she makes my heart beat nervously...How I love her, she wasn't able to hear those words.

I could have...and now, there was no chance left in me. Her cold body won't be able to hear those words. I was too late to realize how important time was.

Luigi's POV

"Clary Vertina has been killed, Beta." Chigo that night, when the attacks from other pack has occurred, has told me. It was too difficult to understand. I couldn't even think of it.

Chigo looks serious that night that I didn't even question him if I am hearing things right. I can only closed my fist and punched these bastards trying to attack her in the borders. I can only avenge her with these wolves. I can only make them suffer to let them feel the way she felt before they take her life away.

It was too hard to believe, she was a brilliant woman that can withstand any challenges.

Grief, of course, had occurred to me upon hearing the news. But I cannot leave my position yet, I still have to protect the borders. I have a duty to fulfill. The anger that I felt made it easier to kill these wolves from other pack, every punch that I threw have the hatred and grief that I am feeling right now. I punched them like it was the end of the world, they have taken a special woman.

The thing that I worry the most right now is my brother's condition. The way I am feeling right now is nothing to his feelings. I have proven how deep his love is towards Clary. I have never seen him that way before, he was so ready to left all the things that he have worked for just to be with her. He was ready to live a normal life just to protect her. I will never be that brave.

I couldn't imagine the way that he is feeling right now. Knowing him, he is probably blaming himself. He loved her too much and I don't know how much this will affect him. Before this incident, he argued with mother to end things with the other Vertina. He was too determined to stop the marriage that was meant for them, only for him to find peace with Clary.

Now that her death occurred, I don't think he will ever moved on. I have never see him so smitten by love, he never actually believed in it.

Clary felt like a sister to me and I needed to protect him from my brother, the reason why I needed to bring some sense in his head. But in the end, after letting me punch him nonstop because he was feeling guilty for Clary, I have understood how deep his feelings towards her.

When I went home, I found Alpha in his study room. He was a wreck, several bottles of liquor was at the ground. I could see that he is not even drunk from those liquor, he was in fact not in his right mind. He was sitting on the floor, he was a messed. I couldn't comfort him, I can only look at him.

There's a hint of tears in his eyes too. I have never seen him this vulnerable.

He stood up and gathered some knives in his sleeves. At this state and by the looks on his face, I am completely aware of what he is about to do.

He will attack the den of the wolves that killed her.