Chapter 4

Oh goddess! Her scent is driving me crazy. Her long black hair and silver blue eyes are more than my head can understand. Bane is howling, jumping and clawing within me in excitement at just the sight of her. Not to mention her just walking around in the hallway. Her scent is making our mind hazy and without coordination.

The sight of her clothing made me feel lustful and wanting towards her. And it wasn’t like she was wearing anything special, just one of Magda’s old t-shirts and a pair of shorts. She was breathtakingly beautiful. Shaking my thoughts from my head, I questioned… what is happening to me?

If I didn’t know any better, I would swear she was my mate. But I already had mine. Goddess I can’t think straight when she’s nearby. HELP ME PLEASE!! I am stronger than this. I am an Alpha of a strong and powerful pack. I cannot and will not fall apart over a woman. I say this over and over again trying to convince myself of these words. However, it is not working very well though.

I managed to stammer out, hoping it wasn’t noticeable. I was having a hard time controlling myself around her “what is your name?” I asked with a strength that did not let on I was falling apart inside.

Her name. Is. Timber. I heard her say in the slightest of whispers. Thank the Goddess for wolf hearing. Even the sound of her voice and name is intoxicating to my ears. Bane howls again and whimpers, to be able to hold her. Caress her. Smell her. Feel her close.

“Are you feeling better?” I ask all nonchalantly. Like her very presence is not bothering me. When in contrast it was driving me mad crazy with desire.

“I’m feeling much better. Thank you Alpha.” Her eyes never looked directly at mine. She seems nervous. Afraid even.

‘What did they do to her? I’m going to tear them apart!’ Bane says. ‘Relax Bane all in due time.’ Trying to relax him before he tries to gain control with anger. With lust. With wanting. I closed my eyes just for a brief moment, slightly longer than a blink in order to keep full control.

Just the thought of someone punishing her. Abusing her. Hurting her… made him angry and hurt. He tried to take over so he could hold her and keep her safe from all harm. Clawing at my insides for release. But he backed down when I told him it was not appropriate, or the time.

As calm and authoritatively as I could I stammered out “You will start training with the rest of the pack starting tomorrow in your human form. This is Beta Andrew, you have already met him, and he will oversee you. If you need anything you come to me directly. If I am not available, you see Andrew. Do you understand?” I said as I barely lifted my eyes up to look at her from my desk again. Just looking at her made me crazy.

I tried to focus on the paperwork in front of me as I refused to make any more eye contact with her. Half reading this one, partially reading that one. I’m going to have to go back over these when she leaves. I am sure of it. I have no idea what I just signed. I sighed mentally.

“Yes Alpha.” She said in a timid and confused voice. After a brief moment of silence, she broke it stuttering out “I d-do not, wa-want to be dis-respectful Alpha, b- but why am I to tr-train? I have only worked taking care of pack needs. I’ve never trained before?”

‘She’s never trained before!?! All members of my pack train! No wonder her old pack is useless to defend themselves. They do not utilize all their members equally or responsibly.’

Disgusted with what I just heard, I hit the desk with my fist and barked out “All members of this pack trains. That. Includes you. Do you? Understand?” I was trying not to say this demeaning, but I was taken back that she’s never trained before. What was she? The pack… dog? I was furious.

“Yes Alpha. Thank you Alpha.” She said with obedience. In shock she started to look up at me to only quickly shy away as if she remembered her place and went to it.

Admiration and respect fell over me with that one comment and action. She said it with such gratitude. Like she was waiting for me to exile her or throw her in the dungeon cells. I nodded to Andrew and she left my office with him. Once the door shut, I released a heavy sigh and closed my eyes.

~ Timber POV

When I awoke from my pain staking black out in the garden, I was in a room. It was a beautiful room. Bright and full of life. There must be some mistake. I’m not worthy to be in a room like this. I’ve never been in a room like this. The bed was a canopy queen size bed with lavender and light blue covers. There was also a white chiffon draping hanging over the top and neatly tied to each of the four bed posts. The bathroom was just inside and right of the main door and there was, what looked like a walk-in closet next to it.

There was also a pale white armour with matching dresser and side tables. The translucent blue curtains lightly covered the bay window looking out over the back of the house. Above me was a beautiful 19 century ceiling fan with hand painted light fixtures perfectly set in fours. It was magnificent.

My pain had subsided and the fire I felt was gone now too. Thank goddess for that because I thought I was burning from the inside out. Magda must’ve changed my clothes because I was now wearing a pale green t-shirt and shorts. I was finishing the meal Magda had brought me when Andrew came knocking on the door saying that the Alpha wanted me in his office now. I looked at Magda worried.

Saying I was afraid was not exactly the extent of the feeling I had right now. Nervously and apprehensively of what I did wrong, I followed him. He probably didn’t want such a weak and broken member in his pack. Better not get used to this room. Attic, dungeon, or exile. Here I come. Again.

The closer we got to the Alpha’s office the stronger that scent became I smelled earlier. Karin was calm and it brought the feeling of serenity and love to me just by smelling it. She whimpered in anticipation of being engulfed by it.

Sitting at the desk was Alpha Johnathon and there was the over consuming scent! I could barely breathe or see. Let alone think or speak. Keep your head down. Do. Not. Make eye contact!

“What is your name?” He finally said after staring at me for what seemed like forever. Or Eternity. Whichever is longer. “Timber” I said, almost a whisper, still not looking directly at him. I was nervous and afraid of what this meeting was about.

“Are you feeling better?” he said. As though he genuinely was concerned for me, but that cannot be. He just wanted to make sure his member was able to go back to work. Work! I forgot about the garden. This must be what he called me in here for. Fear took over my body and I shook slightly.

I left it without finishing my work. Starting to feel a little panicky to why he was pulling my punishment out. Is this to taunt me? Or make me squirm? Maybe it was so I knew my place and he was humoring me in a sadistic, ‘let ‘em think you’re nice, then tear ‘em apart kind of torture’.

My heart was beating so fast I swear everyone in the whole house could hear its pounding inside my chest. “Much better. Thank you Alpha.” Was all I could stutter out nervously. Never looking directly at him. Please don’t let him think I’m being disrespectful. Wass all I could say repeatedly to myself.

I was so nervous I’m sure he could tell. Especially with all the shaking I’m doing. I’ve been told my scent stinks, especially when I’m nervous or scared. I have learned over the years to not look into anyone’s face. The one time I did, I was being rejected by my mate. Then hit in the face for looking at him with the back of his fist.

Tears tried to form in my eyes, but I pushed them back down. I especially don’t look at anyone who’s of importance or of power like the Alpha. Or Beta. Or General. Or even Warriors. Pretty much anyone else who is thought of better than me. Which seemed to be… well everyone.

Without further hesitation Alpha Johnathon said, “You will start training with the rest of the pack starting tomorrow in your human form. This is Beta Andrew, you have already met him, and he will oversee you. If you need anything you come to me directly. If I am not available, you see Andrew. Do you understand?”

There was a directness and sternness in the way he said this. I stood there with obedience and shock that he would actually want me to train. Forgetting myself I started to look up at him but quickly remembered my place and lowered my eyes again. “Yes Alpha.” I said not sure why he would want me of all people to train.

Mustering up the little bit of courage I did have I stuttered out “I d-do not, wa-want to be dis-respectful Alpha, b-but why am I to tr-train? I have only worked taking care of pack needs. I’ve ne-ever trained be-fore?” All the while praying to the Moon Goddess he won’t retaliate and beat me for my disrespect in questioning his motives.

With a discerned look on his face he said, “All members of this pack trains. That. Includes you. Do you? Understand?” I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding as he commanded back. He was annoyed with me. It was evident as he said this with disapproval. I flinched at his growled command. Yet still held back my tears.

I wanted to crawl in my bed and cry. My heart pounded like a bass drum heavy and hard with fear. I hope I don’t anger him more. This pack is not known for their kindness or compassion. With obedience I said. “Yes Alpha. Thank you Alpha.” With that he nodded to Beta Andrew and we left his office.