05

##Preliminary

Emily

I blink several times feeling all my neurons messed up, I don't understand what he means, I can't want to understand something that will certainly go against all my principles.

"Sorry, but…" I say when I'm lost for words.

"I want you." He asserts without blinking.

"I don't understand…" I say with wide eyes, he can't mean what I'm thinking.

"You don't seem to be that slow to understand things Miss Antonelli." He speaks and I can't look him in the eyes right now.

"Okay, you said you want me. But in what sense? Are you talking about…sex?" I mutter the last distinct word in my daily vocabulary almost inaudibly.

"Yes, dear. What else could I be talking about?" He answers and I watch him study me for a few seconds.

I wonder what a murderous millionaire man is seeing in a woman like me. I never saw myself as someone sexy that turned anyone on, I was always seen as nice and cute. It's hard for me to understand why this man wants me.

"You can only be making fun of me, right?" I inquire, looking into his eyes now, he is wearing comfortable clothes and is devastatingly handsome, but I quickly dismiss that inconvenient thought.

"I'm not one to play around, Miss." He's serious and I swallow hard trying not to imagine hot scenes with this man.

"So you're suggesting that if I sleep with you, you'll give up on killing my parents?" I ask in a shaky voice.

"Yes." Confirmed without hesitation.

"This is wrong. It's very wrong and it goes completely against my morals." I said feeling hot tears wanting to come down.

I promised myself that I would marry a virgin, that's what God expects from us. It's morally correct for me, besides everything I also promised that I would never give my body without my heart together, doing what this man is proposing goes against everything I believe in, it's like betraying myself. Just thinking that if I accepted, my parents would stay alive and I would be impure and without anyone, I doubt very much that he will want to stay with me after he gets what he wants. In fact, I wouldn't want that either.

"I'm an adult, so are you. Now it's up to you, the choice." He speaks and I'm suddenly furious that I'm so embarrassed and he's like nothing's going on.

"You're insulting me like this, you know? How could you think I would have the nerve to sleep with a man just for a deal?"

"I tell you with all my sincerity, I don't need to insist on being with any woman, many women would love to be in your place. You will be the winner."

All my patience and calm died as soon as those words came out of his mouth. If I had a gun I would kill this unfortunate human being in front of me. I clench my teeth and fist with the hatred that rises in my body, I feel my face burn and anger show. How can you be so arrogant?

"I'm not like those women you might be used to! I don't have a price, I'm sure of my worth and I'm much more than that!" I exclaim furiously with tears trapped in my throat.

"I know. Which is why you are infinitely more desirable to me."

"Are you one of those people who want what they can't have?" I ask in a tone of irony. He approaches me and holds my gaze.

"I've never been in that situation, of wanting it and not being able to have it." He speaks softly right next to my face.

"But now you're in one. You can kill me, do what you want. My body is not a commodity, nor an object to be bargained for." I turn my extremely sad face to the side.

"Alright, so your parents will be killed and your siblings will be orphaned, they will ask you all the time where are their parents? Because in their view they are the best in the world, children tend to think that way about their parents, and you will say : I had the choice to free them, but I didn't and they're dead now..." He mutters mimicking my voice.

I got up from the bed and stopped for a second, I already lost a lot tonight, I lost my trust in my parents and everything that encompasses them I lost, I don't consider myself having anything to do with them anymore, I love them very much but they have to pay for what they did. The only thing I had left were my brothers, they are children who don't know about the evil in the world, who don't know what humans are capable of doing for fame and ego. They are innocent and I feel more responsible than ever for them now.

And I'm not like that, I can't know that someone died and I had the chance to do something and I didn't.

"I have one more thing to say, Miss Antonelli." I stopped and stared at him. “If you agree to be my mistress, I'll clear your parents' names, pay your family's debt, considering everything is in your name, you'll take everything they own now, you'll be responsible for everything. They will still pay for what they did, only in extreme secrecy. Your reputation and that of your family will be intact, I give you my word."

A shiver runs through my entire body. Lover? I thought he just wanted sex for one night. What must that mean? Shit, I don't have any experience with this, I'm a complete ignoramus when it comes to sexuality. Does this man really want to have sex with me like that? What did he see in me?

"And what do I have to do as your lover?" Indago trembling nervousness from head to toe.

"Give me pleasure." He says it like it's obvious.

"I guess I won't be very good at this." I speak without revealing my little secret of chastity.

"I'm willing to give you free lessons." He talks and smiles.

"You can't stand to be rejected, can you?" I ask, furious and intrigued by her terrible insistence.

"Once is fine. I don't think you'll refuse me a second time." he says in a firm tone. He is very good at leading me in conversation.

I sigh imagining how I would cringe having to take off my clothes in front of some man. Nowadays people have sex all the time, they just do it most of the time, if I accept his proposal, it will be my body that he will have, that's all, there will be nothing emotional, maybe there's no need for me to have sex drama about it. Maybe it's not even that important anymore these days, I might not like the idea of my first time going this way, but I can bear it, there's a much greater cause and it'll be worth it later.

"Fine. Your condition is pretty crazy, that's a fact. But sleeping with you for one night will help my family..."

"One night won't be enough for me." I'm stunned, and I wonder what he wants from me? Is one night not enough?

"So how long do you want me to play this role in your life?" I watch him shrug.

Then I have the impression that he is not patient anymore, he seems stressed and angry, his face changes. He certainly isn't used to insisting so much to sleep with someone, obviously he has any woman in the palm of his hand whenever he wants. Perhaps my reluctance is an insult to your ego and arrogance.

"I want you for as long as I want you." He speaks.

"You know I hate you, don't you?" I inquire furiously.

"What you will feel in my arms, darling, will be a far cry from hate. I assure you." I bite my lip, suppressing the strange sensation that has coursed through my body and stopped below my belly.

This man is giving me a chance for my parents to have some hope of redemption in the future, I can never, under any circumstances let my parents die, who am I to deny someone a fresh start? I have this opportunity now and I could never turn it down. I love my family so much that I would be capable of anything.

"I accept. You made me an offer I couldn't refuse." I speak biting my lip and he holds out his hand to me. "Let's not pretend this was a civil proposal." I speak and see a look of satisfaction on his face.

"Fine, my dear. We can start with foreplay right away."

Before I can say any words, he lowers his head to my height and takes my lips, for the first few seconds I'm paralyzed in shock, but suddenly I feel a maddening heat settle in the middle of my thighs, it's like a cold flame , hard to explain, his lips are incredibly sweet and he takes mine skillfully, in a way they've never been taken.

I feel breathless and my situation gets worse when he descends with his lips to my neck, I let out a breathless moan and mentally curse myself for enjoying it, for feeling something strange in my intimacy that makes me want to touch him. His hands are holding my slim waist and they can close around them, I wonder if I can hold this man between my legs.

He kisses the entire length of my neck and down to the valley of my breasts, at some point I try to stop him but he stops me and continues his work. Then he lays me down on the bed and climbs kissing my legs, I'm going crazy with the feeling that covers my body when his lips touch my skin, it's like icy lips touching hot flames, the heat in the middle of my thighs increases and worsens when he hikes up the skirt of my dress, I feel my muscles tense.

With my breathing heavy and my body on fire, he kisses every inch of my skin until he reaches my panties, each kiss of his is a sweet shock that runs through my bloodstream, it feels good, it feels so good and right now I just want to feel, I resisted, I tried to resist, but if I'm going to do something against my will, that's good for me at least. And so far, it's been pretty good.

He pushes the cloth of my panties to the side and I instantly feel ashamed, no one has ever seen me like this, he's the first man, the first day we met, there couldn't be a stranger first time than mine . I shudder slightly and let out a loud moan when his lips land on my wet and aching intimacy from the heat he made me feel.

He starts kissing and running his tongue lightly around my throbbing clitoris, it's a magical feeling, it's so good, it's new and wonderful for me. After a few minutes of doing the same movement non-stop, I feel that I've already reached the extreme of pleasure, the delicious feeling that invades me is incredible and I see the stars with her, but when he squeezes my breast it's as if my body is divided into several pieces and came back later, it's magic, it's amazing, it's a wonderful feeling, I feel my body trembling and his breath on my skin. He smiles in satisfaction.

My throat is dry from moaning, what was that? I never imagined there was such a good feeling. When I come to myself and finally look up at him, my hands are trapped in his hair holding his head. I release immediately and throw my head back.

Maybe it would be more right for me to regret it, wouldn't it? And why do I not regret it? On the contrary? Did I like it and want more? Damn it...

"By the way, call me Joe." He talks and smiles wiping his mouth.