◆ Facing The Truth ◆
◇ KEL ◇
"Why did you send me money again?"
"Why did you ignore my calls and texts?"
Great. Time to unpack all of it. He drove us all the way out here just to have this conversation.
I held in a sigh and looked out the window, the seat belt almost choking me now, wrinkling my plain cotton dress which I didn't bother to iron. I didn't even want to go out. I just wanted to hole up in my room and focus on my to-do lists.
But like most of the time, he dropped by my place and disturbed my peace, taking me away from my little comfortable nest. And now we were parked right outside a fancy restaurant whose name I couldn't even read or say properly.
"I'm going to Rome this Thursday." Enzo sighed beside me, his left hand clutching the steering wheel. The engine stayed running.
With my purse on my lap, I sat still in his Audi's passenger seat, exhausted and just not in the mood to be extra nice or socialize. I just didn't want to deal with people at the moment. Avoiding him was close to impossible, though.
But of course he didn't care. "I don't know if I'll be back next week."
"Fine. I told you: you don't have to be here."
"Exactly." He scoffed. "I know you don't want me here."
I bit on my bottom lip to keep myself from getting snarkier. As he fell silent, I stared at the tinted glass windows partly hiding the restaurant's fifteen or so customers. Best if I kept my opinions to myself. Plus, I didn't want to blurt out that my anxiety was back at an all-time high.
He would only worry. Besides the recurring nightmares, I didn't want to confess that I'd been avoiding him because I couldn't control my emotions whenever we're alone. That might lead to me mentioning the terrifying dreams and unwanted flashbacks.
I didn't want him to feel guilty about that again. Except for acting so weird and clingy the past week. For sending more money I wouldn't be able to pay back anytime soon. And for looking so hot in his button-down shirt, dark pants, and shorter hair that was combed back to show off his annoyingly perfect features.
Plus he was clean-shaven today. It was the first time I'd seen him without his usual days-old stubble and dark beard. Did he shave it all off because of what I said last time?
A scowl pouted his pale lips as he gripped the bottom of the steering wheel. Then he pulled the handbrake with force, the thud startling me a bit. "Not even sure anymore why I keep doing this."
"Jeez..." I looked away and focused my attention on the sophisticated, blue-themed dashboard that probably cost more than everything I owned. "I am honestly too tired for this right now."
He let out a short sigh and didn't budge in his seat.
"What? We're just gonna sit here?" I murmured, pretending to be busy checking my phone. No new messages. But a new email from a classmate reminded me of the tests we had to take next week.
"Your family's gonna be here this Friday."
"Yeah. And?"
"I'm not gonna be here then."
"And?"
He sighed. "I'm staying in Rome this weekend. With Rafa and his family." Enzo turned off the engine, his voice dull and calmer, but he still wouldn't look at me.
Was he apologizing? So what if he couldn't stay here all week? Did I ever dictate his schedule? "Then go to Rome." I scoffed.
He pulled a face. "Not when you're being this way."
Being this way? "What?"
"Alright. Enough."
"Enough what?"
"Can we just stop pretending nothing happened?" He finally stared at me.
My breathing hitched in my itchy throat.
He just looked so handsome in his white shirt and shorter hair, with his eyes looking so sincere and...
Was it hurt? Disappointment? We'd been bickering the past half-hour it wasn't even funny anymore. Still, he wouldn't drive me back to my place.
Most likely he thought I owed it to him to be here, to gladly act like I was his dinner date. "Never said it was nothing," I muttered after glancing at him.
"But you sure act like you don't give a shite."
"I was busy. I had to study all week." I sat back, trying to keep my voice steady. I avoided his eyes that were hyper-attentive again. They made my skin warm up, my breathing growing shallow now. "Do I have to keep explaining why?"
"No. But you could be a little less condescending." Enzo turned away from me.
"Why's Lele following me every day?"
"It's just his job."
"Why?" I spoke louder now. I unbuckled my seat belt when he didn't respond. At this point, my blood pressure must've spiked to its limit. My entire face and neck felt warmer now. "Tell them to stop following me everywhere."
"Fine. I'm being unreasonable." He cussed under his breath and pushed the door open. He stepped out without another word.
"Enzo—"
Ugh. Here we go again...
As I tried to keep calm, he stood outside the driver's side, ignoring me, quietly leaning against the tinted window. Did he want us to fight?
Gee. I was too tired to argue with him all evening. Seriously, I had much better things to do.
With a sigh, I stepped out of his car, my heart thudding away, my cheeks still warm. Alright. I'd swallow my stupid pride. We should patch things up now. I would apologize for riling him up. Well, unintentionally.
His security staff kept a safe distance. They stood outside another car parked right behind his Audi.
"Sorry." I stepped closer to their boss, the sunset highlighting the few grays in his thick hair. My mumbled apology didn't make him face me. I swallowed the clod of guilt as I stood in front of him.
It would be his birthday in a few days. Shoot. What on earth should I give someone who already had it all?
Straight-faced and leaning against his car with his arms crossed, Enzo glanced at me, but almost immediately resumed staring at the cloudy sky. "Sorry," he murmured when I didn't move an inch.
"You're busy. I get it." I itched my nape. "Just... I dunno. Call your pilot. Spend time with Rafa." I bit back another stupid half-lie. Maybe his best friend wanted Enzo to spend his birthday there in Rome. Some jealousy dismayed me, but it was obvious Enzo wanted to go back to Italy rather than spend another awkward weekend here with me.
He frowned and kept his mouth shut.
"Thanks for...uh...coming by." I turned away from him.
But the truth was: I didn't want him to leave New York again just so he could check up on the clan's businesses in Italy. I wanted him to stay still, not be in so many places every time.
Maybe his family expected him to go the extra mile again. Work himself to the bone. Clean things up after his brother and uncle had to leave the family business. Maybe they still blamed Enzo for what happened.
Unfair, really. I wished I could do something about it. But he wouldn't even talk to me now. "I mean, I understand. Do what you gotta do. Stop worrying about me."
"I'll just leave you alone then?" he mumbled with wrinkled brows.
"You have stuff to do. I know. You shouldn't feel like you have to explain or..."
"But I wanna be here."
Oh dear.
He didn't say anything more, just leaning against his car with his eyes squinting at something and his lips stuck in a deep scowl. Gee. Obviously, he knew this lighting made him look like a top model.
"Fine," I conceded after the fat and lengthy pause only made my gut churn. "Why?"
"I wanna talk to your mom."
"What?" My mom? "So call her."
"Mykaela, you know what I mean." Enzo scoffed loudly and shook his head. Then he mumbled something in Italian, his brows creasing again. "For someone with remarkable intelligence, you can be so clueless sometimes it's irritating. To say the least."
Clueless? What? Did he mean I was stupid? Wow. Okay. He just called me dense. "Okay, then." I stood closer to him, my arms crossed below my chest, my ankle boots almost touching his leather shoes. "What d'you wanna argue about now?"
"You're serious."
"What?"
"You actually want me to remind you what happened?"
I glanced away. I bit back another retort while my face burned up. Did he mean that night? At his new house? Drats. Not this talk...
"So you're ignoring me again? We're not even gonna talk about it?"
"W-What d'you want me to say?"
"The truth."
I stepped away from him, but he caught my arm. Keeping up a poker face, I stared back at him when he pulled me closer till my nose touched his chin.
His mild perfume just made me want to hug him tight and kiss him. But I shouldn't. It wasn't the proper time. And we were in public.
"What? We're just gonna forget about it?"
"Fine."
"Fine?" He chuckled, a somewhat nervous laugh, while his eyes stared into my soul. "What d'you mean 'fine'?"
"We were lonely, and kinda stressed. W-We had sex. That's it." I shrugged and looked away again. Hopefully he'd buy my big fat stinkin' lie.
"Just sex?" He eyed me with furrowed brows, his grip on my forearm growing tight. "You're serious?" he muttered with a little smirk.
"W-What else would you call it?"
He snickered and murmured something in his native tongue.
When he finally let go of my arm, I slid my hands into my pockets, my palms feeling drenched now. I expected he'd clench his fist or swear again, but he kept his gaze down and smiled instead. I almost melted.
"So to you, that's it?" Enzo squinted at me and arched a brow. "Just fucking?"
Ugh. The vulgarity...
Did he really have to phrase it that way?
I avoided his eyes while my heart thumped painfully fast in my chest now.
"Alright, then." He tutted and gave faint, mocking nods.
"Alright what?"
"Remind me again: who kissed who first?" he murmured, eyes squinting. His face inched closer when I didn't say anything. "Or do I recall the opposite?"
"No."
"Love, seriously now." His fingers stroked my hair. Then his warm hands cupped my face. "Why didn't you answer my calls?"
"Because you still talk to Olivia and you don't kiss me goodbye anymore."
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