FOWL MOOD

I am leaving my beautiful home, but I will return. I will not say soon or when exactly, but I surely will. I will not just return alone, but next time I visit, hopefully, I will have news about my father, and Grace too will be with me. Hopefully, because that brat is such a hardcore. Hope is all I have, all I am carrying, and I am not letting go of it.

I drag my unwilling, lazy self to the car where Deep is waiting and hop in. This foul mood between us is killing me. But what can I do to help if I am the problem? I see him, and I remember that passionate night. The electric jolts of his soft touch on my bare skin are yet to vanish. I look at him, and I remember how childishly I acted yesterday morning. My jealousy and outbursts are not in any way justified. I know I have no right to ask him anything, even if I run into him with another woman this very minute. I allowed everything that happened. I did not ask questions before, and I shouldn't do it now. I don't know why my mind can't explain this to my heart, because it seems like my heart was expecting something else after that act. Funny, right? But can we curb feelings?

I have heard and read things about one-night stands and blind dates. Is this what they feel after the deed is done? Maybe I should try, but, naah! That, I can't handle. I can't imagine myself in bed with a stranger who I have never met and will probably never meet again. I know what you are thinking, but my case is different. My deep is no stranger. I might be feeling this way about him; he might be an annoying jerk at times, and I might be fuming mad at him right now, but I still believe that we have a long way to go. Especially if I can manage to keep my emotions at bay. I need lessons on that. I will make Google my friend when I get to the city, and how to overcome unwarranted jealousy will be my daily subject. I need to overcome this.

The drive is quiet; not even a song is playing in the stereo to ease the boredom. I miss that time we drove around Mombasa with my songs playing in his vehicle and both of us singing like two beautiful, crazy strangers, because that is exactly what we were back then—two crazy strangers. It was our second time to meet, but we were so free and open to each other, like we knew each other the whole of our lives. We sang, we talked, we laughed our lungs out, and we poured all our sorrows on each other. We ate, we drank, and we finally ended up in his house. And on that night, after we had nothing to talk about anymore, we shared our second kiss. A beautiful kiss on his couch, and in the morning, I woke up to the most beautiful sight of him beside me on his bed. I felt like I was an angel, having shared a night with a Greek god and still waking up untouched. My! That felt like pure walking on air. I respected him a lot. I mean, huh, men devour anything in a skirt that their eyes catch sight of. But he proved me wrong. A sweet, composed gentleman.

I have been wishing for a morning like that again, but now that it happened, I ruined it all. I stare at him through the corner of my eye. My Deep is beside me, composed and smoking hot like always. But that one thing that I love the most is missing. That one thing makes his handsome face shine like a morning star. The smile. There is no trace of it. It's like he has forgotten how to smile, and that is unlike my deep. He could have smiled countless times right now if things were okay between us. I miss the sweet sound of his laughter, even just a chuckle. He can be an annoying jerk for all I care, but not like this. It's killing me.

My phone buzzes in my jacket—actually, his jacket, which I am wearing—and I fish it out. We at least have a distraction after ages. We still have more than one and a half hours to drive, and it feels like a whole annoying day ahead. "Sharyl, hi!" I receive the phone, trying to sound as convincingly lively as I can because I don't want her to notice that I am not in the mood.

"Hi, Gia! Are you guys on the way already?" She asks, and I can hear some chitchat from her side. I think the girls are adjusting pretty well.

"Yes. I am. We are on the way back. Is there a problem?" I ask.

"Girl, you worry too much. Relax! Everything is fine. I just wanted to know if you will make it here tomorrow." She says that, and that puts me at ease.

"Sure. Of course I will come." I assure her.

"That's good. We will see you tomorrow, then. The girls have a little surprise for you." She says.

"Surprise? What kind of surprise?" I frown. Not that I hate surprises, but I just don't want the girls to feel indebted to me. They did not bother at all.

"Sorry, they will kill me if I spill the beans." She says.

"Alright. But they shouldn't trouble themselves. You too, because I know you are part of it." I scolded her.

"We can't help it." She says.

"Okay. See you tomorrow then, and say hi to the girls for me." I say.

"Alright. Take care and kiss Mr. Handsome for me, will you?"

What? See this one!

"Huh? Why a kiss? Why would you want to kiss him?" I snap.

"Huhuu, possessive, huh? Just give him a hi-five then." She says.

Well, that is better! Too bad. We are at odds here, so most likely her greetings will just remain with me. "Whatever. Bye!" I hang up and put the phone back in my pocket, the frown covering my face again. Kiss my foot! Deep doesn't even want to look at me. How can I give him even just a peck? Why should I kiss him on her behalf anyway? She has a man of her own to kiss all she wants. She is just...

"Ouch!" What the heck! If I didn't have a safety belt on, I would have banged my head on the windscreen and perhaps have it in two pieces now. Jeez! Why does he have to pull up so savagely like a beast? Why are we even stopping? I turn to him, and there he is, his face straight and relaxed, like he did not do anything.

"What's wrong?" I ask softly, and he turns to me.

First, I don't like the expression on his face. It's so worryingly flat. Second, his eyes look darker than usual—dark with anger. He is fuming inside. I can tell that for sure. I am not the one who banged his baby on the road, right? He is the one behind the wheel, so why is he looking at me like this?

"You tell me, Gia." He finally deems it right to speak to me after browsing my face.

Me? What did I do now? Did I say anything wrong on the phone about him? No, as far as I can remember. "I don't get you," I say to let him know that I don't quite understand him. Just what did I do?