93

He was standing right in front of me, so close his breath brushed my cheek and yet he seemed far away.

His deep, brown eyes no longer only reflected the darkness that frightened me, but also the pure desperation and the associated weakness on his part, which for me had something of a strength that he himself did not recognize.

He was certainly a man who was of the opinion that he shouldn't show himself like that, but I immediately understood how much courage and overcoming it took him and that's exactly why he made himself into a man for me whose strength is not only recognizable in in his dominant charisma, but also deep inside him.

"Maybe I can help," I breathed, speaking very quietly, afraid I might spoil this moment of revelation. I wanted to be there for him and not because I was a therapist. This with him standing in front of me was something completely different. I didn't see him as a patient, but as someone who touched my heart in a way no one had ever done before.

My feelings, too, seemed to get the best of me, for where I was usually very composed in such emotional outpourings, his words drew a single tear from my eyes, which ran warmly down my flushed cheek.

I didn't even want to imagine what he meant about his father being some kind of devil, because I couldn't live with the idea that someone had done something bad to Emilio, even if to the rest of the people here he was the bad guy in the story seemed to be. It wasn't like that for me...

Plus his sister... Autism... A condition that was very difficult to understand. She certainly had routines that she was used to on a daily basis and the fact that such people usually needed a firm anchor made it all the more difficult for Emilio to approach her.

"You can't help," Emilio suddenly said into the silence and broke his gaze from mine, only to turn his back to me.

I gave him his space and accepted that he needed time to process everything. It was enough for me for the moment that it had opened and I would wait.

Waiting for him to accept my help, even though I didn't really know how to help at all...

"Maybe we should eat something and I'm sorry to say that now, but I have to go to my apartment urgently today," I explained and he immediately turned around with a stunned look, making him wide-eyed eyed.

There it was again... the darkness that at times seemed endless.

"No way! You stay here and there is nothing to discuss!"

He gave me a warning look, and while I was concerned at how quickly his mood could change, it wasn't surprising to me when I thought about his father. Surely he didn't teach him how to keep feelings and emotions under control and it was also Emilio's only way to defend himself by simply making decisions instead of discussing it rationally.

But not with me. I would show him that it was okay to give in...

"Oh yes, we're discussing it, because I have patients and I have to start work next week! I can't let everything slide. I already have hardly any money to-"

"How much do you need?" he cut me off immediately, running a hand through his black hair before pulling his wallet out of his pocket and pulling out so many bills that I briefly gasped at the extent of his wealth.

Which person had the annual salary of a therapist in his pocket just like that?

But I quickly shook my head and pushed the money he held out to me back to him.

"That's out of the question. I have my own money."

"You just said you had hardly any money," he suddenly grinned triumphantly and while I stared at him completely perplexed, he simply grabbed the waistband of my sweatpants and stuck the bills between my skin and the waistband, so that I got goosebumps on my arms .

But not because of all the money, but because of him and the way he looks at me.

He watched closely as I parted my lips slightly, and although I felt fleetingly like a prostitute, a heat shot through me that I could barely stand. It was as if he had to hold himself back, his gaze became so intense and his eyes so dark. I was amazed at how much he seemed to want me.

"Kiss me," I suddenly blurted out and I put my hands over my mouth in shock, because no one had expected that.

What the hell was wrong with me!?

My eyes darted over his face with red cheeks and I was ashamed of my words, which seemed to please him more than just.

The darkness was forgotten. All the problems were forgotten. Only the here and now counted while the tension between us was almost unbearable and palpable.

Very slowly, I took my hands from my lips and watched him examining my lips with bated breath until I bit my bottom lip and he pinned my hip against the kitchen counter behind me.

"You're provoking me," he whispered dangerously close to my cheek, pressing his body so tightly against mine that I could already feel his arousal on my abdomen. It was so new to me and yet, there was pure trust between us. I knew that I was in good hands with him and if everything in my life was already sinking into chaos anyway, why not just enjoy and take what you needed at such a moment.

I carefully wrapped my arms around his neck and looked up at him shyly while he gave a barely noticeable grin and started to run his hands over my bottom.

"I said you should kiss me, don't you?" I asked again with a provocative smile and I could hardly breathe, his lips were on mine so quickly and the butterflies in my stomach could hardly be tamed .

His taste was delicious and I sucked on his lips eagerly for more as he easily lifted me by my butt onto the counter to stand between my legs forcibly.

It happened fast, maybe too fast, but maybe it was just what we both needed right now... I didn't know it, but I've never been more certain of a man's deserving of my virginity...

He would be tender to me... at least I hoped so...