Chapter 38

LEILANI.

I stared out of the window and saw him. A smile lit up my face, brightening up the day and receding the stress of the day.

It has been a busy week because of school students graduation coming up next week. The order for flowers always goes up a week before event day.

Santa-Orion seems to have a lot of event days.

"My dear, you keep staring out of the window. Is anything the matter?" The woman woman who's my current customer asked.

I snapped my attention back to the present and gave her a reasurring smile. "Nothing is the problem, Ma'am. I'll sort through your hibiscus now."

She nodded with a sweet smile of her own. "Alright. Please add red roses. I also want lillies too but they'll be for my little granddaughter, not for the school."

"Coming up, Ma'am." I walked to the inner store and carried out the new lillies that came in few days ago. I have been unable to sort through them.

In the next five minutes that followed, I carefully sorted through the woman's flowers and settled her amicably.

She was smiling and very grateful as she made her payments before leaving.

I took a deep breath afterwards, smiling happily. Zavier is out there, his car packed under the tree again.

It has become a daily thing for him since I got him to agree for me to start working and doing my normal thing again. It had been hard. The hardest thing ever.

He had been adamant that I wouldn't work again, infact, he had been adamant that we aren't coming back to Santa-Orion, but I was adamant too.

I'd pleaded and begged and did everything possible I could.

I don't want to live my life in hiding and being sheltered. That was why I left the Convent in the first place. The sisters sheltered me too much.

I needed to be out on my own. To do what I've always loved. I never had a life of my own, in all my twenty-three years of life until six months ago.

I was very adamant to have that life back and at last Zavier agreed begrudgingly and it makes me really happy.

The difference now to my life months ago is that Zavier is now a part of that life.

He refused to go home and has been living with me all along. His wounds aren't healed completely but according to him, it has and that's final.

He says he stays with me to keep me safe and I believe him, and I love it, but it still baffles me because I overheard them oneday saying the threats to my life has all died, so why is he still so vigilant? Why is he still obsessed with keeping me safe?

When I asked him, he didn't answer me.

In the end, I just let him to do his thing. Being overprotective and overpossessive. In the past one month, I've become so very used to him.

I know that he'll never hurt me physically. He cares for me....in his own dark way. It makes me happy that he does because I've fallen so in love with him that my feelings run so deep.

And that is why lately, I'm more sad than I'm happy. The guilt and shame of living in sin with him is weighting on me is becoming too much for me.

It's squeezing my conscience to death.

I love him so much that I can't even say no to him, because I also want to be with him so badly. I don't know his intentions for us.....I don't even know if there's an 'us'.

Will we live in sin forever or will he marry me? Does he even know what marriage is? Can I even marry him? Zavier is not like other men.

He waved at me from the car. I smiled a little and waved back at him.

My Zavier is not like other men. To him the world is black and white. There is gray but he doesn't know it. He does not understand gray.

Lately, he does everything for me. He does everything with me. He has stopped cussing and shouting obscenities. Yes, it happens occasionally but not as random and bad as it was before.

Even Morris is trying to stop too. He's a very funny man and I've come to like him too.

The relationship between he and Zero isn't normal but it's just as strong as any other friendship. Maybe even more. I love it and I respect it.

Zavier prays with me all the time too. To him he says it's to make me happy and not for any other reason, and it does make me happy. He follows me to church but he said it's to keep me safe.

All that makes me happy. He isn't being godly for the right reasons but it's a step to the right direction. He is doing them at all and that's what matters.

It's just a matter of time. After all, few months ago, Zavier thinks all those as foreign and doesn't understand any of it.

He hasn't gone on another mission since the last time and not because the mission doesn't come. They do, he answers the calls even when he's with me.

But I plead with him that he has to recuperate more and he agrees with me even when he doesn't want to.

The thought of him doing more mission and killings and getting hurt leaves me in panic. Now that his wounds are healed, I dread those calls. I always pray they never come again.

"Is Lani here?" I heard the voice from the door.

Zavier and I has been staring at each other all the while and when the knock came again on the door, I finally walked out of the inner store.

It's my neighbor, Jonathan again. Oh, no.

Zavier doesn't like him and the way he's always disturbing me. According to him he's trying to be friends with me, but I don't like the way he puts his hands on me.

But Jonathan is so scared of Zavier so he always comes around me when he thinks Zavier is not there.

I try to discourage his advances but he always pays a deaf ear to whatever I say.

Jonathan doesn't know that Zavier is camped under his tree outside. This can only mean trouble.

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