Chapter 9: Love over Family

My heart won over my mind, my emotions took over any rational thoughts swarming within my brain. Nothing can stop me from going out into this castle now. Nothing—not until I find Zarion in the woods.

Or in this city. Even if I walk barefoot across the world, I will find him.

“Wherever you go, I will go, Zarion,” I whispered, letting the wind carry my words to wherever he is.

“One step outside the castle, Cassidy, and you’re gone from our family.” I paused, bones stiffening. It’s as if I felt someone pour a pail of icy cold water amid the harsh winter weather. “If you go out tonight, I will abandon you—leave you. I will forget that I had known a family that goes by the name of Cassidy Salem Blythe.” Bile rose in my throat. Fear, not for myself but for the promise that—for eighteen years—I just broke now. You will take care of your grandmother, Cassidy. My mother once wrote in her journal, directly addressing me. I exhaled, willing the air to enter my lungs again. Pain etched in my chest of what my mamita said.

This is how it feels to be hurt after all, fire burned inside me. Not of anger, but fury for love. For love taking over my mind and soul the moment I need it the most.

“I’m already a lady, an adult. And this decision—whatever the consequences may be—lies in my hands.”

She means it. I mean it. She’s going to abandon me once I step out of the castle’s threshold. But I love him, my heart whispered, convincing me to go along with the original plan: find Zarion, tell him I love him, and invite him to live in my—our—castle as we build our family from scratch. My grandma may have passed that moment already and I will lay her in the crypt beside my parents. She may not hear my thoughts…but I will show it through my actions.

//

I’m trying to control the bursting of these various emotions all at once. Pain. Sadness. Love. Fear.

One step outside the castle’s huge oak doors, and I’m gone here. Forever. As long as my mamita lives, I am not welcome in the Blythe Castle even if it bears my last name.

“Oh my dear, Cassidy…” she breathed, stopping at the middle of the stairs. “You don’t even know what love is!” I turned to her, unbothered by any words she'd say to convince me not to go. But I ended up gasping, something in her reflection made the hair on my arms rise. “Mamita, there’s something at your back.”

“It's scary,” she resumed, ignoring what I just said. “He's going to crush you into pieces, not just your heart but the entirety of you.” Her palm folded, clenching and unclenching. “He will break your heart, trust me—”

“I don’t trust you in terms of my feelings.”

She smirked. “He is just on the hunt for women who will languish the beast inside him. Women who will satisfy his needs, all kinds of needs. That kind of man, Cassidy, will not be satisfied with you especially for an inexperienced such as you. He will always find someone who’s stronger, greater, and more powerful than you. You’re just an ephemera to him, child. He is not in love with you, he lusts after you.”

My brows furrowed while watching her stoic reaction. “H–How did you know about us?”

“I have eyes and ears everywhere, Cassidy. Even the walls are under my command.”

I bit my lower lip, nodding and feigning obedience.

“You are not going out,” she reiterated.

I looked at her apologetically yet a grin split my face from gloom. “What if I will?”

She jerked her chin to me, absolutely sure of her decision. There’s a tone of finalization in her voice that she had used many times to instill fear during my younger years. She’s done convincing me to stay with her. This time, I’ll stay with myself.

“Then you are not worthy as my granddaughter,” she used that same tone again. “Do not come back to me if he ever breaks your heart—or bones—which I'm pretty sure he will.”

It was at that moment that our bond was broken into a million pieces. Her cold eyes pierced through my heart, splitting it in half. Thousands of tears will be shredded tonight, I’m already doing it actually. I love my mamita so dearly, but Zarion…

I’m already eighteen. I can now choose the life I want. I will not let her write my fate.

Back when I was a kid, I knew that I would never be in this castle forever . I am of noble blood, yes. But I knew this moment would come, and this…this is the moment that I’ve been waiting for.

"I'm sorry, mamita..." I breathe, the last one I shall do inside this castle. Weeping as I ran away from her—and from the castle that I’ve grown ever since I was a kid.

I chose Zarion over my grandmother. I chose love over family. She may hate me for now, but I will be back soon. I’ll worry later if she won’t let me inside the Blythe Castle. I will prove to her that Zarion will reciprocate my deepest love for him.

“I’m going to find this mysterious man who made my heart whole again,” I vowed.