CHAPTER 91

Damien's POV

Grandma didn't linger for more than five minutes before leaving again, so I hurriedly stepped outside to help her unlock the vehicle door.

She is attempting to cover her emotions by bowing her head at this point, but I can see tears in her eyes.

Despite my desire for Lisa to first see her grandmother, I resisted the urge to follow her.

My body is filled with a lot of intense emotions upon seeing her again. When I saw her leaving a bookshop with a large tummy, I felt proud and an unintentional grin appeared on my face.

Since she left the flat this morning for the bookshop, we have been following her. In addition to Jude, who is operating the vehicle, we are also joined by my private eye, Fred.

In the front, Fred is seated close to Jude, while Grandma is seated next to me in the rear.

After we arrived in Paris, Fred was finally able to locate her phone. I chose to bring him along to make our search easier since it was a little difficult to accomplish it from America.

Grandma just informed me that Lisa is in Paris; she is unsure of Lisa's specific whereabouts.

She asked, and I didn't want her to call Lisa. I believed that arriving here unexpectedly would be the best course of action to ensure that she wouldn't disappear once again.

Her large tummy only enhances her beauty. She is still as composed as ever, but as she left the apartment where she is living, my heart hurt.

It has the appearance of an old apartment packed with antiques and items from ancient archives.

But when I went inside to look around, the place didn't resemble what I had pictured. From the inside, it looked nicer, although it was still dated.

Grandma's order to Jude to "Let's go" jolts me out of my daydream.

Should I leave, Grandma?

"No. not now. Some other time," she responds, suddenly cutting me off.

Despite not understanding why Mom doesn't want me to see Lisa, I nod in agreement. I've been itching to carry out that. I'm shocked that I won't get to see her today.

What took place? Did she expel her grandmother? What happens if she leaves again?

As the automobile roars to life and pulls away from the apartment, I can't help but be curious.

We stayed at a nearby hotel.

"Grandma, what just happened there?" I politely ask her, anticipating a response from her, but there is none.

Before speaking, she is quiet for some time. "My feelings took control."

My brows wrinkled in perplexity. "What happened?" you ask.

She looks at me as she turns. "I almost struck her. I was unable to speak to her at all. I started to weep and walked away silently. The sight of me startled her. Damien, can you even begin to fathom that she didn't even seem happy?

I slap my forehead.

Before I can soothe Grandma, she turns her head away.

I tell her, "She didn't think you would come looking for her here."

"You ought to have seen the structure. The flat is not very noteworthy. Not even an elevator is present. Every time she leaves, she must take those steps. How even is she managing?

I want her to know Lisa is a powerful lady. She is dealing in that way.

Six months is plenty of time for her to have some alone time. I'm not prepared to let her leave my sight once again. Even if she doesn't want to see me, I won't give her any more space.

Do you believe she will flee now that she is aware of your presence and that I may be the next one to search for her? I gradually express my fear.

Grandma does a headshake. "No. That is why I advised against entering today. She won't be able to process it well enough. You may see her tomorrow when she has had time to comprehend my presence. There is nowhere else for her to flee. Even if she does, when she gets tired of running, she will return home shortly.

In some ways, I disagree with Grandma. If I were in Lisa's position, I would act the same way.

I still worry that she may go, and I just cannot afford it. I have to take action.

"Do you understand why she fled?" To my surprise, Grandma makes demands on me. This question has been on my mind for months. Do you believe there is more going on here than just the fact that you two fought?

She is giving me a really serious look. I mumble incoherently while trying to find my voice. "Yes."

She puts her hand on my shoulder and begs, "Tell me."

I feel embarrassed as I glance down, wondering how to start and where to start. How can I explain to her that Lisa left because she was afraid I wouldn't accept our child since she was aware of my dislike of kids?

She asks me with a mournful expression, "You don't want to tell me?" and I shake my head in response.

"No, I do. I just don't know where to begin.

"Start wherever."

I inhale and breathe slowly before taking her hands and standing directly in front of her.

I was so in love with the lady I was nearly married to her two and a half years ago. We got into a disagreement one night when she was pregnant, and she stormed out of my home furious. She had an accident because I let her go without trying to pursue her due to my dumb ego.

Grandma screams and covers her lips with her right hand, which then leaves my shoulder.

Even though the anguish is still there, I smile at her and say, "She died."

"She passed away along with the child, and I always thought the child was to blame. I was traumatized, which contributed to my animosity against kids.

"After she passed away, I didn't want to be married, but my parents insisted, so I did. Lisa needed my aid, and she seemed like someone who could help me with mine too, so I agreed to sign a contract with her. My cousin Caroline informed her about my aversion towards newborns when we went to see my parents, and Lisa found out about it.

"Oh, my goodness!"

"I suppose that's why she escaped. She fears that I won't accept the child as mine. She didn't even give me a chance to speak first.

Did you tell her everything? Grandma is already sobbing, but I am smiling instead since it seems like a dream right now rather than because she is crying over my pitiful narrative.

Even while the agony from that incident still hurts, it is not as bad as it was at the time. It became difficult for me to smile.

I'm grinning because I'm recovering. I'm grinning because I'm gradually recovering from the trauma. I would never want this kid if I wasn't mending, but I really want this baby.

So that nothing horrible can happen to him, I want to be able to shield him. I want to be able to instruct him in everything. I want to be able to fulfill the fatherly role that I always imagined.

That kid, whether he's a boy or a girl, I desire. To be able to proudly declare that he or she is my heir or heiress, I want to see him or her grow in my house.

Helena really wants me to be content. I want happiness.

"I didn't mention the baby to Lisa, but she is aware of Helena's passing and the fact that she died with my child. I told her, remembering the evening at the lake home when I had told her about my wounds, "I didn't tell her everything.

She didn't say anything in response to what I said, but I was relieved. It seemed as if a heavy burden had been removed from my heart and shoulder. Isabella didn't hold me accountable for not pursuing Helena as I imagined she would, and it helped me a lot to recover and stop hating myself.

She was unaware of it, but that evening I was certain Lisa was going to help me get over the hurt from my past. She always knew the appropriate things to say or do to make me happy and forget about the past.

Just for letting her leave, I am such a fool.

Grandma begins to sob gently, and I don't notice until they become wails.

I quickly wrap my arms around her and give her a tight embrace. As she sobs into my black jacket, her hat falls off exposing her beautiful black hair, which only serves to further my desire for the lady I love, need, and want so much.

I'm Lisa Russell.

my wife who is formally wed.