Chapter 21 Humairah

People like Sarah, Mubarak, and Faisal thought Ahmad was in love with me but they were so badly wrong. When Naziha disappeared from the house few weeks back I was always around Ahmad – making him feel safe, cracking jokes, telling him stories, watching films with him, dining outside with him and even going out to search for Naziha, but he never talked about love with me. He never tried to touch me, he never looked at me affectionately, he was always talking about Naziha and he never stopped until she literarily returned back.

Ahmad was so happy to see Naziha when she came back, he boldly hugged and kissed her in our presence. He didn't even ask her where she went to and why, he was so happy to see her back. Like seriously? My own Ahmad? The Ahmad I was always around him? Well, that was enough for me. Do you even know what? There was a time he told me he was the horny type and so he couldn't stay long without sex. I wanted telling him I was also a horny type too and could not stay a whole week without masturbating myself but then I changed my mind.

When Ahmad told me about his condition, I had wanted making myself available to him but then something told me not to and it was my conscience. So I dropped the evil idea and focused on making him feel like someone really cared. Yesterday, he went out early and I thought he would come back and take me home like he used to do but unfortunately he didn't. It was Faisal that volunteered. I didn't have a good sleep, I had rolled from one side of the bed to another with his thoughts lingering in my mind.

I loved Ahmad, I should have made myself available to him while I had the chance and maybe the child I would conceive for him would have united us both but I was too scared to do that. What if he dump me later like other men used to do after getting what they want? What if all he had for me was infatuation? What if he was only using me to bar his loneliness? What if Naziha would always be his? What if...? My mind wasn't at rest at all, I couldn't stop asking myself questions that I knew I had no answers to. I really loved Ahmad and I needed him!

Today, Sarah called me as early as possible and told me she had been trying Ahmad's number to tell him she wouldn't be able to make it to work due to her troublesome pregnancy that had been taking its toll on her but then his phone wasn't reachable. "Please as soon as you reach Oga (boss') house, endeavor to tell him everything" She had implored and I told her not to worry. Ahmad was the kind of boss that never reduce salary or scold just because you are sick or took a day off. He was very kind.

While waiting for Faisal to come and pick me up, I held my earpieces to my ears and began listening to "Right Now" by Seyi Shay. It wasn't cold today so I wasn't wearing my sweater. I was wearing the ankara I came to the city with. It was my best in the village but here, you know what to call it. Nothing in the village can be compared to that of the city, everything was perfect here. Water was always in your house, electricity was stable, storey buildings everywhere, fancy cars, medical facilities, etc!

🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶

When i close my eyes

And i think of the memory

Me and you, you and me

You used to looove me

You used to looove me

And baby i will ride for you

Flow wine for you

I will touch my tippy toes

I will bounce it for you

Oh, ohhh... all the things you used to dooo!

I still remember back in December

Was the hotest winter

From the sunrise to midnight

The love dey enter

That is why I surrender

There is no contender

From the midnight to sunrise

The love dey enter!

Touch me now now

Right now now now now!

Do you remember the rhyme

Cus I remember the rhyme

I wanna feel it right now now now now!

Tou ou ou ch me me me now now now

Right now now now now!

Do you remember the rhyme

I wanna join in the ryhme

Me want me feel it right now now now now

Right now now now

Now now now now!

🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶

As soon as Faisal arrived with the car, I paused the song and quickly hopped into the car. He was so late today, 7 O'clock but I didn't complain because what was in my mind was heavier than anything at that moment. I greeted him and just as I was about playing the song he said something that baffled me.

"Something happened between Oga (boss) and his wife yesterday, he drove out of the house in extreme anger" He said as he began driving.

"What do you mean?" I puzzled.

"Well, I was in our lodge when I heard him yelling at Mubarak to open the gate for him. The way he spoke told me something was wrong. I quickly rushed out and saw madam begging him in the parking lot not to go but he was furious. He reversed back and drove out like a maniac. Maybe something happened between him and madam or maybe he divorced her because throughout the night Mubarak and I were helping her pack her things out of the house. She summoned a trailer early this morning and off she went with all her things" Faisal elaborated everything bit by bit to me.

"What?!" I dropped my jaw. "And where is Ahmad?" I queried hoping that nothing bad happened to him. He was the only one I cared about, nothing was my business with Naziha. Her leaving would even pave a way for me into Ahmad's heart, so why should I even worry about her? I certainly disliked her!

"Wallahi we've been trying his number but we couldn't reach him..." He said in a sad tone.

"Take me to Brimstone!" I ordered.

"What?" He turned and gave me a baffled gaze. "What on earth are you going to do there?"

"Just take me there!" I gulped and continued. "If there is any place Ahmad would likely be at this moment then it has to be there" I added.

"That place is a very bad place, don't tell me you've been there with him before" He jealously said.

"That's none of your business, just take me there. By the way not every bad place is dominated by bad people and a hotel is a hotel, it only depends on what took you there or what you did there" I said.

"Okay" He said and huffed.

"Whatever you have in your mind, just say it!" I squealed.

"Nothing, is just that..." He paused.

"I am listening, Faisal" I said.

"Well, the thing is... uhmm, I will tell you some other time, I promise" He changed his mind.

"It better not be what I'm thinking" I said.

"What's that?" He asked.

"Love!" I said.

"Oh my God, Humairah! Why do you expect everybody to love you? Just because Mubarak once used to call you my girlfriend doesn't mean I have feelings for you" He smirked.

"Right?" I giggled and continued. "The more you deny it the more you hurt yourself, Mr Man"

"Okay... okay, I love you!" He cleared his throat and continued. "Are you now satisfied? Crazy teenager!" He said laughing at himself, yes... not me!

"Sadly, I will never be yours" I giggled.

"Whatever!" He said.

Brimstone was Ahmad's favourite dining place, it was a remarkable hotel located just after the State Government house. I never knew there was such a place in this present life until he took me there to quench his loneliness. We've been there more than 5 times, just to dine and have some fun. He wanted to feel cared and I was the perfect soulmate.

As soon as Faisal pulled over in front of the hotel's gate, I told him to wait for me to go and check inside. There was a place Ahmad loved staying in, it was the elegant bar. If I didn't see him there then that means he lodged a room.

"Don't stay long, I haven't eaten breakfast" Faisal complained wearing a pathetic face.

"And why should I stay long?" I hissed at him.

"It's a big place, you know" He said.

"Oh, now I get it! I will be right back" I said and left him.

Just as I was in the hotel, the first place I checked was the parking lots – none of which housed Ahmad's car. So I proceeded  to the bar but he wasn't there too, hence I went to the receptionist with a smile. "Please I am looking for someone by the name Ahmad Jaafar Zaki, do you..."

"What are you doing here, Humairah?" A husky voice from my back intercepted me, I didn't even know when I turned to the person. It was Ahmad and he was obviously drunk.

"What the hell?!" I quickly collected the beer he was holding and dropped it onto a table, I was heartbroken because I never knew he was a drunkard. "We have to go home sir!" I said getting hold of him.

"Oh come on, Humairah!" He gently pushed me away and took his beer. "This is just life and, it's gonna end soon so let's enjoy while we can!"

"No!" I collected the beer from him again and returned it to the table. "Please let's just go, sir"

"Okay... okay, but let me get my ATM card. It's... It's in the room I lodged, number 34" He belched.

"Okay, stay right here sir. Let me go and get it for you" I said and quickly ran to the elevator.

Immediately I was in the room the first place I checked was the bedside drawers, it wasn't there so I took off the blanket and just then the ATM card fell on the floor. I smiled about picking it up when Ahmad stormed in. I had told him to wait for me outside but he was the stubborn type. I took the ATM card and walked over to him. "Here, let's go" I said about walking him out when he held my arm firmly.

"She cheated on me" He said.

"Who?" I puzzled.

"Naziha, she slept with someone" He said.

"What?" My heart began beating so very fast, was that what her wandering all about? How dared she do that to him? Was she insane? "But why?" I asked him.

"It's a long story Humairah, but now I am going to cheat on her too" He said in tears.

"What do you mean?" I puzzled.

"I am sorry Humairah, but I have to sleep with you" He said and before I knew it he lifted me up and took me to the bed. I didn't say anything, if that was what he wanted then he had gotten it. But I was scared, I was a masturbator not a fornicator. Was I doing the right thing?

"Wait Ahmad, please just wait!" I squealed.

"What?" He said as he stopped unbuckling his belt. "You promised to be there for me"

"Yes, but this isn't good sir!" I said.

"But I have to, I really need to!" He said.

"Okay, but not with me" I said feeling the paces of my tears down to my ears. I was so scared.

"Humairah, look..." He said as I cut in.

"Please sir, let's just go home" I pleaded.

Just then, he huffed and withdrew from me. "I am sorry" He said while adjusting his belt.

"You don't need to be sorry" I managed to say as I withdrew from the bed and held his hand with a bitter smile. "Let's go home, sir"

"Okay" He said

We walked out of the hotel together, I thought he had parked his car somewhere around but he told me his car was hijacked by some thugs when he angrily left the house in the night. I really felt sorry for him, everything happened because of Naziha. He loved her so very much but she broke his heart and soul.

I had wanted allowing him to have me but I changed my mind the moment I saw him about to do it. I was so scared and wasn't ready for it. I knew he wasn't in his full senses and I knew he would eventually regret ever doing it.

He never said he loved me, he only wanted me to be around him and to help him out of every difficulty. If he had said that he loved me, maybe because of that love I would have let him have me. But what if he had me at that moment? Perhaps he might end up dumping me and my dream of becoming his wife would have ended prematurely.

We both went out to Faisal who was waiting for us in the car and thus we hopped into the back seat. It was a silent ride home, Ahmad vomited almost all the bad stuffs he took in the hotel. After that I cooked breakfast and he ate and slept.

While cleaning the mess he threw up, I imagined how perfect it would be for me to be his wife. Like, he understood me and I also understood him but why wasn't he thinking about marriage? Why couldn't he just make me his second wife?