Chapter 6

Cooper

Sunday 7.24am

I grab the coffee pot and take it into the living room where I’ve set Ellie up. At some point, I need to check my phone, but she hasn’t either, and even though she’s not mentioning it, I know she’s getting ready to leave.

I left my phone on the bar, and I’m pretty sure it’s out of juice, so I plug it in before I take a seat on the sofa beside Ellie.

She has her nose in a fishing magazine she found and smiles as I refill her coffee. “Thanks. Tell me more about this crazy secretary you have.”

Since we agreed to not talk about anything inflammatory, I decided workmates were fairly safe.

Ellie still has her knee propped up, as she screws up her nose. “Why do you put up with her if she’s so difficult?”

I shrug. “She’s a great secretary. And she’s loyal. That’s hard to find.”

She tilts her head. “I guess in your line of work, privacy is a big issue?”

I nod. “It is. We handle a lot of sensitive information.”

At the way her forehead has creased, I’m pretty sure we’re straying into a murky area.

And as much as I’d like to keep humoring her request not to talk about herself, there’s only so long I can pretend I’m completely okay with that.

“You must get that? Being a nurse, I mean.”

I think she’s going to keep stonewalling me, but a sad smile plays at her lips. “I do.”

At the sadness tinging her voice, I slide my fingers into hers. “Sorry. Forgot the rules.”

A wry smile appears as she stares down at our interlaced hands. “Have you ever seen a person die?”

My heart rate jumps a notch, and for a second I consider telling her the truth. But it’s clear she wants to talk, so I go with the watered-down version. “I was in the army.”

She doesn’t say anything for so long, I think she’s done talking, but she surprises me by speaking again. “Did they warn you? Tell you how to prepare yourself?”

My voice comes out too flat. “Too many times to count.”

She’s not looking at me as she keeps looking at our hands. “But it doesn’t prepare you does it? Nothing can.”

When I give her a grim nod, she looks at me, her voice barely above a whisper. “I’d seen people die. Been close to families when their kids passed away, so I thought I was prepared.”

She swallows hard and blinks back the tears. “There was an accident. A bad one. Bigger than anything I’d ever been involved with before. Big rig collided with a school bus.”

I grimace as her grip tightens on my hand. “I thought I was okay. I thought I could hold it together. And I did. All week. Double shifts, running on caffeine and two hours sleep, for seven days straight, I held it together.”

Her shoulders start to shake, and her voice comes out as a whisper. “But there was this girl, Courtney. She looked like someone I knew. Same hair color, same eyes. And she fought so hard, we fought so hard for her. She was in and out of consciousness. But it wasn’t enough. She died right at the end of my shift.”

I’ve seen enough PTSD in my time to recognize it when I see it. It makes so much sense she’d want to keep on moving despite being in pain.

She’s been punishing herself, hoping to outrun the trauma and the grief she’s not allowed herself to experience.

She starts to cry quietly, and without thinking, I pull her into my arms and hold her tight. “I got you,” I whisper.

As she starts to cry harder, I stroke her hair and keep my arms locked in place until my biceps are trembling from the effort of holding her.

When her sobbing starts to slow, she pulls back a little, and sniffs. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know where that came from.”

I shake my head and press a kiss to her forehead. “Don’t be sorry. I’m not.”

She smiles weakly and moves back so I can release her. “I can’t shake this. It’s everywhere I go. No matter what I do, it’s like everyone can see this sticker on my forehead saying it’s my fault.”

“And that’s why you’re up here? Taking some time out?”

She sighs and nods. “Since that shift ended, and Courtney’s mom assaulted me, I’ve started having panic attacks and they are getting worse, not better.”

My eyebrows rise. “Someone assaulted you?”

She sniffs again and uses her sleeve to wipe her nose. “Courtney’s mom needed to blame someone, so she lashed out. It happens sometimes.”

Pain flashes across her face and her hand goes to her cheek as though she’s remembering. “She punched me. Closed fist and everything. Hurt like hell, and security had to escort her out.”

I’m so floored I can’t think of a single intelligent thing to say so I keep my mouth shut.

She adjusts the blanket over her leg. “I can’t go back to working in the PICU until I can prove I’m okay. Physically and mentally. Until I speak to a counselor, they’ll stick me behind a desk, or I might be transferred to another unit.”

I let that settle in before I comment. “You don’t want to talk to the counselor?”

She shakes her head. “You aren’t the only one who likes to keep things under lock and key.”

That makes me even more curious, but I’m smart enough to know this was a huge load for her to shift.

No longer caring if I’m overstepping, I look at the pain in her eyes and have to ask. “But you still want to be a nurse?”

Her lips press together and she slowly shakes her head. “I don’t know. I really don’t. I’ve lost all my confidence. I’m so terrified of making a mistake, I keep second-guessing myself.”

I wince inwardly, wishing I could say or do something more for her, she’s clearly dealing with a choice that I can’t help her with, even if she wanted me to.

Her voice comes out uncertain, but her words fill me with way too much satisfaction. “I’m sorry I dumped all that on you. But thanks for listening.”

To keep from asking her to give more than I can deal with, I kiss her lightly. “Any time.”

As she wraps her arms around my neck, I’m more than a little concerned that I meant it.

***

Ellie

Sunday 8.12am

With Cooper off to check on something, I use the opportunity to use the bathroom, and to take a shower.

As I step into his enormous bathroom, I wince as I see my reflection in the mirror.

Despite my rough appearance, I smile as I switch on the water. As I watch the water fall onto the marble floor of the open shower, I take the moment to think.

Think. Something I’ve tried to avoid for weeks now.

A ridiculous laugh slips past my lips. The sound bounces off the walls, and I spin around in case Cooper thinks I’ve gone completely insane.

When he doesn’t appear in the doorway, I strip off my shorts and t-shirt and step under the water.

As the shower cascades down my body, I flex my hands and am thrilled to find the joints moving freely.

Even my knee feels better. Whether it was the hot pools, the enforced rest, or confessing to Cooper, I don’t know.

All I know is that I feel like I can breathe again. All because I took the chance to tell a man I didn’t even know I was going to meet.

I smile as I use Cooper's shower gel to wash my body, and lament that my hair is well overdue.

Since he has no shampoo, I switch on massaging function on the detachable showerhead, and with my thoughts still on Cooper’s skill in the bedroom, I lean against the wall, half wishing Cooper was in the shower with me.

As the water cascades down my breasts, teasing my nipples into remembering Cooper’s tongue on them, I worry I’m turning into a sex maniac.

I can’t remember ever feeling this sexy before. It’s like he’s awoken me from sexual hibernation.

As if I’ve willed him there, he appears, eyes roaming over me as a devilish smile grows. “You want some company?’

I nod, lick the water off my lip and in one swift move, he removes his jeans and steps into the shower, hard and ready.

Water cascades down my body as I beckon to him. With a grin he pulls me into him, his hard cock pressing against my pelvic bone.

He kisses me as he takes the showerhead from my hands and reaches above me and switches on the rainfall showerhead directly above us.

He slides his hands between my legs and angles the showerhead so it’s right against my clitoris.

“Voglio vederti venire,” he says.

I cling to him, balancing my weight, legs spread a little as the pressure tickles me until I can feel an orgasm building.

With the water falling on our bodies, down my breasts and nipples, I start to shudder as an incredible climax starts to grow.

I dig my nails into his shoulders as I come, my sex sounds echoing around the room.

He spins me around, places the showerhead back and pulls my back into his chest so he can caress my breasts.

I lean into him and let him finger my nipples until I’m moaning again, and when I feel his fingers stray lower until he’s grazing my pubic hair, I don’t resist.

I lean harder against him, letting him support me as I relax against his body. I can feel his hard cock against the base of my spine, so I snake a hand around, and rub my fingers over the tip.

When his finger starts to massage my clitoris at the same time as he kisses my neck, I’m just about delirious with the pleasure running through me.

He rubs me until I can feel myself growing as moist as the air around us.

I nearly curse as he uses the fingers of his other hand to gently pluck at my nipple until I’m quivering, legs shaking and the ripples of an orgasm are starting to build.

Pleasure builds to molten levels as he speaks a mixture of filthy English and Italian into my ear. “Voglio leccare ogni parte di te. I want to lick every part of you.”

“More, tell me more,” I plead.

His voice comes hot in my ear driving me to explode in his hand. “Ho intenzione di scopare così difficile. I'm going to fuck you so hard.”

I open my mouth and nonsensical words of pure primal ecstasy escape.

Water floods my mouth but I don’t care, I’m so turned on, so absolutely aroused, I come begging for him to either put his cock in my mouth or fuck me.

I close my eyes and open my legs a little wider, and picture his cock in my mouth, as I take his hand and start to suck it, muffling the sound of my incredible climax.

I keep sucking his finger, licking the water from it, pretending it’s his cock, getting even more turned on as he starts to moan in pleasure.

When I’ve come, my legs give out, and Cooper doesn’t miss a beat, just picks me up.

With a grunt, he pushes me against the shower tiles, and slides his huge cock inside me easily. “You’re so fucking dirty. Sei così fottutamente sporco,” he pants as he pumps me.

Back hitting the tiles, I press my mouth to his and drink him in as his cock rubs against my already stimulated clitoris until I’m screaming in his ear.

When my body has stopped quaking, he kisses me, and starts to move his hips faster, and faster until he’s grunting, and water is flying off our bodies.

He comes in a roar, alternating between Italian and English as he shudders so hard he shakes my body.

With an utterance of how sexy I am, he grips my hips as he gives me a final thrust as he finishes inside me.

I clasp my fingers around his neck and lean my head back against the tiles so I can catch my breath.

When he pulls back, gasping, he looks as spent as I feel.

Without a word, he puts me back on my feet and kisses me again. “I made you dirty again,” he says.

I smile. “I like being dirty sometimes.”

He chuckles and reaches for one of the towels hanging on the hook. When he steps out, he looks more than satisfied watching me under the water.

He smiles as he wraps the towel around his waist. “That’s a sight I could get used to seeing.”

With a final appreciative look at me he walks out leaving me to finish the shower I was supposed to be taking alone.

I sigh happily, feeling completely and thoroughly relaxed not to mention satiated.

With a smile, I return the showerhead to its place, step out, and grab the huge bath towel hanging on the rail.

When I wrap it around my chest, my thoughts stray from how horny Cooper has made me and I start to think about whether I’m really ready to return to work.

I’ve put off dealing with it, Cooper has kept both my mind and my body occupied, but I can’t stay here forever.

And even though I’ve ignored my phone all weekend, I know that Grace will have called me again.

A pang of guilt tickles at me as I think about whether Maggie has missed me or whether she’s put two and two together and knows I’ve been with Cooper the entire weekend.

I groan at my stupidity and am still berating myself when I step back out into the living area.

Cooper greets me with a kiss, then frowns. “Knee hurting again?”

It takes me a second to realize I must be scowling. “No. I was just thinking I should have called Maggie and told her not to worry.”

He grins. “I sent her a message on Saturday morning.”

I’m sure he’s just blown it for me. “What did you say?”

The grin grows even wider and it’s impossible to stay annoyed with him. “I told her I was going to keep you here, make sweet, sweet love to you until neither of us could walk.”

When I mock growl at him, he starts to laugh. “I just said that you were a little shook up, and your knee was so bad you agreed to stay put for a while.”

I groan and hold a hand to my head. “I’ve been here for two days, and she knows I can’t sit still for long, how am I going to explain that?”

He looks at me like I’m crazy which I probably am for trying to hide this. “How about telling her the truth?”

I take a step back, creating some space between us. He’s so intense, my skin starts to goosebump. “I’m not sure what the truth is. This was wonderful, but I’m not sure I want Maggie or anyone else knowing about it.”

He cocks his head and looks somewhere between pissed off and disappointed. “Okay, Ellie. I think I get it. This was an escape and a distraction for you.”

Indignation flows through me. “And it wasn’t for you too?”

My heart starts to pound a little faster as he just works his jaw. “Credo che non sapremo mai,” he says.

I shake my head. “I don’t speak Italian.”

He just turns on his heel, but I catch the translation as he mutters it, and it splinters my thoughts in two. “Guess we’ll never know,” he says.