Chapter 72

The princess tipped her head to the side, trying to remember. She’d been so concerned about Eli, nothing else had mattered. But then, everything rushed back to her, and her thoughts truly returned to Cassius for the first time since she’d learned Eli had arrived back at Wrenbrook. She wondered what Cassius might think of her if he’d been there to witness her emotional outburst. “I wanted to ask your permission to declare my first Rooming tonight at the ball.”

The queen arched one perfectly sculpted dark eyebrow. “Oh? And who, pray tell, do you wish to Room?”

Clearing her throat, Kit said, “I would like to ask Cassius from Warchester Keep to stay, my Queen, if you find him a suitable match.” She reminded herself that none of this was necessary, that her mother could tell her Cassius must go immediately, and there would be nothing the queen could do about the princess presenting him with a room, but seeing her mother’s smile light up her otherwise sullen face told Kit it was worth it to play the game as best she could, especially since her display in the hallway had won her no points.

“Yes, of course I approve. Cassius is a wonderful choice. He’s a fine looking young man with a delightful disposition. Warchester Keep is one of our wealthier provinces, and I’m sure they will be happy to support whatever endeavors the queendom sets forth should we need to call upon their people for resources beyond their usual contributions.”

Kit’s smile was genuine in that she was glad her mother approved of the first man she’d chosen to keep, but she paid careful attention to the rest of her mother’s words as well. It was obvious the queen preferred her to choose Representatives from the wealthier provinces. She meant to leverage their appointments in a similar manner to the method she’d used when offering admittance to Kit’s Exploration festivities to the highest bidder. In this case, there was no reason to fret because her mother’s plans went along with her own, but it would be problematic should she choose someone like Reeve, a Representative from a province without as much to offer.

“Thank you, Mother. When shall I make the announcement?”

“Let’s do it first thing. You can let the men know before we introduce the Representative from Eastbury. I do not wish to make a grand spectacle over a province who messed the situation up so thoroughly the first time.”

Kit nodded, not mentioning the fact that her mother had played a huge part in Eastbury’s previous failure, pushing for a candidate who was clearly not the one the people wanted or the best match for her. Still, it seemed to make more sense to Kit to reverse the order. “You do not wish the candidate from Eastbury to be aware I’ve already made a Rooming before he even begins the selection process?”

“No, something tells me he’ll know soon enough. Besides, you already have several favorites, don’t you? If you had to choose seven right now, I am sure you could. The candidate from Eastbury must know he is behind. I wouldn’t be too concerned with him, Katrinetta, if I were you.”

Her mother’s words were pointed, and something about the way her eyes narrowed when she spoke made Kit’s blood run cold. She certainly wouldn’t be able to choose six other men right now, not if she wanted to do her due diligence. And the candidate from Eastbury had just as good a chance as any of the others, besides Cassius, of course, who had a leg up on everyone, even Reeve, but her mother’s eyes were a warning, and Kit murmured, “Yes, Mother. Whatever you say, Your Majesty.”

“Good. I’m glad to hear that.” But her face didn’t reflect the emotion in her words any more than Kit felt as if she truly wouldn’t give the candidate from Eastbury the opportunity to show her he was worthy. She already had an idea of him in her mind, this farmhand who was Jecob’s finest competition, assuming that’s who Eli had brought back with him, and the last thing she wanted to do was dismiss the man before they’d even met.

“Now, Katrinetta, I suggest you take your time walking back to your chambers. Right yourself, fix your hair, and show up for the ball looking presentable. And if I ever hear or see you acting like a wild animal again, you can be sure I’ll do whatever I must to tame you. Do not expect me to be so merciful the next time you or your little friend step out of line. Am I clear?”

Kit’s knees trembled beneath her gown. She should’ve known the woman before her had been far too pleasant to be sincere. “Yes, my Queen,” she replied, curtsying as low as she could manage in her elaborate gown and shoes.

“That is all.” The queen flicked her away with a wrist, and Kit started the painful process of backing toward the door with feet that felt as if she’d run across shards of glass barefooted.

Once Kit reached the hallway, she was relieved to see only Galter there, other than her mother’s men. None of her other guards who had witnessed her outburst stayed. He wore a sympathetic smile and offered one arm, the other tucked behind his back. Kit gladly accepted his arm, wondering how in the world she would ever make it through a ball when she could hardly even walk.

Once they rounded the corner, Galter paused and produced a pair of satin silver slippers. “Your ladies thought these might also match your gown.”

“Oh, Galter! You’re a lifesaver!” Kit exclaimed, though she was careful not to be too loud for fear her mother would show up again. She carefully worked her throbbing feet out of the heels and gratefully let him help her into the slippers. Though her feet still ached, it was much better, and she was able to put her full weight down with each step without wincing.

Galter carried her shoes in his hand, and she continued to lean on his arm a bit as they walked. She could tell there was something he wanted to say, but she didn’t want to hear it. If it was important enough, she decided he would say it whether she invited him to or not.

They were almost to her room before he finally cleared his voice and said, “My Princess, the next time you feel as if the world is crumbling around you, please feel free to ask for assistance. I cannot help you when I do not know the cause of your pain, but if I had known, perhaps I could’ve saved you some agony.”

Kit turned to look at him, realizing what he was saying was true, at least the first part. She should’ve taken the time to explain herself to him and to her ladies. “Did you know?”

“I knew nothing about what has transpired, my Princess, and I still don’t. But that doesn’t mean I couldn’t have served you better if you’d paused to tell me.” Kit nodded in understanding, and Galter took a step closer to her. Leaning in by her ear, he whispered, “My loyalty is to you above all others, Princess Katrinetta. You must know that. I can assure you, the rest of your guards feel the same.” He raised his head, looked her directly in the eye, gave a sharp nod, and then turned to continue their journey.

Kit ignored the churning in her stomach. If she acknowledged it, then she’d have to admit there was more to this situation than she was willing to recognize presently. In order for Galter to be on her side, there would have to be an opposite side. And admitting that there was hostility would mean she’d have to face the realization that the one person in the world who should’ve always been in her corner may actually be the one who most wanted to see her fail. After all she’d been through in the last hour or so, she couldn’t possibly accept the notion that before this was all over, she might have to face off against the most powerful queen in Yewforian history. For now, she’d focus on the fact that her mother had been willing to put Kit’s indiscretion with Eli aside without making a spectacle or meting out a punishment.

Reaching her room, Kit took a deep breath and pushed through the door. She would have to find a way to move past this as well. As enchanting as the kiss she’d shared with Eli had been, it was only a fantasy. He could never be hers, and she would have to find a way to experience the same emotion with someone else. At least, she’d always have the memory of his lips on hers, and no matter what anyone said or did, that was something her mother could never take away.

But now, forty-two gentlemen waited for her. One had completed the first steps in his journey and was about to embark on a new adventure as her first Rooming. One had opened his heart and bared his scars. One was hiding behind a façade Kit wished to tear aside, perhaps that very night, and one was about to learn that despite the fanfare and legacy of a princess’s Choosing, this tradition was as full of heartache, grief, and shattered dreams as it was of beauty, love, and pleasure. In the back of her mind, she still had the idea that, if there was a way for her to make it to the end and keep every one of the men she was developing feelings for, then she’d have to find away. The last thing in the world she’d ever want to do was to break so many hearts especially not the hearts of those men she could tell were already falling for her as quickly as she was falling for them.