Chapter 15

The kiss had made me realise so many things. There were so many feelings racing through me and his hands wrapped around me wasn't helping. What was this feeling?

He pulled back and rested his forehead against mine.

What does this mean?

Does he like me?

Was this a mistake?

All those thoughts ran through me, making me scared of what he'll say next.

"A friend can kiss another friend to help you know. This does not mean anything Lily," he whispered.

Ouch!

"I was sad, kisses are one of the many ways to comfort a friend, nothing is changing Lily," he whispered. That kiss meant nothing to him, it was just a comfort tactic.

It hurts and I can't help it. Have you ever had this kind of feeling where your chest tightens and you can't help but cringe? That's how I'm feeling.

This is so strange, why do I feel this way? Why was I hurt that it meant nothing to him? Why did I kiss back? What was this feeling about? Why was my heart throbbing in my chest?

I smiled, "Yeah... it doesn't change anything," I tried to ignore the beating of my heart and this new feeling I haven't figured out yet.

"Thank you, Lily," he smiled.

"Now that you know about me, can I ask something about you?" He expected, stepping away a bit.

"Uhmm," I hummed.

"Your parents are rarely around, why?" He asked.

If only he knew what I'm going through right now.

"Not now, one reveal is enough for today," I said.

"Fine, but you owe me. No backing out," he chuckles.

I smile weakly, "Ok," I replied.

"Goodnight," he said and left through the window as usual. I locked my window after him and collapsed on my bed, letting the tears fall freely. What kind of pain is this?

Maybe Juli can help. I don't wanna do it over the phone, but if I call her now, she'd be sure to come even if it's late. I text and tell her I need to speak to her tomorrow. She replied saying she was already planning on coming home.

The next day came sooner than expected. I didn't want to go to school or see Ric. That feeling still lingered.

Suddenly my door slams open. "OMG! Lily what happened to you?!" Juliana asked worriedly while pulling me in for a hug. That's for texting her in the middle of the night.

Juliana doesn't mind leaving in the middle of the night to assure the safety of her loved ones. I wouldn't trade her for anything. I hugged her back. I miss her hugs, she gives the best hug.

"Juli," I whine like a baby.

"What's wrong, Lily? Come on, tell me," she demands.

"I promise I will when I come back from school, I'm already late," I tell her and she nods her head. She offered Dennis and me a ride to school.

Dennis kept talking about school and— can you believe it— his girlfriend. My brother has a girlfriend already and we've only been here for two months. He said she said yes to him last night.

Juli kept teasing me about not getting a boyfriend.

Today wasn't great. Neither I nor Ric could talk without acting awkward around each other.

My eyes lingered on his lips and yesterday's memory came flooding back. My unsteady and rapid heartbeat when I'm close to him. The way my heart squeals with joy and how I suddenly want him close is strange.

What is happening to me? I started to stare at him more. Admiring his creme blonde hair, his pink heart shaped lips, his broad shoulders— arghhh!

When I got back home, I could smell something delicious in the kitchen. Trust Juli to cook when she's around. I miss her food.

"That smells nice, what are you cooking?" I asked.

"Porridge yam." She grins.

She drops her cooking spoon on the counter before turning to me.

"So tell me, Lily, what's been bothering you?" She smirks.

I sigh, "Juli, something strange is happening to me," I begin.

I begin to tell her about Ric and me and how that sudden kiss is making me feel different. The way I see him has changed. My heart beats erratically when I look at him, especially his lips. Juliana laughed and that made me frown. What was so funny.

"My baby sis has a crush," she cooed. Crush? I'm crushing on Ricardo? How?

"It's simple, opposites attract?" She raises her brows.

"Liliana Rose, you're starting to like... what's his name?"

I shake my head, refusing to tell her.

"Okay, you like that boy. Trust me, I know that feeling. You want him close, you want his hugs and kisses, you feel warm around him." She said.

"I can't believe this! Finally my sister has a love interest!" She jumps in excitement.

Too bad she doesn't know about everything.

"Do you think he feels the same... I..." I stuttered.

"He definitely does. Why else would he kiss you?"

"He said that the kiss was another way of comforting a friend," I told her, pissed. "He was in a vulnerable state Juli, which means it does not count!"

I was angry with the fact that whatever I was going through, he might not be going through the same.

"Tsk tsk tsk," Juli clicks her tongue. "If only you knew more about romance, you'd get what I mean." Juli said.

"You have a crush on him and it's your duty to find out if he feels the same." She informs me.

"And plus, it would be his loss to not crush on my beautiful, adoring, sweet, little sis, don't you think?" She coos.

"Come give little momma a hug," she tells me and I do so.

I love my sis so much.