of sadness and goodbyes

know that my promise is still true,

i will protect you

even if it breaks me

as long as you will be

free

M A D D I E ♛

Apparently, Chase had another condition when he let me visit my fellow rogues. It was that he was going to come with me. But in all honesty, I think he's just afraid that I might escape again.

I was thinking about it, but then he said that he would be coming along.

I could sense that he was strong and I hated to admit it, maybe even stronger than me. But if he picks a fight with me, there was no way that I was going to let him win.

"If looks could kill, you would've killed me by now." Chase said all of a sudden as he walked ahead of me and I glared at his broad back.

We were walking towards the encampment of rogues, just the two of us. He claimed that no one will dare attack him within the vicinity of his pack and if a rogue does attack him, he would just need to kill them.

I know, talk about self-confidence right.

This guy was too sure of himself. And one thing I hated more about him, he was sure that he was going to make me stay.

"If only, unfortunately, staring alone won't kill you." I say.

We were almost there, about ten more minutes of walking. I could make up the barrier that I set over our camping ground.

Ah, how long has it been?

I missed the quiet of the forest. The forest was the only place I've ever known. It was my home, but it was also my battleground.

"Though I am curious, a group of rogues are sticking together? Chase started and glanced at me. When I didn't answer, he took it as a sign to continue. "There were rumours going on about a famous rogue. They call her... the Queen of the Rogues." he said. I made a mistake of meeting his eyes.

Queen of the Rogues huh?

"What are you trying to say?"

Chase smiled, carefree and annoying. "It makes me wonder if my mate is the one they call the Queen of the Rogues, see I'm very interested in knowing you, I'm hurt that you don't feel the same." he said again. My eyes widened.

So he did suspect that it was me.

I sighed and brought my claws out. He must've been surprised by what I did, but that didn't stay too long. He just smiled again, amused.

This guy is so annoying.

"You're crossing the line, pack wolf. And like I told you before, me being your mate doesn't mean anything." I reminded him, I made sure to add a bit of threat in my voice to scare him.But obviously, that didn't work because he just nodded and smiled, completely unfazed.

I sighed again and we continued walking until we reached the camping grounds.

As soon as we got nearer, I smelled the familiar scent of all the people that were there.

Ashley and her parents Mel and Steve. There was Mrs. Potters, Quinn and his two siblings Jenny and John. There was Gavin and Celeste. There was Gage and Leighton and everyone else.

I saw Andrew emerge out of the woods as he stood in front of the barrier that I set up. My heart melted at the sight of him. He looked like he hasn't slept in days, his chocolate eyes deep in thought, bags under his eyes and his hair disheveled.

I knew that everyone else was there, but they stayed hidden.

My heart was beating loudly, I didn't know how to face them. I didn't know how to tell them that I will be going in a pack. I felt like I was betraying them when I promised that I would be protecting them no matter what.

"Maddie." Andrew started, his voice washed off concern, but then his eyes turn to Chase who was now beside me and was watching everything.

I calmed myself before trying to speak.

I took a deep breath and tried to smile at him. We've been travelling for a year now and he was one of those I could consider as my friend that was the same age as me and to see him like this...

"Andrew, how have you all been?" I asked, still standing in place. He was about two meters away, he looked at me momentarily, but his eyes were still glued to Chase who had his eyebrow raised at Andrew.

"Not fine, we were all worried about you." he said.

I could feel the tension was getting worse between the two. I didn't understand what was wrong with Chase who seemed like a calm person and I don't know why Andrew is letting himself fall for his trap.

"Andrew, can you call everyone? Tell them it's fine to come out. I just... have something to tell everyone." I said. Finally, that took his whole attention and he turned to me.

His brows furrowed together for a bit, confused what I was about to tell them.

I knew that he must've been guessing that whatever it was, it wouldn't be good.

"Of course." he said and raised his hand. Within seconds, all the rogues that have been travelling with me showed. Everyone was there.

I saw Leighton who looked terrible, the cheerful and playful smile from his lips were gone and when our eyes met, tears filled his blue eyes.

Ah, he must've been blaming himself.

So, I smiled at him.

I could see that everyone was worried for me and that they all wanted to approach me. But then they look at Chase and they stay in place. They must've known and felt that he was a high-ranking pack wolf. As former pack wolves, the hierarchy still scared them.

I tried to smile at all of them, but seeing the younger rogues having tears in their eyes and the older ones have concerning looks, daggers sank in my heart.

"H-hey everyone. You must've been worried about me, I'm sorry for causing trouble. I wanted to let you all know that I am fine, I will be fine." I started. I took a deep breath before telling them. "The reason why I'm here is because I wanted to tell you that I won't be coming back anymore."

"Wh-what?! But Maddie--!" Gage said, but his tears have already fallen.

I walked nearer towards them. I looked back to Chase and their looks followed.

"Mel, remember when you were talking to me about mates? I didn't believe it then, but it must be true because that man seems to be my mate." I say. I could see that all of them were shocked. Mel and the other ladies covered their mouth in shock, they couldn't believe it.

"I will be staying in his pack, but don't worry. I will still keep my promise. I won't let any of you get hurt. All I ask is that you all stay here and everything will be--"

"How will things be fine if you aren't here Maddie?" Billy, one of the older men asked. I could see that he was devastated and worried.

"Even if I am not here with you, I am always watching over you. My mate has promised me that they will send men to protect you and they will send you provisions so you don't have to worry about that. My barrier will protect you, if there is anything wrong, I will come rushing right away. I'm not too far from you all." I explained lengthly.

They all stayed quiet, some in tears already. Some were clearly worried about their survival.

My heart broke.

I hated myself.

I broke my promise.

I betrayed them.

"In exchange, you have to stay with him, is that it?" Andrew said all of a sudden. I could see his fists clenching, his anger rolled off as he glared at Chase.

I walked towards him and held his hand. His eyes widened and I could feel him calming down. Slowly, he looked away from my mate and turned to me.

I held his cheek and smiled. "While I'm gone, I'm counting on you to protect everyone."

He stared deep into my eyes, trying to look for something, trying to look for a sign that I was asking for help. But I shook my head at him. I wanted him to know that I was fine...

"For you, Maddie. For you."

"Thank you, I will never forget this."

"Time's up." I hear Chase say and I was surprised when he was behind me and his hand held my arm.

The electric shock still surprised me and I was going to take my arm back because I didn't like how it felt, but his hold was firm.

I just noticed but he had a serious and cold look on his face. He was looking... dangerous.

And when did he say that there was a time limit?

Andrew didn't back down at the staring competition against Chase.

I sensed that if I didn't step in, they were going to start fighting so I backed off from Andrew.

"Everyone, I am sorry, but please know this. I am protecting you in the best way I can. I will try my best till the very end." I said and bowed to them.

"We will wait for you, Maddie."

"Yeah, we believe in you."

Everyone started saying their own inputs and small words of encouragements. In its own little way, that had made me smile and gave me a little hope.

I nodded. Chase looked at me again, he was still serious and gave me a warning look that we had to go. I rolled my eyes at him and said one last goodbye to the rogues.

With a heavy heart, I waved my hand, turned around started my steps away from everyone.

Only a few steps in and I hear Leighton's broken voice chasing after me. "Maddie, I'm so sorry!" he said and hugged me.

The gesture surprised me. I still wasn't used to hugging and all of the sort. I was only used to killings and fightings so gestures of affection were rare to me and as much as possible, I didn't do them.

But this time, I let Leighton embrace me. It was tight and earnest, begging me to not go.

I pat his hair, messing it up and made him to look at me. His blue eyes filled were filled with sadness and tears streamed down his tanned face.

"Leighton, I want you to know that nothing is your fault. I want you to grow stronger and protect everyone else. Will you do that for me?"

The young rogue nodded. I wiped the tears from his cheeks and with that, I turned around and walked away.

Goodbye.