Chapter 35: A Bond to Break

“Zarion…” I whispered his name, my eyes fixed on the space. God, why did that dream feel so real as if they were doing it in front of me?

Their moans felt real. Their faces felt real. The emotions I felt felt real, too. It shocked and terrified me so much that I do not know which is real and which is a part of a dream.

I reached out my hand, it slowly settled at his jaw. Then his cheeks. Until my thumb found his lips caressing softly and gently like a baby’s skin.

“Cassidy?” Zarion sighed. I moved closer and dropped my hand since I’m content now that this is real. I found myself hugging him instead and my cheeks became stained with light redness. I couldn’t utter a single word to give him a response. It was like my mouth have gone mad, refusing to voice even a single word.

I knew then that I was still in a state of shock at what happened. At what I dreamt, what I witnessed.

Surely that wasn’t a coincidence. Someone—someone—crafted that in my head.

Or maybe that wasn’t a dream at all but rather an actual experience where I’ve managed to bear witness—

I don’t have powers like that. I shook my head hard. I do not even have a tendril of any power.

“What did you see in your dream?” Elliot interrupted my self’s monologue, appearing at the door frame in this freaking cold room. His hands leaned on the doorknob, while his other hand dipped into his pocket. His face looks incredibly serious while looking at both of us like he was there for a long time already.

I clenched my jaw and looked away. “Nothing,” I simply said.

“You’re becoming a good liar, Cass,” Zarion muttered behind me and a smirk slipped in my face. I shouldn’t be grinning when I just witnessed that fucking dream. I should be devastated. Confused.

He grabbed my hands and touched them intimately. His gesture embraced my heart like a warm hug. “Try harder,” he purred.

“It was just a dream. Nothing more, and nothing less.” I grab a handful of my hair and put it on my right shoulder. “It was just a bad dream, Zarion.”

“Just a bad dream?” The reason why I don’t want to tell it is because I don’t want Zarion to overthink things. He has enough burden on his shoulders, I should not add those even more.

It was Hestia and Brandon, having rough sex, in the wilderness. Naked in the forest. Aren’t they afraid of the weather and insects?!

What would he and his best friend think of that if I said those loudly? It’s ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. That dream itself is ridiculously weird!

Involuntarily, I find myself clasping my chest and heaving a deep sigh. “It felt so real…” I whispered it enough that only I could hear—only to forget that my companions have inhuman hearing. Zarion gazes at me like I’m a piece of a puzzle he wanted to solve. When our eyes locked, I prayed to whoever God was listening to us that he would not find out.

“Yeah, you were choking yourself.” Zarion laughed mirthlessly and pushed back the hair on my ears. “Did you feel drained or does that dream taste like death?”

“Yes and yes,” I answered honestly in the end. Damn it. I feel my head exploding if I don't tell him about the wilderness thing. “Zarion, it was B-Brandon… my mate.” I inhaled deeper after muttering his name carefully. My heart aches a little even at the mention of his name. Whether it was because of hatred or longing, no one knows. Not even me. “He was with Hestia.” From the moment I said that, I anticipated that Zarion already knew the rest of the story.

I swallowed harder than before, looking at him straight in the eye as if my life depends on this confession. “They were having sex, which is normal for them by the way. And I felt hurt. I shouldn’t be hurt! I don’t have feelings for him—” Now, I am sobbing. I glanced at Elliot before fully shifting my body to Zarion. “What’s happening to me, Zarion? I don’t want this. I can’t…I can’t let him affect me like that. I don’t like him!” Elliot grinned at that. I ignored him. “Why is he even my mate in the first place? Can I choose someone else? Can I—Can I choose you instead?” Now Elliot is coughing and if I wasn’t hysterical, I could throw a boulder at him even with my feminine strength. “Please, please, I feel guilty and sick and—” I willed that raging emotion to remain at bay, “— and jealous of… Hestia. I was crying, too, while watching them. Damn it!” I finally let my tantrums take hold of me. Zarion was right, I am a child. I am acting like a child.

Zarion grabbed me by the shoulders, rubbing the back of my head as if I was an infant crying. “Shush, it’s alright. Your emotions are valid.”

Punching his chest softly, I crooned. “No, it’s not. I only love you, Zarion. No one else. Not even my mate…not even that shitful of a devil Brandon!” He stopped brushing my hair for a second when he heard me cursing at his brother. “No one else,” I repeated solemnly. No one else, no one else. No one else! I chanted the phrase all over again until it drowned at the bottom of my mind. His grasp on my shoulder tightened and I couldn’t help it but blushed.

“Why do you think this happens?” I asked, and finally found the courage to look up at him. I couldn’t explain his eyes; it was dangerous and mysterious and cold.

“It’s just a dream, Cass,” he murmured.

“Do you think so?”

“No freaking way it was just a dream.” Elliot interrupted us, walking proudly towards the couch. “I don’t think it’s just a stupid and absurd dream!” Both of us looked over at Elliot, and the eyes of the man I love blazed with fury.

Heavens above. I think they know something I do not.

Zarion removed his hands from my body and pushed away his hair that blocked his forehead. “This is bad.” His angled jaw tensed,  fingers curling into a fist. He stands up from the couch, walking towards Elliot and pauses only a breath away from the healer. “She,” he pointed at me while looking at Elliot, whose expression is no longer amused, “is now experiencing the repercussion of the mate bond.”

“What do you mean?” I interfered.

Zarion ignored me. “Is there no other way to reject Cassidy’s mate other than waiting for the full moon to turn her?”

“I don’t know, man. Turning her into a werewolf is risky enough—”

“Fuck! I don’t care! Find a remedy or something from your silly little books! Or else it’s going to consume her body and eat her soul!”

“Calm down, okay. I’m going to try—” I gasped in my seat when Zarion grabbed Elliot on the collar. “You’re not going to try. You will find another way, alright?”

“Zarion…” I whispered, tugging his shirt because I don’t want them to fight over a ridiculous dream I had. I don’t want them to fight over me. Two Alphas have already fought over my presence, I can’t risk Elliot to join the two brothers. “Come on, don’t be like this to Elliot.”

“Fine!” Elliot replied and pushed Zarion’s chest away. The latter took a step back and looked at me with an apologetic look. Elliot licked his lower lip.  “I’ll find something, okay? Let’s just chill outta here!”

“We all are chill. It’s winter, remember?” Unfortunately, I was the only one who found my joke funny.