13

Lilian POV

It's been a minute and I am still trying to catch my breath, but it's incredibly hard with Demonia looking at me like that.

Demonia looks down at his chest then back to me with a smug grin as he gets off the bed, I see his bare bum and it's so captivating and wow... he's so beautiful.

Demonia disappears into the bathroom and I hear water running in the tub, seconds later he's coming into the bedroom, completely still naked and walking without a care as he sets his focus on me as he heads towards me.

He picks me up from the bed and carries me in his arms like a baby and I can't help but still want him again, his skin sets mine on fire with hunger, the need to always be with him any way possible consumed my wolf and I, the bond making it feel even more intense.

Demonia carries me into the bathroom and gently places me in the tub, the warm water soothes the soreness between my legs and my tired muscles, it feels so good.

"Thank you." I say shyly as he grins at me handsomely and steps into the tub behind me.

He pulls me back into his bare naked chest and leans his head on my shoulder and inhales my scent. "I'm sorry if I hurt you, does this help?" He says softly against my neck and I shake my head embarrassed.

Even though it did hurt, I'd beg him to do it again, that was even better than the first time, and I got to see his true form, it felt like we became one, and even though I should be scared from how deadly his form is, strong and powerful.. I am not afraid in the slightest of him, if anything I find him wonderful, beautiful, and great, I am lucky he is my mate.

"I love you Demonia, that was... woah." I say utterly astonished and he chuckles against my skin.

I feel him smile against my skin as he picks up a sponge and soaks it in the tub, he rubs it gently against my chest. "I love you too, did I scare you? I didn't.. it just happened, sorry if I did, you just make me lose all sense of control."

I feel my cheeks get hot and I sink lower into the water at how his words make me melt. "How.. how does it feel, when.. they come out? Does it hurt?" I ask curiously, turning to see his eyes focused on washing my skin, he shakes his head.

"No, not anymore, what about you? When do I get to meet your wolf?" He asks, his eyes shift to me and I feel my mouth water at how handsome he is with his jet black hair wet.

My wolf blushes and gets happy at the thought of shifting for him, it's all she has ever wanted since we first saw him.

I had thought about when to shift, but there have been other things on my mind... "Um, later? If your men let me outside the palace.." I mutter out quietly..

Demonia frowns and he stops cleaning me. "I had my reasons, Lilian, I couldn't risk your safety without me there to protect you, my men were just following my orders."

I shrug and sit back up against his chest. "It's just.. I haven't shifted in months.. my father... and the rumors people speak of every day.. I would like it if you trusted me as I trust you." I whisper out nervously, his eyes harden and his mouth goes into a thin line.

"What rumors?" He asks darkly and I swallow hard.

I shrug and he moves from the tub, I feel his anger come off him in waves as water splashes everywhere as he gets up and moves to wrap a towel around his waist. "Are they true?" I ask and he turns and looks at me coldly.

He closes his eyes and his nostrils flare as he runs his fingers through his wet hair.

He sigh out annoyed and looks at me. "Depends what you heard."

I shift uncomfortably and shrug. "The.. deaths... and women.. and your.. um, interests in.. stuff.."

He snorts then laughs as he leans against the wall of the bathroom opposite me. "Is that what concerns you, the women I've been with?"

I look at him sadly as I feel stupid for asking, I seem jealous and untrustworthy.

"I never killed anyone Lilian, and my kind isn't exactly virgins either, as for my 'interests and stuff', that is just another side of me.. I- I'm broken, Lilian." He moves from the all and walks towards me.

He kneels in front of the tub and his eyes soften. "That was me without you, that guy no longer exists, I promise you, Lilian.. I'm no longer that guy, I don't need all that anymore."

I look up at him and nod slowly, the pain in my chest is throbbing from the truth of his words, the rumors are true and the realization of that hurts more than I thought it would.

I can't hate him for the life he had before me, that would be unfair of me to be mad or jealous of what he did before I met him.

But to kill and torture people during... sex? Why..

I don't understand that interest, it terrifies me.

"Lilian? Say something... tell me what you're thinking, please."

I look up to Demonia and worry covers his face, something I've never seen Demonia, worried and nervous, he is always so strong and in control, I have never seen him this emotional before, not only can I see his emotions, I can also feel them and what I feel is fear on his part.

I shakily release a breath and look at him. "Would you hurt me like those.. women?"

His eyes widen and he frowns. "Of course not, that was.. just.. meaningless sex to release tension, it's not me Lilian, I don't hurt unless they asked for it."

"I will be honest with you now, but please don't think differently of me." He says nervously as he grabs hold of my hand.

"I have never killed someone personally unless it was to protect myself, but- I have hurt people Lilian, a lot. I.. this face of mine, it's the opposite of what's inside of me, I'm ugly on the inside babe, a monster, I hurt people for fun, to feel something, anything other than what I felt all those years alone, growing up in that.. place. It changed me into something evil... I didn't recognize myself in the mirror until I met you, what we have is impossible but here we are... and I'm changing.. y-your changing me, I know I can be better, you are the light in my dark world Lilian."

He releases a shaky deep breath and puts his hand on his forehead, his eyes look bloodshot. "I swear to you Lilian, I will never harm you, ever. That chapter of my life is over, I want to forget and move on, make you the happiest woman alive, with our child, I want to do things to make you smile, not make you sad, so I'm being transparent and telling you the honest truth, I am at your mercy."

I try to wrap my head around what Demonia has just said and I can't. I simply cannot fathom the life he had, how he grew up to be that sort of man, to hurt because you were hurting, it's an unthinkable image I can't even picture, Demonia hurting someone for sexual pleasure.

Who hurts him this bad that he grew up this... this broken?

A lone tear falls from his eye and my heart clenches at the sight, I hold onto his hand and kiss his balled fist as he wipes the tear away with his other hand. "My mother."

He sighs shakily then smiles sadly at me, he moves a piece of wet hair away from my face then places his palm on my wet cheek. "You're so beautiful and kind, I do not deserve you, but I will prove to you every day that I love you, more than words and actions can say, that I do not doubt, you are the best thing to happen to me, I will prove my worth Lilian."

I hold onto his hand against my cheek and feel my eyes water from how broken he sounds, from how complicated his life was before the bond, it breaks my heart he had to be a monster to find love, but all he got was pain from pleasure, no wonder he is like the way he is, closed off and finding himself unworthy of love.

"I love you." I whisper out, staring into his eyes.

"You deserve to be loved Demonia.. and to be given a second chance, I.. you have me now and I won't ever hurt you, you're not a monster in my eyes. Thank you- f-for telling me this, I don't want us to hide anything from each other anymore."

He nods his head and wraps his arms around me and pulls me up with him until I wrap my arms around him, water drips from my legs and hair as he walks with me into the bedroom.

He places me down on the end of the bed and kneels in front of me, his head rests on my knees and his arms are around my waist. "I'll tell you anything and everything, all you have to do is ask and trust me." He says slowly, his voice breaking as he squeezes me tighter.

I comb through his wet hair with my fingers and massage his scalp comforting him. "We should get dressed, and eat... then, if you still want to, I will show my true self to you."

He pulls away from my knees and his beautiful eyes stare up at me. "Yeah, I would love that."