Chapter 41

The door shut loudly behind Mukti, as she left with her bags in tow.

Nandani's knees gave out under her and she sunk to the floor. For the first time in ten years, she let the tears flow freely. She then sat there for a long time.

A while later she managed to pull herself together long enough to relocate to the bed. The rest of the day was spent lying on her back, staring at the ceiling, reflecting on how things could have possibly got so screwed up. She had screwed up her friendship with Mukti, their dream, and future careers, her relationship with Crystal, her... whatever she had with Manik. Or whatever she thought she had. If one were to believe Mukti, Nandani had just been a pawn.

A perfect pawn to help put the brakes on their business plans. Could Manik be that cruel? Nandani wondered. If it was to protect his family's interests, he might, Nandani thought.

She did not check her mobile phone until late. When it was fully charged, she opened the voicemail. A blinking icon told her there were ten messages.

Five messages were from Mukti about the meeting. Nandani forced herself to listen to them in order. In the first message, she was excited and nervous. In the second message, she wanted to confirm the address and wanted her advice on what to wear. In the last message, she was tense and worried. Nandani felt like listening to the message again and again, which she did. Her gut twisted tighter with every message.

One message was from Crystal, also about moving the meeting up. "Hello, Nandani, two of my colleagues have to leave early today, but the good news is that we have been able to reschedule for this morning at nine-thirty. I know you are ready to present, so see you soon." The message time was 6:45 a.m.

Nandani knew she had let Crystal down big time. She had also made Crystal and Mukti look like fools in front of some of the top names in the business. How was she going to get over this?

The last message was from Manik. She was feeling very miserable and hit the play button. A warm voice tinged with concern played out at her. "Hi beautiful, I hope everything is okay. This morning looked shitty but I know we will figure it out." He then laughed, while she had knots in her stomach. "Give me a call when you can. I... miss you, Nandani." A breath after that. "That sounds dumb since we have only been apart for eight hours. If you ever repeat that to my roommates they will never let me live it down."

Hearing Manik's voice made it even harder to reconcile what she felt with what Mukti had said Manik had done. Clearly, he had distracted her. But she really cared about him. Was not that worth something?

She did not know if it was serious. She had loved Aryaman, once, but this was different. With Manik, it was like he knew exactly what made her tick. How to make her smile. How to say the right thing to light her up. They certainly connected physically. Last night had been one of the best nights of her life. Hell, she had fallen for him, even if she was not sure he felt the same way.

Nandani knew that if she found out he had played with her and her feelings, she might never get over it. Could he do it? Probably. Would he? She did not want to think so. She had only truly known him for a short time, but everything in her heart said this was not him.

It seemed so far-fetched. She needed to hear it from him. With grim determination, she dialed his number.

Manik answered on the second ring. He sounded out of breath like he had run to grab the phone. "Nandani. What is going on? Are you okay?"

A million things ran through her head. How good it was to hear his voice. How much she wished he was here. But in the end, she said something else entirely. "I need to ask you something. It is crazy but I just need you to answer me, okay?"

He paused and then said. "Anything you say."

"Were you trying to stop Mukti and me from launching Dream Girl?" She was hoping he would sound confused, and ask her what she was talking about.

Instead, there was silence over the line. Finally, he said, "Where are you getting this from?"

Nandani sucked in a breath. This was not the answer she had expected. "Were you convincing your parents not to support us? Which I have no idea they were even going to do, by the way."

A deep breath echoed in her ears. A muffled curse. "I am not going to lie to you, Nandani. But will you let me explain?" he said.

Her head suddenly felt full of cotton. Nothing else processed in her brain. He had not denied it. What Mukti said had all been true. He had been out there to see them fail. To see her fail. Suddenly she did not want to hear anything more. "No. But I will say that you got your wish fulfilled." She told him how the meeting was preponed, how she had not answered the message. He was silent for a few minutes.

"So that is why Mukti is upset," he said. That was part of it, though, Nandani knew. "I am so sorry, Nandani."

She heard a thud down the line as if Manik had hit something. A horrifying revelation was building up inside her because what she thought could not be possibly true, was actually true.

"So you were using me? This was all just a big setup to try and get me and Mukti to back down from starting our own business?"

"It was not like that. I was not using you, Nandani."

"Nothing has ever been as important to you, Manik, as this is to me. I have given up everything for this. You do not understand that."

"What don't I understand? Sacrifice? Working hard? Wanting something that is always just out of reach?" His voice was urgent and had taken on an edge. She wished suddenly she could see him. Was he rubbing his hair the way he did when he was agitated? Though his voice was forceful, there was an undercurrent of hurt.

She squeezed her eyes tight. "No. I will not pretend to understand why you did what you did. But it is just another reason I need to focus on my work. I cannot have any distractions and I should have stopped anything between us before it started. This fall was..." She wanted to say amazing. "... a mistake. We both need to focus, you need to keep your scholarship and I need to finish my courses and launch the line."

"Don't do this, Nandani. Don't push me away now."

"You know what I don't understand, Manik? You kept saying that I was afraid to let people in. To risk being hurt, and be seen to be vulnerable. I was ready to, for you Manik, but all along you were getting ready to hurt me." Even though her heart was cracking she had to get through this. "It is all right, Manik. Really. There was never any chance for us, was there?"

Manik said, "No matter how this started, it is real now. It is real for me. You are lying if you say it is not real for you."

Silence echoed down the line. she heard him breathe in. "I do not want excuses, Manik. I do not want any of it," she said. She hit the end call button and flopped onto the bed on which she had spent a good part of the last twelve hours, already.