CHAPTER 59

"How's your head?" Levi asked me as soon as he entered our room from outside.

He was carrying a food tray and looked at me intently. It was simple to wear and looked like it had been awake for a while so I smiled.

"Where have you been?" I asked him and I just kept looking at him.

It sat next to me and fixed my hair. I rubbed my eyes because I just woken up so when he kissed me, I immediately stay away from him.

"I haven't been able to—"

“It’s fine. I want a kiss,” he said sullenly, telling me that I just asked.

I quickly left his side and went straight to the bathroom to wash and brush my teeth. When I finished, I found him still sitting on the bed staring at me.

"Stop staring, Levi," I said to him because he still wouldn't let go of me with his stare as if he wanted to melt me.

He smirked and stood up. He stood behind me and I could clearly see in the mirror that he was covering his face with my neck. I could feel his hot breath there.

"Then stop being pleasingly beautiful, Rae," he whispered. “Especially when you’re wearing my polo...” he added.

I flinched because of what he said and quickly looked at my whole being. I was just stunned when I just noticed it. After we did that in the ocean, we all still had a drink. The last thing I remembered was our return to the cottage and what happened next was erased from my mind.

Sometimes, I don’t even understand myself anymore. There are times when I remember everything that happened when I was drunk, there are also days when I don't. So I can't remember if we did anything else after going back to our room so this is what I'm wearing now. My nipples are also visible! My god!

“Let's eat,” I told him shyly and walked away from him.

I just heard him laugh and followed me to the table across from the terrace.

"Did you tell Jaxon to come here?" He suddenly asked me a serious question as we sat down.

I immediately looked at him and shook quickly. "No, why?"

“He’s here. I saw him earlier at the restaurant. He’s looking for you, Rafaella told me,” he replied as he started eating.

I just shrugged and started eating. I remember our last phone conversation when he called me before we headed here. He really wants to talk to me and he was insisting so I just let him. I can't deny him because somehow we got along.

When we finished eating, we both got ready and left the hotel at the same time. We found everyone already preparing for the taping.

“Sir Levi, you need to sign it. This is the new contract for Ma’am Astraea’s movie adaptation,” Kat suddenly approached us and handed some papers to Levi.

I just smiled at her as she turned to look at me as this man took turns signing next to me.

“Don't you even read? Maybe you don't want to— ”

“No need. It’s you. I don’t care about anything but you,  ” he simply interrupted what I was going to say so I just raised my eyebrow.

“But for other clients, he doesn't want the contract not to be read. How many more times does he change when he sees something wrong,” I heard Kat whisper with a laugh.

I just scratched my head and was embarrassed to smile at her. She just winked at me and left when Levi handed her the papers. Before he could speak, Pola suddenly approached me with a wide grin so my forehead furrowed.

"Ma'am Rae, someone was looking for you at the restaurant, earlier," she politely told me so I almost laughed.

Is she making fun of me?

“Stop with that‘ ma’am ’, Pola. Who is it?” I laughed questioning her.

I even saw her turn next to me before answering.

"Jaxon," she uttered as if still hesitant.

I simply glanced at Levi whose jaw suddenly tightened as he looked at me.

"What does that idiot need from you and even followed you here?" he asked me in a tone of disgust.

I looked lazily at Pola and just nodded at her then left. I turned back to Levi when she left.

“He just wants to talk to me,” I told him softly and adjusted the button-down he was wearing.

His forehead furrowed even more so I laughed.

“And what else are you going to talk about? You don’t have to face that man, Astraea,” he told me firmly and looked at me sharply.

I just stared at it and then fixed his hair. I intentionally messed it up in front and I smiled as he became even more handsome there.

“I only want you, Levi. You’re the father of my child and no one can change that. Do you think Jaxon is a big threat to you?” I teased him so his forehead furrowed even more.

I kinda like it when he’s pissed off. I don’t know what he looks like to me right now but I like it. It’s kinda addicting. The way he’s being protective of me is addicting. It was as if I wanted to perish every day just so he could visit me and protect me.

“Jaxon is not a threat to me, Astraea. I just don’t want him near you. I don't trust him,” he insisted but tried to soften his every word.

“He’s still your cousin. We were together for five years in another country but it never entered my mind to hit him. Stop being so paranoid and clingy,” I told him while tip-toeing and trying to reach his lips to give him a kiss.

When he saw that I was having a hard time because he was so tall, he deliberately bent down to greet my kiss. I didn't even pay attention to the people watching us. I do not care anymore.

“We'll just talk and that's just for a moment. I'll be right back,” I told him softly and still didn't adjust my footing on the ground.

He even reached to my forehead and showered me with kisses there so I smiled even more. When he nodded, I turned my back on him to head to the restaurant. I even saw Hoseah watching us so I immediately stared at her.

When I arrived at the restaurant, my eyes immediately searched for Jaxon. I immediately went to him when I saw him. He even stood up when he saw me.

“How are you and Lorraine? I haven’t seen her for a week now,” he opened up to me when we sat down.

“She’s just in the mansion, Jax. Haven't you been home yet?” I asked him in surprise.

I could see it avoiding looking at me so my forehead furrowed even more. I suddenly remembered what Yerim had told me about his past with Levi. Has there been a gap between them for a long time and even going home to the mansion, he can't do? What really happened?

“So, you’ve been back together? Why it was so fast, Rae?” he asked me with some annoyance.

I kept looking at him just waiting for my answer. His eyes are now reddish and his jaw is clenching. I don't know if I can see the anger in his eyes but it looks like that.

“He’s still the father of my daughter, Jax. Why are you still asking me that?”

"And you suddenly forgot how much you hated him then?" He asked making me stop breathing for a second.

I averted my eyes from him to find the answer to his question, but I could see nothing. It was as if all the anger I had felt toward him had suddenly been erased from my mind. I didn’t even see this coming. I also don't know why he is still opening up about this issue now even though I know that's not what we should be talking about.

I firmly focused my gaze on him as I was trying to calm myself.

"I thought you wanted to apologize for what you did back then that's why you're here," I told him lazily he was about to leave but he immediately held my hand.

“Rae, please... I’m sorry, I was just carried away. Please, talk to me,” he begged holding my wrist tighter.

I forced myself to remove that and violently sighed.

“Why did you help me then, Jaxon? Was it your plan all along? To manipulate everything? Yerim told me that you were just using me to get even on Levi. Is that true?” I couldn't help but question him.

I saw his momentary shock but that disappeared immediately and was replaced by a sharp expression. It was already ringing in the ear and I could clearly see how he was suppressing what he was feeling.

I suddenly become disappointed with what I’m seeing right now. I feel like I don’t know him anymore. He doesn’t seem to be the Jaxon I’ve been with for five years.

"Answer me, Jax, please," I said while holding back the explosion of my emotions.

“I... I’m sorry, Rae. I really am. At first, that was my goal but— ”

"How dare you!" I screamed in pain and let my palm fly over his face.

I got up from my seat because of the extreme tension and he became alert because of what I did.

“You even approached my daughter just for your own reasons? What the fuck were you thinking?” I couldn’t stop shouting at him as I chased my breath in rage.

“Rae, please... listen to me first. It’s not my intention — I mean, it was my intention before but that changed when you gave birth to Lorraine. I’m sorry, please... I really am,” he explained while trying to reach my hands so I immediately walked away from him.

"I don't know what else I'm going to believe in you, Jaxon. Why are you even here?! Aren’t you done with your plan with me?” I asked him in pain and remorse.

I don’t know what to feel right now toward him. I can’t believe what I see and hear now because my mind can’t accept that. The Jaxon I met was different from the Jaxon I am facing today.

"Rae, calm down and talk to me, please... I need you to listen carefully," he told me emphatically and pleadingly so I just nailed it.

"I don't want to hear it anymore," I also told him emphatically and turned my back on him.

But before I could get any farther, I automatically stopped walking when I heard what he said next.

“It’s about your father, Apollo Laxamana. Levi’s dad, Tito Saldy... he ran into your dad.”

Confused, I went back to the place where the taping was taking place. I couldn’t help but think correctly as my eyes searched for Levi. I feel like my heart is going to explode in extreme pain and I need him now to calm me down. When I could not see him, I went straight to the farm. It was dark because I still stayed a few hours on the beach thinking.

Frightened, I made my way to the farm to look for Levi. When I looked at Father Henry's hut I saw two large groups of people standing there, apparently fighting because they were shouting.

“I told you to stay away from me! Don't you know how to understand?!” Levi shouted from afar.

I know his voice very well so I can’t go wrong. Who is he talking to?

“I was just trying to help you! Why do you seem so scared to see Rae that you're with me together? Is it still about what happened then?” A woman shouted back.

It’s Hoseah. I could clearly see her bulk in front of Levi so I’m sure she was.

I remained standing away from them and listened to what they were arguing about.

“I don’t fucking care about what happened before especially to you, Hoseah. I don't care about you anymore so stop. If you want someone to fall into your trap again, just go to Jaxon again because I don't want Astraea to overthink anymore!” he told the woman emphatically.

I even saw its violent and firm curses multiple times and turned back to Hoseah.

"I fucking love her and none of you will understand that! I love her and our daughter so much that my heart seems to explode because of how I feel, that I have never felt for you or anyone else! Only for her, Seah, so please, stop ruining my family,” he added so I kept crying.

My chest continued to throb loudly as I stared at them in the distance and repeatedly replayed in my mind what he said. I suddenly remembered what Jaxon had said earlier. His dad... Tito Saldy ran and killed papa.

I grabbed my chest and gently stroked it because of its extreme pain. I don’t know how I’m going to feel and how I’m going to release it. I don’t know if I can even face him because of what I found out but because of what I heard, it is slowly changing.

"Rae?"

I looked up when I heard his voice. When I saw him, I almost ran to him and buried my face in his chest and there wept and cried. I could feel him hugging me tightly.

“What’s wrong? What happened? Where have you been? Why are you crying? Hey...” he asked me softly as he kissed me on the head.

I’m scared, Levi. I'm afraid I might not be able to fight for you again just because of what happened then and the people involved. I don’t want to let go of you anymore but how can I fucking do this?